@ameliacareful / ameliacareful.tumblr.com
@caranfindel recapped my AO3 fic the way they used to recap the real episodes, and it is a WORK OF ART! She includes screencaps! (It is written not filmed, and the screencaps are WORKS OF ART!) (The Ricola cough drop slays me!) It’s funny, it’s brilliant and I want everyone to read it!
a lot of young teen lesbians on tumblr r aligning with the terf ideology without knowing properly what it stands for. so as an Older Lesbian with some 6 years of Being Out Experience i wanna clarify some things for you.
nobody is saying that if you aren’t attracted to [insert a trans woman name], you’re automatically transphobic and a terf. nobody is saying you have to have sex with trans girls if you aren’t attracted to them. just as nobody is saying you have to be attracted to every cis woman. and nobody is saying you have to have sex with gay girls you aren’t attracted to.
and that’s really the least you could do! trans women (trans lesbians and wlw in particular) are just other girls out here trying to survive in this hetero world. and it’s hard being a lesbian already - but being a trans lesbian is so much harder. don’t make these girls feel even more alienated, don’t contribute to the hate that is turned against them.
if you end up never sleeping with anyone w a penis, that’s okay. being a lesbian isn’t just about who you have sex with. it’s also about who you love, who you’re attracted to and who you date. and one day you might find yourself falling in love with a trans girl.
if that happens, just like in any relationship, you can negotiate your limits in sex. there’s no point in saying “i am not attracted to trans women” - because it makes it seem like trans women are inherently so much different from cis women, makes you sound like you think all trans women look/are the same and like you think of women as walking genitals. which is pretty misogynist!
so please just don’t listen to terfs. protect your trans sisters because they need it and they will always be there to support you if you support them too.
Sam and Dean finally go to the beach, even if it’s just to investigate a rash of suspicious drownings Eileen points them toward. But seeing how Sam and Eileen’s relationship develops reminds Dean of a secret he’s keeping and prevents him from enjoying the prime beach hunt location.
...You know what, I’ve been trying to motivate myself to go and study, and this is just what I needed.
On the other hand, I have questions
Lmao you’re an adult, you shouldn’t be using the word squick. Use trigger. Use your grown up adult words to explain how you feel instead of leaning on a cutesy uwu term that no one outside of tumblr uses. It’s embarrassing.
Idek if this is serious or ironic honestly
Found this in the original post tags and I just... SIGH
Here’s the thing, anon. Squick isn’t just ‘I don’t like this’, it’s ‘I think this is gross and it makes me deeply uncomfortable but I pass no judgement on those who enjoy it, because I acknowledge that everyone is different and those same people may have the same visceral reaction some of the things I enjoy’ and was originally made popular in the kink community.
So yeah, if you want to say that every time you come across a trope or whatever you find icky then go ahead, say that every time.
Also, this term dates back to Usenet in the early nineties, so sure, go off.
This frustrates me so much because squicks and triggers are fundamentally different things and as someone with PTSD, the distinction is super useful!
Squicks are things I find personally gross but may not be gross to someone else. They don’t upset me or provoke my PTSD, they simply do not pop my corn. Example: Omegaverse. I don’t like it, it makes me uncomfortable and I’m not going to read it, but if you like it, you do you.
Triggers are things which directly provoke my PTSD. This means that my triggers may seem completely normal and innocuous to someone else, because my triggers are so personal and intrinsically linked to a specific event in my life. My reactions to these triggers can include panic attacks and flashbacks to this traumatic event. Sometimes being triggered can affect me for several hours or even days.
Describing something as either a squick or a trigger allows me easily establish the difference in my potential reaction to something without having to go into painful detail about why bodily fluids might make me back button quickly but poker games might leave me a crying wreck.
Making this distinction, and having a specific word for something that is not your slice of pie, but also not an actual psychological trigger, is also REALLY important for making sure that the word “trigger” can retain its original, specific, purposeful, and collectively understood clinical meaning (both inside and outside online fannish communities).
If we encourage everyone to lump things that just make them slightly uncomfortable or simply aren’t to their taste in under the word “trigger”, it actually dilutes the meaning of the word. It makes it harder for us all to, for the most part, collectively agree on and understand what exactly is being described when the word gets used.
And that destruction of shared precise definitions is a problem! It is really useful to have the communal language to be able to clearly and quickly delineate between “this grosses me out, no thanks” and “this is going to set off a trauma episode, rattle my brain, and probably throw off the rest of my day/week as a result” while also maintaining your privacy, and to know that you will be understood in what you are saying. Not having it is actually detrimental to the effort of making our communities safe and navigable for people living with trauma. Which is a goal that is much more important to me, personally, than the idea of not being “cutesy” (a word which in this case which sounds a lot like it’s being used as a euphemism for “cringe”).
(Also, one has to wonder if people told Shakespeare he was being childish when he made up entirely new words that are still widely used in the English language today...... 🤔)
I, a person that’s always wondering what’s under the rug, have noticed that ‘squick’ fell by the wayside in fandom about the same time the purity police came back into force. A lot of the tried and true fandom distinction words were ignore, mocked or pushed aside during that time in fact and younger fans, coming into the fandom, were never introduced to them and never learned how to use them or their usefulness. Let’s get specific:
‘squick’ means ‘this makes me uncomfortable but I don’t judge you for using it I’m just not going to hang around when it comes up’. This means that 1. you are responsible for your own choices and whether you view disturbing content or not. And 2. that there is no moral judgement on someone that enjoys something you do not. This is anathema to the purity police. Because their arguments rely on 1. people being helpless and hapless victims of the Great Nasty that is Others on the internet and 2. if you enjoy reading/drawing/interacting with something that they don’t Approve than you are necessarily E-vile. Purity police is about - policing. Policing others thoughts and others actions. Its presented as Saving Children from Themselves and Evil Others but its really, and always has been in any form its taken, about Control. Controlling what’s allowed and demonizing anything that isn’t approved by that particular policer so that it becomes Not Allowed.
‘squick’ implies that I will NOT police what you are doing, I will simply not involve myself in it. I don’t have to tell you why and you don’t have to defend why you enjoy it. We simply nod and keep going our separate ways. I expect you to be adult enough to stay in your corner and I will be adult enough to stay in mine. (much like labels and warnings. I put up my ‘no trespassers/solicitors/here be dragons sign’ on things I post so you know what you’re getting into before you go in and I expect you to have enough simple common sense to read those posts before you open the door and decide if buckshot in the ass if your thing or not - figuratively).
Here’s the kicker (and point). ‘squick’ doesn’t make a very emotional argument against something. It implies everyone is responsible for themselves and it implies no judgement. If someone says you’ve ‘squicked’ them than all they’re saying is they were uncomfortable and (in the true sense of the word) that they’re going to back out now but you should carry on without them. There’s no emotional gut hit to the word squick. But you know what word does gut punch?
Trigger.
Because if you tell me I’ve triggered you it says that I surprised you with something you were not prepared for and that you have taken emotional damage because of this. It doesn’t matter if I did it by accident and the other person doesn’t blame me for it. I am still going to mentally imagine that I’ve set off some kind of attack inside of you and I am going to feel very very bad about that. Because I’m a decent human being and we feel guilty when we’ve hurt someone else even if we didn’t mean to and they know we didn’t mean to.
And that’s it. That’s why ‘trigger’ is being used instead of ‘squick’. Its intentional, or at least it is amoung the older purity police who caught new fans coming in and taught them the wrong word. ‘Trigger’ is an emotional response word. ‘Squick’ is not. If I am going to make an argument about why something Shouldn’t Be and lay the blame for being Wrong on someone else, I am going to use the emotional response word, not the ‘we’re each responsible for ourselves’ word. Because the person I am attacking is going to feel guilty about the emotional response word whether its use makes sense or not. Its an emotional response word. We’re trained to react emotionally to it. Purity police know that and that is why they’re winnowing out the old fan terms that serve the purpose of specifically identifying things so that everyone can be responsible and replacing them with emotional trigger words that reshape the argument into Good vs. Evil instead of your thing is not my thing (YKINMK). At the end of the day, there is nothing sensible or logical about purity police. Or what they’re asking for. No one listening sensibly would agree with them. So they have to rely on emotional manipulation. And one of the fastest ways to emotionally manipulate a situation is to use a word that has emotional connotations.
Trigger.
They have the RANGE
They are so outta my league
Sam is a character that I often don’t get until repeated viewings of Supernatural. Recently I was rewatching Tombstone for the 4th time and noticed some things I hadn’t before, namely, the meaning of this strange little head nod:
At first, I assumed he was thinking about Castiel, but on rewatch, I think it’s Jack that he’s thinking about in this scene. He’s concerned about Jack’s power and realizes that he and Dean have sort of flipped their roles in their perspectives on Jack.
THIS WAS IN THE SCRIPT!!!!
So the reason I wanted to get this script so badly was because I wanted to see if the scripts confirmed/denied my meta. I bought the Blue Pages, knowing that it was only a few pages, hoping for this scene.
It wasn’t in them, but IT WAS IN THE WRITERS DRAFT AND LOOK AT THE VERY LAST LINES
“Dean is a human who gets faith in himself from Castiel, an angel. Jack is a (half) angel who gets faith in himself from Sam, a human.”
THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED AT THE END OF SUPERNATURAL
I would also point out that it parallels Dean’s early seasons ‘you’re a monster’ feelings about Sam, since Sam is now afraid of Jack. But I don’t think that’s planned.
season nine, where sam sees dean fussing over him and taking responsibility away from him, putting himself on the line for him because you aren’t recovered from the trials sam, you need to rest, you need to keep yourself safe– and sam is annoyed because he can still hunt, he feels fine, he’s sleeping, and does dean not trust him anymore? but on a level deeper than that he’s just a little pleased. dean chose him over benny, dean chose him over closing the gates of hell, dean told him to let it go, sam and he was clearly rattled by it. every moment of mother-henning is a pain in the ass because he’s not a child anymore, dean, but it’s also a reassurance that they chose each other. the lying is over. dean is in this with him.
and then sam finds out that his brother put an angel in him.
An encounter with a witch separates Sam from his soul again. While researching how to put it back, Sam and Dean take a case at an ultra-marathon in Tennessee. Oh, and there’s a network of monsters working on the Dark Web, but Chuck is gone and they’re free for the first time in their lives and everything is Just Great. Right?
Utagawa Hiroshige - Crane flying over wave, color woodblock print
Irises - Elizabeth Blackadder , 2012
British b.1931-
Watercolour, 61 x 81 cm.
He was older than every single African country’s independence
Ireland didn’t become a Republic, free of the imperialist Commonwealth, until 1949. He was prince consort for two years before we were properly free.
Ronaldo Marques - Um pássaro, 2017
Virgilio Neves 1. M12, 2020 2. M9, 2020 (Acrílica e stamp sobre papel)
At Frontierland, we love this show and decided to continue Sam and Dean’s story where 15.19 left off. New episodes will drop every second weekend from a collection of different writers and artists.
Episode 1: Big Black Car - fic and art
Episode 2: Aftermath - fic and art
Episode 3: Beast of Burden - fic and art
Episode 4: Take The Long Way Home (posting April 11th)
Follow the Frontierland tumblr for notifications on the latest or more information about the project, and make sure to subscribe to our AO3 collection.
The road so far… For folks who haven’t seen this yet, it’s a group project by a handful of us who fell together to write a few more canon-compliant adventures for the Winchesters, situated between 15x19 and 15x20. It’s gen, and structured like an actual season, with a mytharc and MotW episodes, fic and art and whatever other media fits. Rated teen to mature.
Didier Massard
Three Swallows, 2016
