HELLO I HAVE A NEW BLOG

message me if you want the url!!! sorry it took me so long to make this post!!!

today has been one of the worst days of my life, also i was going to end this post talking about self harm that is probably about to happen but i don’t know how to put things under a break on mobile so im not gonna do that

#collin talks #i'll still trigger warning it though #self harm m /

destihecker reblogged

microcomets

bigsmilenobitterness

i love ignoring things….. people…. problems …. responsibilities……feelings…..

#lmao yep #me

destihecker reblogged

savingchesters

charlie + pink or purple

charlie icons requested by carelessdean
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#charlie #icons

destihecker

wow i haven't been this angry in years lmao, expect the details soon because i don't even fucking care anymore

#hint it involves my asshole roommate #hint hint #collin talks

destihecker reblogged

destihecker

i just drank the ultra blue flavoured energy drink, it was disgusting, this better help me write my paper

destihecker

it isn't helping me write my paper

#i also feel like im going to throw up #collin talks

destihecker

i just drank the ultra blue flavoured energy drink, it was disgusting, this better help me write my paper

#i have thus far consumed 32 oz worth of energy drinks #and still feel exhausted #am i just immune to caffeine or?????#also i still have no idea what ultra blue is supposed to taste like #desperation and misery probably #collin talks

destihecker

fun fact: the currently reading section of my updates tab has said “mostly destiel fic right now” for at least 5 months

#if not longer #cause it's true #eternally true #i mean i could have changed it while i read cursed child #but yeah still mostly fic #collin talks

destihecker

ok im laffin a lil bit over the fact that i created this blog initially so that people wouldn’t know i was trans (since i was out on my old blog) and now i can’t stop making trans related posts lol

#oops???#i want to hug mid to late 2015 me #like it's ok pal #it doesn't matter what other people think of you #you're not exactly happy but you're happier now #a lot happier #ok jesus christ im just gonna stop talking to myself now #again i am way too emotional right now #restrain me please #collin talks

destihecker

i literally just spaced out for probably 20 minutes just staring at my keyboard with the same song on repeat, daydreaming about the day i get my letter for T. which could be as early as 5 weeks from now. i think i’ve decided on the first person im going to tell, and then how im going to share the news on here. i also am now kinda thinking about what i’ll do for the yt video that i’ll film that day if i can. it’s surreal how soon this could actually happen, like i’ve waited almost 3 years. 5 weeks oh my god. then again if this all goes terribly wrong just forget i ever said any of this lmao

#it's 3am and im too emotional #i really hope im not being too optimistic #LMAO i usually have the opposite problem #i hope this all goes well #collin talks #tran update

destihecker

the working title of my paper is currently “title here u fucking fuckface” so let us pray i remember to change that

#knowing my luck i won't #collin talks

destihecker reblogged

casify

adventuringangel

are you city lights or star lights? dandelion fluffs or wishing wells? ocean breezes or warm fires? art galleries or big libraries? polaroid pictures or record players? antique shops or small cafes? hot chocolate or iced tea?

Source: adventuringangel

#yikes #city lights #wishing wells #warm fires #big libraries #record players #antique shops #hot chocolate 10000%#me

destihecker

ok finished my first 16 oz energy drink, i think im ready to start writing my paper. here i go

#ok in a lil bit actually #im still tired #the caffeine hasn't taken effect yet #oh well i can probably start researching at least #this paper is due in 15 hours #i am trash #it's a super short paper though!! max 3 pages!! really short!!#more like an open ended question tbh #it should only take me 3 or 4 hours at most #i need to stop procrastinating though #collin talks

destihecker

what kinda flavour is "ultra blue"

#how is that even a flavour #i also bought a punch energy drink #the only monster with a distinguishable flavour #im new to energy drinks can u tell lmao #collin talks

destihecker

@stevequartz i think so but i also remember hearing that you only develop an adam's apple if you start T at a young age? i don't know how young though and i don't even know if that's true

#replies #stevequartz

destihecker

my second appt at the gender clinic is in a week though! #2/3!! in like a month i may get my letter or prescription for T

#my mom is coming this time #since it's technically a clinic for trans kids #that im about to age out of #so yeah they expect parents to come #it was just my dad last time so im actually relieved lmaO #my mom was horrible with the whole ~trans thing~ until recently #(seriously though)#(look at some of my posts from as late as june this year and see)#but she's doing a bit better than my dad right now i think #my dad still seems to have no idea what's going on #but anyway im excited #collin talks #tran update #sorry for all of the tran updates lol

destihecker

ok but have u ever considered: hand dysphoria and neck dysphoria

#both cool fun experiences #like what the FUCK though #it's like im looking for new things to feel dysphoric over #ok well the hand thing isn't new #i have unusually tiny hands #but i didn't really think too much about my neck before today #it's so feminine #also my height dysphoria and chest dysphoria rage on #note that the majority of these things cannot be changed #or can only be changed very little #even after top surgery im still gonna be a wreck #wanna bet #collin talks #tran update #dysphoria t /