in the dark corners of our world, secrets wars are waged by forgotten legions…

self induced fetal alcohol syndrome

Average Breton reaction to finding an elder scroll

wish I was kidding when I say this but I sprained my knee doing the cha cha slide yesterday. I hate being 30.

Our inquiry for the pronouns of the most humble man alive was refused, "I haven't done anything that makes me worth talking about in third person"

they are adding a new shape to tetris called big mama and its just a solid rectangle the size of the entire screen

we could be here

the housing market is ruining my sex life

nobody can host cuz they all live with their parents and i also can't host cuz i live with my parents AND they removed the LOCK on the bathroom at my favorite punk club bc too many people were giving BLOWJOBS in THERE

Isn't that what the punk club bathrooms are for?

EXACTLY

I feel like the psyops are back…

Wait when did we ever leave

i mean they

ive gotten so much mileage out of this tweet. every time i see something on the internet that makes me mad i just think to myself "people in real life: hey man how's it going" and i keep it pushing

@bonos-grindcore-sideproject This is so good

nowhere else

we dont even get 9/11 off of work. like i guess you were never THAT sad about it