Also on topic of Consent: whenever somebody says "Kids should have bodily autonomy!" some guy always is like "You are too unrealistic. What will you do when a kid is seeing the doctor and doesn't want to get a shot? Would you just let them refuse the shot?"

Yeah I probably would. You're straight up asking the wrong person if you want the nice normal answer here. Doctors and nurses forcibly doing (relatively routine) things to my body against my protests when I was a small kid fucked me up so bad that as an adult anything medical related is a huge trigger for me, I've had persistent intrusive thoughts and recurring nightmares about medical procedures, and I can't have even the most basic tests and health checks done on top of it.

I hate talking about it because I can't get comfortable calling it "trauma" and I don't have any other words that are useful, but it's made my life so much harder and really scary since if I start having a weird symptom, there's nothing I can move myself to do about it.

I figured out a loophole where going to a pharmacy instead of a doctor's office for vaccines reduces some of the stress, but I was still in stress and misery for days before I went to get my tetanus shot. The repulsion is so intense it feels like I literally don't have control over myself, it feels like I can't make appointments or plans about such things out of my own free will, and so every year I have guilt guilt guilt guilt guilt about how I should get the flu shot, and it does nothing but ineffectually hurt me.

Vaccines save lives and all that, but when it comes right down to it, I don't think it's actually a net benefit to public health to give any percentage of kids lifelong psychological scars so deep and painful they're almost completely barred from accessing health care as adults.

I know I'm not the only one, far from it.

Also it's probably actually small portion of kids that would still refuse the shot after having it sensitively and calmly explained why it's important, it might hurt a little but not a lot, it only takes two or three seconds, and being asked what would make them feel better about it or what could be done to make it better

A lot of nurses are demons that see that a kid is a little nervous and just go straight to fucking pinning them down and ignoring their screams of terror.

YOU ARE CORRECT!

foster dad is a pediatrician and I worked in his clinic for a year! when the kiddos had shots scheduled, I was the person who would patiently explain it before they went in. and yes it makes a huge impact, no the kids don’t usually have a problem with it or start freaking out, and if they do, it’s mostly because of their parents. parents being impatient, parents manhandling and demanding, parents escalating the situation by attempting to impose their will upon the child rather than take their fears seriously.

i had a few different ways of explaining it. one of the most effective was The Big Bowl Of Bad Vegetables. ask the kid what their least favorite vegetable is and then make them think of how long and awful and unpleasant it would be to eat a whole bowl of it he size of some very large object in the room. “well a shot is like that. it kind of hurts because it’s like all the broccoli going in at once but that also means it’s over way faster. like less than 30 seconds. and then you don’t have to do it again for a whole year. I don’t know about you but I would take 30 seconds once a year over a bowl of broccoli the size of large object in view.”

if they’re still terrified, give them a hand to hold and a toy for buddy and tell them to chant “only 30 seconds” while looking away. literally cater to the terrified child. terrified children get hugs and kisses and comfort, not physical violence enacted upon their bodies as punishment for refusal to comply.

yes. kids have a right to understand and agree to what is going to happen to their own bodies that they live in. that would be true even if it was hard to provide and took an insane amount of effort and you had to bring the kid back over and over and over again to get the vaccine done. good doctors and nurses will absolutely refuse to vaccinate kids in a severe enough state of panic to require physical restraint to avoid the medical trauma. that is literally how you create adults afraid of doctors and medical treatment.

so yes. bodily autonomy for everyone is not option and it is especially not optional for kids undergoing medical treatment.

wanted to add to this because I can sort of relate.

When I was 12, I had to go to my dad’s clinic because I was horribly sick and throwing up a lot with the flu. They ended up deciding that I needed an IV to replenish my lost fluids. I didn’t know what was going on even at that age. I was too sick to pay attention and mom barely explained.

Then suddenly I was pinned down and they jabbed my wrist where IV things usually go and no one cares that I was screaming or was terrified. What did mom do? She sat there and barely reassured me. She didn’t care. The doctor never cared. The fucking nurse that pinned me down never apologized. After that, I hated any needle shots.

Then there was the dentist trip where I needed a tooth pulled. Instead of being gentle or asking how I am, the fucking assistant shoved the gas mask hard onto my mouth and ignored my crying. Dentist didn’t care either and mom was outside of the room this time. I’ve been afraid of the dentist and the anesthetics since then. I can’t even look at the office I went to whenever we drive by it.

I wish doctors and health professionals were kinder to kids when they’re terrified of procedures and new things. It’s so rare to have a kind doctor who’ll make you feel safe through it all. And It doesn’t help when parents don’t notice their kids in distress.

So yeah, I wish that kids and even adults were more aware of what’s going to happen before procedures. I wish more doctors understood bodily autonomy and gave some assurance. And that parents would help too.

It makes me happy when they listen

Bedhead Peach my beloved

Made this inspired by an incorrect quote by @warnadudenexttime, where Logan simps for Virgil's Tempest Tongue. It was really funny when I first read it & I hope this captures the spirit of the original.

Someone reblogged my old moceit mafia au doodle and my hand suddenly slipped

1/4

I posted this on instagram and my friend said “it’s giving tumblr” so here we are. ;)

I saw a dress on pinterest and had a vision. I present to yall...

I think the only character I can draw consistently may be Virgil. Have a hatless Janus in a sweater and a Virgil smiling! 💜💛

Also an eepy Remus under cut.

some musings; Roman thought he was the last one to leave the room

i no no wannaaaaaa

WE R SO BACK (realized i can draw whatever i want whenever i want)

roman and virgil bonding over their mutual hatred of janus and remus ~ a thread