Avatar

I used to be phonestrumpet

@deathcultforsanta / deathcultforsanta.tumblr.com

I will not be explaning my tumblr name // For my book fangirling, please see: @BunnyReads. Relogger of animals, fandom, smashing of the patriarchy, and puns. Able to go from unapologetically excited to red eyed ragey. Senior citizen (30+). She/Her. Everything is queued because I want to reblog all the things.
Avatar
Gandalf in The Hobbit: You are Took and that makes you absolutely suited for adventure!
Gandalf in The Fellowship of the Ring: Who the FUCK let the Took come on this adventure?
Avatar
maironsmaid

He learned his lesson

Nah you guys don’t get it. For all that Gandalf complained about Pippin, he better than anyone else knew that Pippin was absolutely crucial. Pippin accomplishes a very impressive feat: not only does he manage to see something in the palantír (most hobbits would perceive nothing, as these stones were designed for use by high elves), but he manages to close his mind against Sauron. That is a seriously impressive feat of ósanwë given Pippin’s youth and almost total inexperience. The only clue Sauron manages to glean from the meeting with Pippin is that he is in Meduseld: which Pippin probably did not even directly give to him. Pippin did not tell Sauron his name, so Sauron is led to believe that Pippin is Frodo. I remind you, in the books, the Good Guys manage to trick Sauron, by making him believe that Aragorn has claimed the One Ring. They can only do that because of Pippin’s ridiculous feat of ósanwë. Far from sabotaging the mission, he is the one who allows it to succeed (albeit, not on purpose). This is why Sauron doesn’t think anything is fishy when Aragorn wins the Battle of the Pelennor Fields by controlling ghosts: that would be consistent with the idea that he is using the One Ring. Which Sauron believes that Pippin brought to him. This is why Sauron pulls out his old “play nice and weak” card from his Númenor days. He first of all believes that Aragorn is a lot more powerful than he actually is, and secondly thinks that the Ring is beginning to affect him.

He should perhaps have remembered that Aragorn is named for Fingolfin. Fingolfin’s mother-name, Arakáno, would properly be translated to Sindarin as “Aragorn”. Most people would not show up to an enemy fortress with an army they knew was far too small, and start a battle they knew they would lose. But Fingolfin famously did exactly that.

When you read the line “fool of a Took!” It is important to understand that in the context of Gandalf calling himself a fool on several occasions. Galadriel too sees beyond the veneer of foolish naivety in Pippin. She gives him and Merry belts that almost definitely were once her brothers’. A golden flower on a gift from Galadriel can only be a golden lily, the sigil of the House of Finarfin. Galadriel, while all hell was breaking loose in Tirion, raided her brothers’ rooms and took their belts from when they were little kiddos, hauled them across the Helcaraxë, and then held onto them for three Ages before giving them to two hobbits she just met. Merry, of course, is comparable to Angrod and Aegnor: his great deed is done in a moment of beserk rage, and it is a feat of strength. This then implies that she is comparing Pippin to Finrod. That’s one hell of a complement coming from Galadriel: but as I just pointed out, entirely warranted. Pippin manages to reproduce Finrod’s feat of radio silence, in the face of torture by Sauron. Which again, is extremely impressive given that Pippin is far younger and less experienced than Finrod was.

You see me <3

Avatar

Midnight Pals: Imagination

Neil Gaiman: [inhaling fresh morning air] ahhhh what a great day for a race! Clive Barker: what race? Gaiman: the HUMAN race Gaiman: i was just thinking of the awesome potential of the human mind Gaiman: and the limitless vista of the human imagination

Gaiman: just imagine! with the awesome power of imagination, YOU are in control of your own fantasies Gaiman: all you need is a pinch of curiosity, a dash of wonder Gaiman: and an ounce of whimsy!! Gaiman: butterfly in the skyyyy Gaiman: i can fly twice as hiiiigh

Gaiman: why, you could imagine anything! Gaiman: you could imagine a clockwork alligator as big as the sky! Gaiman: you could imagine a railroad conductor made of lemon drops! Gaiman: you could even imagine Gaiman: a boy who wears glasses and goes to a wizard school

Rowling: hello children Rowling: my lawyersss inform me there'sss some copyright infringement happening here Gaiman: ah but joanne Gaiman: if you check the time stamps, i'm sure you'll find that Tim Hunter actually PREDATES harry potter Rowling: Rowling: curssse you gaiman Rowling: you win thisss round

Rowling: curssse you gaiman Rowling: not even i am rich enough to overcome the limitsss of chronological time! Rowling: not yet Rowling: but sssomeday Rowling: if only i hadn't ssspent sso much on that fence

Alan Moore: [appearing in a clap of thunder] Behold! The Arch magus! King: the arch magus! Koontz: the arch magus! Lovecraft: the arch magus! Barker: the arch magus! Poe: the arch magus!

Alan Moore: behold! the story of the boy wizard antichrist! Rowling: ALRIGHT i can definitely sssue over this Moore: ah foolish mortal, observe and know... i never specifically SAID harry potter Rowling: Moore: i just said the boy wizard named [mumbles] who goes to school at [mumbles] school of witchcraft and wizardry and fights [mumbles]

Rowling: curse you moore! Rowling: alwayssss one ssstep ahead of the game! Rowling: curssse your plausssible deniability! Rowling: hmmm "plaussible deniability" huh? Rowling: well TWO can play that game...

Rowling: so anyway the nazis didn't actually commit those documented crimes King: gosh joanne that uh kinda sounds- Rowling: oh but you'll notice i never said the word "holocaust" Rowling: haha i'm too sslippery for you! Rowling: johnny law can't keep up! Rowling: they'll never catch JK Rowling with her molted ssskin around her anklesss!

Avatar
neil-gaiman

Bless.

Avatar
wilwheaton

BAH GAH THAT'S ALAN MOORE'S MUSIC!

Avatar
Avatar
thebelfry

I just learned that the Russian word for “ladybug” translates to “God’s Little Cow”

It’s the same in Irish! bóín Dé!

in hebrew it’s “our rabbi moses’s cow”

Oh I love this news!!!!

Multiple cultures upon seeing a ladybug for the first time: “Who’s cow is this????”

Avatar
Avatar
dduane

People... watch out for these things!

The saying applies with more than usual force here: if you're not paying for it, you're not the customer: you're the product being sold. (And maybe you're the product being sold even if you are paying for it.)

DO NOT MAKE YOUR PERSONAL PHYSICAL DATA AVAILABLE TO PEOPLE WHO COULD THEN SELL IT TO THOSE INVESTED IN USING IT TO SURVEIL YOU AND POTENTIALLY CHARGE YOU WITH CRIMES.

The most recent generation of Internet users has been carefully and systematically encouraged by Big Data to get casual and easygoing about (for convenience's sake) trusting their data in the hands of total strangers. Time to break that habit.

Don't make it easy for yourself to become someone else's horror story. Take a careful look at all the apps you've been using and taking for granted, and start asking questions about who gets to see the data you give them, and just what they get to do with it.

You are using an unsupported browser and things might not work as intended. Please make sure you're using the latest version of Chrome, Firefox, Safari, or Edge.