@whtwall / whtwall.tumblr.com

it's the merc man with the merc plan.
am i aesthetic yet mom. hello.
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“Using icy hot as lube isn’t even a good idea EVER! I’d rather our parts not burn and then swell to the size of god knows what.
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   “That’s if you’re a wimp, which -- hah -- I am not. I got a solid nine inches that could stand to be ten, so -- “ Wade continued to flip through the book. “I think it’s a GREAT idea.”

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( whtwall. )

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             ❛ when you say wifi, you mean like.. WIRELESS RADIO, right? ❜ this was all so painfully new to him. wireless probably meant something else entirely. steve was trying so hard to keep up with the new lingo, but it was extremely difficult. brows pinched TIGHTLY, staring at the red suited man across from him. it wasn’t every day steve ran into someone dressed like this, in a coffee shop. still, he remained wary. ❛ then.. YES. this place does have wireless radio. ❜
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   “No, I asked if they’ve got any WAIFUS. I got a great deal on roaming data, screw this second-class hipster cafe wifi.” Wade let out a sigh, hands framed on his hips. There’s a pause, as he looked over the blonde -- no shit. “Hey, wait a second -- you look familiar. Oh -- something about yah whole face area... God. It’s on the tip of my TONGUE.

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   On a sidenote, sorry for my cracktacular Wade. Feel free to approach me OoC if you wanna plot, send asks, all that good stuff. I need to read more comics & rewatch the movie, but yeah, just... Feel the urge to apologize for him sometimes. Like a mother.

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 Ugh shit, well yeah, i have to admit you’re still bett-URPer than my grandson at bringing things——  wait. I-I got mystique? You tried to be kind, huh? D-Dude look. I’m—  I’m just- Y-You don’t wanna get  hurt  again, right? 
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   “I’ve seen the bitches you’ve pulled, sir. I respect a man as disgusting as myself who can still get with a collective hive mind -- just, mad props there. It’s like you don’t even care you smell like vomit.” There’s a severity to his tone that probably has no place in all that he’s just said. “But uh, real talk, gettin’ hurt is my job. I could take it. Have at, experiments, weird lasers, nothin’ kinky if possible.”

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          – – it’s a bit shit.  give him a second to just crumple it up into a nice little ball, toss it away. wilson’s no picasso. not that, you know, ajax would have it in him to appreciate that sort of thing even if he was.  not so accurate, either. i’m thinking it should be you in the ground.
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   “Uh, have you considered that you’re a bit shit, and that -- wow. Wow.“ The wetness in his eyes is from his allergies to bullshit, not from disappointment. He’s not so easily swayed, given how criticism is a thing artists have to deal with and -- 

   “Look, I think you owe me an apology. Just say, I’m sorry I fucked up your whole life and subsequently insulted your impressive art skills, and also even though you’ve got weird skin now, you’re still hotter than me in every aspect. I can write that down, if you’d want -- 

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