Nothing says existential crisis quite like a sun bear

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Discord screenshots that make you feel like you’ve been approached in a dark alley

wheres the gif of the guy on fire but then he eats a watermelon and hes fine

this is what summertime is like

maybe whistleblowers just happen to come forward around the time they're about to die. no one ever considers that

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tim: sweet dog you got there. gordon: yes, this is our new drug-sniffing dog. tim: still training huh? gordon: red robin.. what do you mean? tim: ... tim: nevermind...

Guys, stop with the DARE Tim versus stoner Tim discourse, obviously both are true and he's a lying hypocrite!

Guy who doesn't understand that killing is murder: we can just kill him, right? That's legal

John Waters toking on a John Waters bong.

stop hitting yourself

you came back wrong and i am racked with guilt because i cannot bear to see you like this and i should have let you rest. i loved you so much that i defied death itself but i do not think either of us are happy

this is what microwaving leftover pizza feels like

stop it i was trying to be gothic

cant believe they gave this woman enough money to ruin the environment for singing vapid shit of this caliber for over a decade. have some shame man. get a grip. what the hell are any of you even doing

"you just hate her" i hate you lot. i dont hate her. shes demonstrably incapable of eliciting any sort of strong feelings positive or negative from people that arent functionally american suburbia poisoned. genuinely how do you in your mind explain to yourself the need to justify listening to this wjthout a gun pressed to your temple or like a hefty financial incentive idk you do you but my God. my Good Dear God

💀💀💀💀💀💀

I HAVE BEEN LAUGHING AT THIS FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES STRAIGHT OH MY GODD

Except I can never NOT parse the “hieroglyphs” on the far right as reading “I dig that ass.” Which still works, TBH.

do you take a werewolf boyfriend to the vet or the doctor. this is too complicated

Context: she had babies with a werewolf and isn’t sure where to take them either.

she had babies with a what

Dude that is too much slop for him

Y’all I can’t believe the “whistleblower assassination” and “literally falling apart in the sky” company is being represented by a man named Rich White

You could not call a character this in a movie because everyone would say “that’s not realistic” and yet!

I hate work I should be at the (remembers I don't want to go to the club) the imagination