𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘤𝘬.
¡! ❞ You can never love him, not in the way he loves you. You say that over and over but Dazai Osamu has other things in store for you.
"So... Is that how it is?" said the brunette with a tone colder than ice and a face devoid of any and all emotion. He sat in a wooden chair with his arms placed in front of him as he stared downwards at your shaking form. Deafening silence filled the room as neither one of you was willing to speak up, not after the horrible mistake you had just committed.
"You will never be my first love, no matter how hard you try Dazai! Someone else already took that place, someone that isn't you!"
Those words echoed loudly inside Dazai's mind and he tried to hard to prevent himself from scoffing. Even now a dead man was more important to you, a rotting hunk of flesh that couldn't say nor do anything but you didn't budge, you never budged. What you said, it... it hurt. It hurt him and it still hurts. It felt as though he got stabbed in the chest and the knife was being twisted over and over and over and all over again and the sheer force of the pain would bring Dazai back down to Earth, back to the Hell he calls a home, back to you.
Is this karma? Is this divine retribution for all his past actions?
His dear old Odasaku always wanted for Dazai to become good, to be good but his past had caught up with him and old habits die hard. He was torn and conflicted - was he nothing more but a waste of space or a human being that deserved to live if not a happy then a so called normal life?
It dawned on him and after what felt like an eternity, Dazai grinned, a wicked, devilish grin that grew and grew until it almost made you throw up. His face was inches away from yours, chapped lips just barely threatening to steal yet another precious kiss from your own as Dazai finally decided to break the horrible tension.
"You were right dear, I will never be your first love..."
Was he coming to his senses? What was he saying, is it foolish to get your hopes up yet?
You could feel his cold and long fingers on your face, toying with the bruised and bloody flesh as his chocolate brown eyes glared horribly at you, as if they were sharp daggers ready to kill anyone who dared to get in their way.
"...I have become something much, much more important, something that you just won't be able to live without."
You could feel one of his arms swiftly creeping up towards your head and you felt a sharp thug upwards, causing you to yell in agony as his other hand painfully squished your cheeks, his fingernails ripping into the softness of your cheeks. Dazai carefully watched the tiny trickles of crimson red blood fall onto the white bandages on his hands, as if he was admiring the view so to speak. Well he was, actually. Your pretty blood had now stained his bandages and it could be considered a work of art, to him at least but, that wasn't too important at the moment, not when you had oh so carelessly broken his heart into a million little pieces.
"I may not be your first love but I sure as Hell am going to be your last one. And that darling is much more important."
If you weren't going to let him heal you he was left with no choice other than to break you.
This man is so hard to write for I swear, but I really tried with this, m'kay?