choices stories explained badly
the freshman: become a grumpy old dude’s entertainment slave to get money for school where you’ll up liking it, then learn that anything that seems too good to be true (i.e. three people lowkey being in love with you at once) probably is and will evidently fall apart. oh and for some reason it’ll be your fault. it isn’t, everyone’s gonna blame you tho. but it’s cool, friendship prevails or whatever and everyone’s gay.
the sophomore: it’s the freshman except everyone looks like suburban middle-class parents now.
the rules of engagement: don’t marry cheating, lying scum bags who are predestined to be named something fratboy-esque like trent. marry hot men you meet on a cruise after three months of knowing them for money instead.
the crown and the flame: uniting divided kingdoms takes a lot of death and money, also you may or may not have some sexy times with the enemy’s son. the fire nation is the last surviving type of bender and bradley james turns into a dragon. avan jogia is hot and mysterious.
lovehacks: date men for work they said. it’ll be fun they said.
the royal romance: who needs a comfy life in new york maxwell i love you when you can have adventures maxwell why won’t you love me back in a far off country with a handsome maxwell prince? leave your life behind. leave your friends. it’s all good.
most wanted: murder, scandal, and revenge. you’re gonna ship massey and dave and there’s absolutely nothing you can do about it. and not to be that guy but where is book two. not to be shady but we’re moving on to the freshman: senior home and most wanted hasn’t even—
endless summer: you just came out here to have a good time and you’re literally being attacked right now. your entire life has been a lie and your gbf was stolen by sentient plants. you’ve sold your morals so that your fave would like you. why is tony stark so sketchy.
haunting of braidwood manor: you go on a haunted slumber party with a family of ghosts because you wanna help your ghost brother and oh hey, ghost girl is pretty cute. actually she’s really cute. the power of the lesbians has made ghost girl a normal girl again. this is my not-ghost girlfriend and we’re in love, thanks for your support best-male-bro-pal-who-i’m-not-interested-in-because-i’m-gay.
hero: everyone bullies you because you’re broke and don’t have the diamonds for this and that’s all we know so far