Numb
A self indulgent drabble to get out my feelings
Shouldn't I be feeling something right now you thought to yourself as your fingers kept flying over the keyboard responding to the email that had came in previously to your cell phone alerting you of an incoming text message the same phone that way lying discarded on your office floor where you had dropped it before mechanically returning to the email. After you finished with that email another one had come in, and then another. One of the interns had dropped by your office to ask if you happened to know where the spare coffee was kept which sent you on an endless search of the coffee shipment that you knew had came in just the day prior. When you couldn't find it you walked back to your office muttering to yourself leaving the intern standing in the hallway.
You took a seat at your desk once again, pulling up the shipping invoice that you knew you signed just to double check the order. A hand landed on your shoulder and you jumped jerking your head around to see just who was in your office. “Sorry” the deep voice apologized, “I called your name a couple of times, you didn't answer”
You let out a breath you didn't realize you had been holding, “Steve, when did you get back, I thought you weren't going to be back until tonight”
“Its after nine” Steve's brow furrowed in concern his hand quickly moved to your forehead as if to gauge your temperature, “are you feeling alright”
“I'm fine” You gave a weak smile, “ I just must have lost track of time finishing up with the budget”
Steve glanced over your shoulder, looking at the open shipping invoice. “Friday how long as Y/N been here”
“Steve really” you protested
“Ms. Y/L/N arrived promptly at 8:00 AM this morning taking her standard hour lunch Captain Rogers” Friday informed him, “She has been staring at the same invoice for the past 4 hours now” Friday added.
“I'm fine really” you turned in your chair to fully face Steve, placing your hand on his forearm to reassure him, “I just got caught up on trying to find the coffee...” You trailed off and then shot out of your chair, “Coffee, I have to fun and get more coffee for tomorrow” to moved around Steve to the drawer you kept your purse jerking it out and heading toward the door.
“Doll, slow down” Steve moved to get in your path, “Breathe and then we are going to talk about what is bothering you”
“Ms. Y/L/N received a text at 2 pm, where I monitored her heart rate increase before she tossed her phone” Friday supplied
“I have also already taken the liberty of ordering another shipment of coffee as per the last order on a rush delivery. It will arrive at 8:00 AM tomorrow morning”
“Thank you” Steve told Friday before he lead you back to your office chair and knelt before you, “What's wrong doll” his deep voice rumbled his palm warm against your knee.
You leaned forward burying your head in the crook of his neck, your words muffled against him and even with Steve's super hearing he found it hard to understand your quiet whisper when it was muffled. He pulled back for just a moment, looking into your eyes, “Can you say that again doll”
“My Grandma is gone” you whispered again tears you didn't even realize were waiting rolled down your checks”
Steve pulled you into a hug the heat from his body comforting you, the numbness you had felt since that text melted and tears finally made their way to the surface.