Julian: Are you trying to use my ego against me?
Alison: I thought it would work.
Julian: No, it worked. I'll do it.
Julian: Why do I always have to be the bad guy?
Thomas: I don't know, why am I the pretty one? We all have our thing.
Thomas: Who thinks they can fight me and win?
Captain: Everyone.
Thomas: They'd be right. I'm sensitive.
Robin: Don't worry, your secret is safe with me.
Kitty: You weren't listening, were you?
Robin: Nope.
Thomas: Don't you miss the vivid imagination of childhood?
Captain: I never had one.
Thomas: An imagination or a childhood?
Humphrey: That was my sarcastic voice.
Captain: You know, it sounds a lot like your regular voice.
Humphrey: I've been told that.
Pat: I think I know what would cheer you up: a little gossip?
Fanny: I hate gossip.
Fanny: ... Who's it about?
Alison: I do cook! I made a cake once.
Mike: Yeah, it was good.
Alison: Really?
Mike: Please don't make me lie twice.
Humphrey: There's a good chance I may have committed some light treason.
Captain: Can you please be serious for five minutes?
Humphrey: My record is four, but I think I can do it.
Thomas: You've got to help me.
Julian: I've got two words for you.
Thomas: I bet they won't be helpful.
Julian: "Your problem."
Thomas: I was right.
Captain: Do you want me to be like you, or totally honest?
Pat: Are you saying I'm a liar?
Captain: I'm saying you're an optimist.
Captain: It's basically the same thing.
Julian: Why does everyone want to find meaning in their lives?
Julian: What happened to just getting through the fucking day?
Humphrey: Here's some advice.
Thomas: I didn't ask for any.
Humphrey: Too bad. I'm stuck here with my thoughts, and you're the only one who talks to me.
Kitty, to Lucy: Alison told me that if I can't say anything nice, I shouldn't say anything at all.
Kitty: But Alison isn't here and you suck.
Thomas: Date someone who will drag you outside at 3am to look at the stars.
Alison: If anyone, and I mean *anyone*, wakes me up at 3am to go look at the damn sky, they will be removed indefinitely from my life.
Alison: I'll add that to my bucket list.
Robin: Why do you have a list of buckets?