Me: I love being out at night, I’m not scared of the dark!

tree: *exists, looking very vaguely like a person*

Me:

Misha and Jensen couldn’t stop giggling with each other when they came out to sing Alex ‘Happy Birthday’ at Chicon!!

Look at those heart eyes!!!

Photos by me. Feel free to reblog, but please do not repost photos without credit :)

WAFER!!! ❤

Not For Sale

fun on the right, business on the left

I’m seriously concerned my left or her left

I’M SCREAMING this was SO rude

HELP I THINK A GIRL MIGHT ACTUALLY BE INTERESTED IN ME HOW DO I PROCEED????

I FIGURED OUT HOW TO PROCEED

someone: you gotta sit with both feet on the ground

me:

[PLEASE KEEP ANONYMOUS BC I DON’T WANT TO BE FIRED]

I’m a bra fitter in the UK. Won’t name the store, but it’s one that’s internationally popular so occasionally we get people from abroad coming in to bulk-buy English bras because they fit better and are cheaper.

A few months ago a German woman, who didn’t speak any English, came in for a fitting with her two daughters to translate for her. What she didn’t know was that I speak near-fluent German because I used to work in Bochum as a primary school teacher.

I fitted her for an hour (she wanted a LOT) and she slagged me off the whole time - “she doesn’t know what she’s doing / she’s so young– have they given me an intern? I want a professional / I won’t take fashion advice from a girl that heavy / she’s not using european sizing, is she stupid” - and her daughters translated VERY favourably, both of them clearly quite uncomfortable with the situation.

I put on a brave face for the whole thing, pretending not to notice, and then as I was putting in her customer info (we keep a record of all our customers) one of the daughters complimented me for pronouncing their surname correctly.

I said thanks, and casually dropped into conversation - in perfect German - that I used to live in Germany and spoke the language.

Watching all the colour drain from that woman’s face as she realised what just happened, and seeing her two daughters quietly lose their collective shit behind her, was pretty glorious. Almost made it worth it.

If you were to vacuum up jello through a metal tube, well I think that’d be a neat noise 

i beg to differ 

Then Beg

Local Dumbasss Knew What They Were Getting Themselves Into and Did It Anyways

What is her ponytail holding on to???!!!!??

Faith.

what kind of snake is this

A vicious one

In case you were wondering, it’s choc-mint.

‘You might belong in Hufflepuff, where they are just and loyal,

Those patient Hufflepuffs are true, and unafraid of toil’

Hufflepuff appreciation gifset

*Pop* goes the weasel

i love glitches like this

Bethesda Savings and Loan