stay silly forever

i want to be a new yorker. i will call people asshole and buy things from bodegas. i would watch SNL on CBS all night while drinking tap water with my wework colleagues. ill have an eight ball every day thats worth some sloppy mop. i would go to my fire escape to hit my juul every night. i am also more likely to meet influencers, andrew wk, 50 cent, and maury povich. i wish i was a new yorker :(

Fashion is a beautiful and intricate art form and means of self-expression, but at the end of the day, I am my father's son, and I will see a T-shirt at a gas station and think, "Now here's something I can wear to a fast casual restaurant if I tuck it into my corduroys real nice."

I have too much walk-lust. now that my broken leg is unbroken enough to bear weight, I’m scampering all over the place. I got too greedy and tried carrying heavy objects, and that put me back on crutches for a couple days, but with that damage healed I’m back to walk maxing!! my bone is complaining sooo much but I can’t stop walking, it’s too luxurious to moderate.

i am locked in a constant, neverending, knockdown drag out fight with myself and brother i am fucking losing

i am locked in a room with myself and myself just pulled the pin on a grenade

we're fucked

wall art from silent hill 2

Gay asf to be a dentist. Why you wanna drill another man??? Why you wanna make him scream? Why you wanna put your hands in his mouth? Anyway I’m here to shoot you because you’re mistreating your girlfriend who Im in love with and I need fresh human blood to feed my gaint talking plant from outer space

i'm proposing a new diagnostic critera for autism spectrum testing

It is true that the graph showing declining profits does look bad from a certain point of view, but I would like to remind the shareholders that, from another point of view, it looks like a lovely inkbrush sketch of a tranquil mountain range.

Our Lady of the Damp and Rain

have i ever shown u people my hand sofa

my prized possession is this loveseat I bought from a divorced dad who couldn’t tell me anything about it and in the years i’ve owned it i’ve never been able to find out who made it or where it came from. it’s got nails and finger creases and palm lines but they’re all kinda hard to see in this pic.

*record scratch* wait-

what if im not medically depressed what if im just a massive lazy cunt and big loser