What Rhymes With Shoes And Gives You The Blues?

ROTARY_PISTON

i have normal thoughts about the rotary piston

Whatever you say, Tumblr user robotgirl-cock

time to evil jerk off

I know a guy exactly like this hold on

He's here...

Happy 1st birthday George.....

if i was a fine, fragile linen would you handwash me 🥺 or put me in that damned maschine 😑

I have no idea who made these images nor do I remember where I got them but I was amused. 

i cant even genuinely come up with something funny to caption this, it’s just kinda absolutely like, maybe the best picture of Michael ive ever seen. i mean like, he looks like an animal. like some sort of predator, like not a good one, but maybe he can kill you if he gets lucky

tom nook coming over to my house for a nice cup of tea and being unable to tear his eyes away from the mona lisa with eyebrows i got from his wretched ex husband who he never formalised a divorce with

Get Inspired, visit: www.myhouseidea.com

LITERALLY the most Lynch thing i’ve seen

Me at the start of the video

The video

@deadcatwithaflamethrower​ I was just linked this and I felt you needed to see it. I cannot stop laughing and I’m wheezing from the effort of trying to stop.

“Well, that little problem just solved itself.”

sorry i have bubonic plague i can’t hang out tonight

“What are you doing on the computer all the time?”

This is exactly how physics does not work.

Why didn’t she just use the lipstick on the door? 

IM FUAKCING DYING I CANNTO DO THIS IM CRYING TEARS. REAL TEARS.

WILL SOMEONE PLEASE ADD THE GIF OF SCOOBY DOO WITH THE TRASH CAN LIDS TO THIS POST

Oh, wow.

Spongebob Gets It™

Are you a fisherman because I think you’re a reel catch

You spelled real wrong.

Throw this one back into the water boys we’ve got ourselves a city slicker

This is like a round of cards against humanity

awkward when you have a ship full of gay pirates encountering a puzzle with a heteronormative answer.

See I want to know Ragetti’s backstory because of lines like these. I wonder how a man who seems to have been a philosophy student ended up a pirate who plays down his book learning and tells Pintel he can’t read – or was his father the student, and as a boy he picked up big words like ‘dichotomy’ but couldn’t sign his name to save his life? The Ragetti who Barbossa chose as guardian of one of the Nine Pieces of Eight, who is perhaps more consistently loyal to Pintel than Will is to Elizabeth, who casually analyzes a three-way fight between pirates like someone who’s studied Shakespeare, who at one point speaks more gently and honestly to the goddess of the ocean than any other character (“you’re not saying it right, you have to say it right.”), whose first reaction to a ship capsizing is ‘tie ourselves to the mast upside down’ and who sailed to Davy Jones’ Locker just to see Jack again… what is his story?

A 14 year old Ragetti, standing at a dock wearing formal clothing: Father says pirates are the bane of civilization.

Barbossa, the then still beardless buckaneer: Pirates can be gay

Ragetti, looking back just for a second before smiling at the captain: Where do I sign up?!

Yeah, no, see, that’s actually a pretty damn good explanation.

omg

“a man who seems to have been a philosophy student” 

ragetti is what would happen if hamlet had just decided to stay with the random pirates that kidnapped him offstage and fuck off into the sunset