did you hear my covert narcissism i disguised as altruism?

author | law student | gmt | follow my goodreads | i have a ko-fi | also @storytellersumayyah | tulips because an important person once said i remind them of it | blog title because the important person also said my blog reminds them of ophelia

tagging system | trigger and content warnings | tone indicators used | request guidelines (subject to change, check before each request thanks) | blog and asks kept sfw

the heartbreaker's handbook (my novel) | fanfic | drabbles | headcanons | conversations | he blinks | healing | the baby hotchner au | someone to stay

morehotchcontent2020 | ylh's first anniversary | hotchley's 500 drabbles | hotchappreciationweek2021 | the blog's second birthday

web-weaving | edits | hotchner backstory fic rec list

okay so as we may all remember i took up drawing again last year at uni because i direly needed a hobby. since then i have decided that i really enjoy watercolour and that’s now my main thing. i’m not great but my new project (exams who?) is a flower for every letter of the alphabet and it’s so much fun finding random ones!!

i’m not saying i enjoy reading case reports because they’re increidibly dull and long and there’s so much unnecessary to my life stuff in there but they can be very entertaining because what do you mean some guy literally said being stupid is not a reason for criminal liability

okay so this is probably a little morbid but i think i need to say it because a lot of the time people don’t want to and that’s completely valid.

i don’t want my book(s) to be poplar.

i am quite happy knowing it exists and people can read it if they want to. yes i post about it, but it’s the things that i want to share. like the search history or the flowers associated. because it’s not my job or my life and it never has been so nothing happens if i don’t.

i don’t want it to be on tiktok because i have been in fandom spaces. tristan would get all the sympathy and camilla would get all the hate. they would be reduced down to their least important traits.

and my name and my photo are attached to it. it’s not difficult to see what i look like. people would be racist because they always are. my own community would say that i’m not a real muslim and that what i have done is shameful.

and yes, people hear worse. people put up with so much trying to get their voices heard but i am just… not that person who can actually take it no matter how much i want to be

“is tristan a top or a bottom?”

literally it has never been important.

“so because tristan is gay-“

he’s still bisexual even if he has a preference for men.

“oh but camilla sounds white.”

i know, it’s covered within the book.

i’m gonna be completely honest i think (know) that pretty much the entire reason why i vanished was because i stopped watching criminal minds and i also stopped writing fics for literally every fandom i was in, but there was no reason behind it. i literally just didn’t want to so i didn’t but i guess i thought i wouldn’t be entertaining without that? but it’s my blog so i think i’m just gonna try and do what feels fun and go from there!!!

hi friends, i know i kinda vanished again but i do in fact have many, many stories that i want to tell!! but those are for another day.

for now, i’m just here to say that i turned twenty today. my friends surprised me with a cake and my flowers at midnight. we have an exam soon, but we love each other enough to spend a few hours doing something fun.

i hope you don’t feel like i abandoned you- i will always come back, even if it’s solely to post things that are tagged with sumayyah stop

I can’t take the boys planet intro seriously I’m so sorry but it’s the silliest thing

Oh my god this was not a good idea this baby is too cute I want to put him in my pocket and look after him forever

Over six months since Zerobaseone debuted I’ve decided to watch Boys Planet and because I know the top eighteen are absolutely fine I really think it’s the perfect time