Oh god thank you Caleb!

did the entire critical role fandom just fail me by not clipping sam’s glorious Valentine’s day ad for D&D Beyond? For shame!

mighty nein: wow, those last 10 episodes at sea were pretty intense, I feel like we could all do with a few weeks’ break, mellow out, maybe go shopping,

*5 hours later*

nott: so this is where I died

Nott: We were saving up to go to Tal’Dorei. Never did. I hear Whitestone is lovely.

Percy, manifesting through Caduceus for a quick moment: It’s a tourist trap.

The Mighty Nein: We need a quiet place to talk this out

Nott: Oh sure I know a good spot 

Nott: *takes a swig of her flask*

Nott: Here’s the river where I was fucking drowned

talks machina 97; matthew mercer finally loses faith in humanity

When your goblin mom tries to get you back with your ex

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

BABY BAILINGHAM!!!

x

Caleb, somewhat uncomfortable: This is, uh, a small group for you, you traveled with the circus. 

Yasha, nodding: Yeah.

Caleb, anxiously: This is a big group for me.

Yasha: It is?

Caleb: Do you have any advice?

Yasha, uncertain: Well.. I mean-

Caleb: I mean, you seem, um, awkward like me, but you made it work with a lot of people.

Yasha: Well, I mean… You know, if someone has a conversation with me, I will… I will talk to them… annnd……

Caleb: But, I’ve tried that too. And it goes horribly.

Yasha, attempting to reassure: No, I don’t think it goes.. as bad as you think.

Caleb in a deadpan whisper, staring blankly: I think it goes pretty bad

Yasha, awkwardly backpedaling and then immediately shoving her foot in her mouth: I mean- Yes, sometimes I think it’s been.. pretty bad, even–you know–for me sometimes watching you…… But! You know, that doesn’t mean– [stammering] you know, there’s- there’s always room for improvement, and-

Caleb, flatly: I’m confused, did you have advice?

“do you know what I miss? Shaving” 

I’m not sure whose reaction is best

I love the dwarven origins in DA:O though.

Like, just imagine. You live your entire life underground. And you know there are these giants who live on the surface, because they buy lyrium and sometimes they send people to negotiate, and some of them fight darkspawn. Some of them can reputedly do ‘magic’, which is what they buy all that lyrium for, and all of them apparently ‘dream’, which is this weird thing where they go to sleep but then they actually visit somewhere else? And they worship a woman who died ages ago (normal) and a big invisible guy who they think created everything (weird) and the people who can’t do magic are terrified of the people who can and so they buy lyrium to make more people who can do magic but, like, a different kind of magic. Anti-magic magic.

And then all of a sudden, you’re there, and you have to save all of these crazy giant people because a Blight is coming and apparently they don’t have much experience in fighting darkspawn, like it’s a rare thing for them, but apparently they have roughly the same amount of political batshittery going on because there are usurpers and werewolves and the magic-wielding ones have all flown off the deep end, and basically everyone is doing the exact opposite of what they should if they don’t want to get eaten by darkspawn, and you’re still adjusting to the fact that instead of a rock ceiling, you’ve got a giant, colour-changing void with a giant flaming ball in it sitting over your head.

The Hero of Ferelden is impressive with any origin but I mean, shout out to the Aeducans and Broscas as the ones who’ve practically stepped onto Mars at the outset.

Even more so the Broscas. Aeducan may never have set foot on the surface but they should at least have gotten a decent education.