hello! disabled people who use aids (canes, ear defenders, AAC devices, braces, etc) sometimes, but don't use them all the time:

are you about to leave the house? are you looking at your aid and thinking "eh i won't be out long"/"i don't really need it"/"it won't be that bad"

have you considered that that is the devil talking? it may be longer than you think. you may find that you really do need it. it may very well be that bad.

as long as you are safe to do so and you are able to just carry it and not use it (so like if you have a folding cane), please take your aid with you. it's there to help you. life is unpredictable, disabilities are unpredictable, and it's better to have it and not desperately need it, than to desperately need it and not have it

“crippled” applies to physically disabled folks. “ablebodied” applies to people who don’t have a physical disability. there are nt cripples. there are ablebodied nds. there are nd cripples. all of us have some form of disability, but cripple isn’t a word for the ablebodied. ablebodied people cannot be cripplepunk. what part of that is so hard.

ablebodied ppl can rb but do NOT clown

This might come as a shock to some of you but saying “I’m not informed enough on this particular topic to have an opinion” is about 100 times more respectable than being misinformed

I know in school they often teach us that ‘I don’t know’ is the worst possible answer and that you are better off making your best guess than admitting ignorance, but that’s because the educational system is a dumpster fire, and this is a habit that it pays to un-learn.

HERE IS YOUR SIGN!!! THIS IS IT!!!! RIGHT HERE!!!!

it will all be okay soon, these things take time but you are strong and courageous and I believe in you.

“abortion is nobody’s first choice” actually i know multiple people whose first thought upon finding out they were pregnant was getting an abortion. and when they did, it was a healthy normal medical procedure that they hold no guilt over as far as i’m aware. people hate to see it but that’s what the process can and should look like

queer is such a good word. im queer as in fuck you. queer as in odd. queer as in fucked-in-the-head. queer as in i hope you choke on it. queer as in a slur i laugh at. queer as in not like you. queer as in none of your business. queer as in a line in the fucking dirt. queer as in we’re here. get used to it. queer as in this is who i am and what i am. queer as in im different and i dont fucking care. queer as in with or without you i exist and ill keep doing it. queer as in queer

only one person has tagged this as “q slur” so far which is one person too many tbh, so. this post is inherently anti “q slur”. queer is a good fucking word and if you dont want people to see it on your blog then dont reblog this post.

“queer as in spiteful” doesnt leave room for queerphobic nonsense, thanks

OCD can target anything and everything. you're not a "weirdo" or a "freak" for getting thoughts that relate to more uncommon themes. your thoughts don't make you a bad person just because you've never heard of someone else having that thought before.

nearly everyone with OCD will, at some point, have a thought that makes them go "nobody has ever thought this before". that's just a part of having OCD. it does not make your OCD any less real and it doesn't make you a bad person

This is not for you.

This is a post aimed at me and other people who constantly fall into guilt spirals over all the things they can’t do, and feel they should somehow magically be able to do anyway.

For me, and for the others, this is a gentle reminder:

- Posts asking for monetary donations are speaking to people who have money. Not your broke ass, still worrying how to buy food next month.

- Posts asking you to care about [extreme injustice of the day] are speaking to people who have energy to care. Not you, hanging onto your sanity by the fingernails. 

And, most importantly: posts telling you that you are horrible/cheap/awful/rude/unworthy/unlikable if you don’t pay/reblog/signal boost/care? Those posts can fucking die in a fire.

TL;DR: Posts asking for shit you are not physically or mentally able to give? 

THOSE POSTS ARE NOT FOR YOU. 

I don't know who needs to hear this but:

-"it only hurts a little" is still pain

-"I can ignore it" is still pain

-"I can cope with/manage it" is still pain

-"it's bearable" is still pain

-"I can push through it" is still pain

-"it doesn't hurt that much" is still pain

-"it doesn't stop me from doing x" is still pain

You don't need to be in agonizing pain to be in pain.

to the poor (or otherwise financially unwell) person reading this, please don't beat yourself up about how you spend your money. especially if you're disabled or come from a not-well-off family.

it's not wrong to buy fast food if it means you eat. it's not wrong to make indulgent purchases if it means you're happy. it's not wrong to get things to make your life easier. it's not wrong to buy something to comfort you. it's not wrong to get new clothes, especially if what you have is old or doesnt fit well. etc. etc.

you're doing the best you can under an oppressive system (ie. capitalism). and odds are reducing your spending won't make you financially stable (which sucks but still). life is hard enough. don't make it harder by beating yourself up over something that ultimately is not your fault. it is not your fault.

as someone who goes to a lot of queer and especially trans events, something i can't help but notice is that i'm very often the only fat transfem present, and moreover, fat transfems of color are virtually never present at all. the absence is extremely conspicuous.

i know there are a lot of social forces stacked up against these labels and particularly at their intersections, but shit, it feels lonely to know so few other fat trans women irl right now.

side note: this little corner of tumblr is the only space i have both online and off where the fat trans women i know don't by and large absolutely hate their bodies.

we need fat lib in transfem communities asap because it's so depressing to be completely surrounded by diet culture, and to see people i care about so deep in self-loathing and desperately preoccupied with losing weight. it's awful to feel kind of alone in fighting the tide of diet culture pseudoscience and harmful myths about fatness in so many of these spaces, and to so often hear other women who look like me talk about their own bodies as monstrous.

fat liberation now, for all the trans women out there struggling and for everyone.

“You shouldn’t self-ID as ADHD/autistic, you’re turning a very real mental condition into a trend” Ok then stop saying delulu. Stop speculating on which cluster C personality disorder the criminals you hear about on the news have. Stop saying “schizoposting” and “acoustic” and “is it restarted?” Stop using “psycopath” and “sociopath” as catch-all ways of calling someone a bad person. Stop saying “the intrusive thoughts won” when you bleach your hair and then turn your nose up at people who suffer from very real, very scary urges of physical/sexual violence. Stop saying “I’m so OCD” as a way of calling yourself neat. Stop treating BPD/ASPD/Bipolar as inherently abusive. Stop saying “OP I am living in your walls” without tagging for unreality. Stop diagnosing complete strangers you’ve never met on r/AITA with NPD.

You first. If you don’t want our disabilities to be treated like trends then stop belittling and minimising them. I’ll NEVER judge a person for trying find labels for their symptoms when an apathetic, racist, sexist, ableist healthcare system refuses to. But I will absolutely judge a hypocrite. Which a lot of you are

When I see people sharing so much of their kids' lives, I think about that one time my child told a joke, I shared that joke with ONE FRIEND in a private conversation, and my child said "can you please ask me next time, before you tell people something about me?"

And, yes, I absolutely should. So I apologized, and now I ask.

"I love that video of you, can I show it to a friend?"

"Can I tell a friend about how clever you were just now?"

"Can I share this in the family group chat?"

"Can I show your art to grandma and grandpa?"

And it's not like my kids don't like when I share their jokes and puns and fun moments. They love it! But they want to have control over what I share with people. Even without their faces or their names. Even people we know and trust.

And they deserve to have that control.

My children are small so the examples are small. They wanted me to ask, so I ask. Just like being told to kiss my grandma's cheek when I was a kid was far from traumatizing, but I don't do that with my kids because it's a way to practice consent and become aware of bodily autonomy.

It gets both me and them in the habit of asking for consent and drawing boundaries and seeing the lines between their life and my life, their stories and my stories.

“if you’re working a full time job you should be able to afford to live on your own and have access to food and transportation” gonna be real with you brother. everyone deserves this. Not just people working 40 hrs a week

include physically disabled people in your body positivity.

prosthetics, mobility aids, hearing aids, etc. are often extensions of our body to us. not accessories.

these things are highly stigmatized and cause people to think it's okay for them to invade our privacy, boundaries, and bodies.

if u are reading this i am pouring positive vibes on u from a lil watering can

[ID: Tweet by harbinger of death @HemingwayMuse 11/11/23 “they aren’t wearing masks for you because they don’t see you as part of their community it’s not hard. they might be lying to you insisting you are, they might be lying to themselves but you didn’t do anything wrong by wearing your mask/expecting them to do the same. Their inability to sustain community/prioritize inclusion is not a reflection of who you are and what you deserve.”]

Around here it'ss mainly because they think of they don't mean to hurt anyone

then no harm will occur.

"and anyway masks don't work

and anyway not very many people died

and away it's like a bad cold now

And anyway I don't need to mask I feel fine!"

They have literally been through a pandemic and have Nice People Able Privilege Amnesia. Nothing bad can be caused by them because they would NEVER DO SUCH A THING!

"Besides it's Just a Bad Cold No one dies of it anymore unless they're like, a cancer patient... And those people can just stay home! So it's fine"

They really do think like this. No one where I live would take me seriously if I tried to tell them covid-19 can kill or commonly disables people NOW.

“No one dies of it anymore unless they’re like, a cancer patient… And those people can just stay home! So it’s fine.” is literally the point OP is making here.

Immunocompromised people aren’t seen as part of the community so just… disappearing us isn’t an issue. People aren’t wearing masks because they don’t care if we’re not around - or if we’re dead. We’re not community members to them. We’re not even people. They’re not willing to make the slightest effort to keep us alive because we don’t count.

Exactly. They'd never say they don't think of us... but they don't.

"Just Stay Home Then" is going from Death Sentence to Life Without Parole sentence, but they don't care so long as I fall apart via severe isolation issues

out of their sight

and don't "make a scene". Just go away quietly so they can pretend I don't exist.

Also it is a death sentence for a lot of people. It just a matter or how quickly or slowly we’re going to die.

How long can immunocompromised people stay isolated? It depends on if they need carers, need to leave the house to work, have a way to get groceries delivered, etc. And even if all of that is sorted, how long can we go without seeing a doctor or a dentist? How long before we either have to go in (and catch Covid, and either become more disabled or die) or die of one of our existing conditions due to lack of treatment, or untreated dental issues, or something possibly treatable like cancer that wasn’t caught in time because we can’t get regular scans?