HATE when you’re inserting your email somewhere and literally from the first letter the website is like “invalid email address” like yes i know. I’m typing it right now. My email address is obviously not just the letter ‘m’. Stop
damian: mother spoke to me today, said grandfather has been cherishing drake’s spleen?
duke: tim… you have a spleen right?
tim: …
duke: right?…
tim: it’s been displaced at the moment..
dick: tim! you need that!
tim: i’ll be fine.
jason: you literally won’t.
“CAN WE GET A MAINTENANCE GUY DOWN HERE? I don’t think fluorescent bulbs cast that much shadow.”
“You know, you could come inside if it stresses you out so much.”
“Can’t, gotta make sure it doesn’t turn into a barbeque...”
Gotham News Network: “In other news, Gotham’s royal family was spotted in an undisclosed Bludhaven bar last night. The ever reclusive Bruce Wayne along with two eldest sons were reported to be enjoying karaoke night, after their performance however it was reported that two women and one man were hospitali-“
Cassandra: “Sir, Superman is on line one.”
Hood: *lets go*
Tim: *Sobbing while smothering Jason with his own jacket* I-IT’S WHAT HE WAAAANTS! *BUHU*
Bruce: Oh, you always knew I had a soft spot for you boys. *Cocks paintball gun* You can have ‘til the count of five before I start shooting.
“...I- I was just kidding, Batman, Sir. I don’t even know what a scarecrow is.”
“What I would do to see you smile.”
cassie must give real good hugs huh
Jason Todd is an annoying little brother, your honor, and I LOVE HIM.
jason in titans tower staring at bruce: how’d you know i was alive old man?
bruce: robin - tim - is an avid follower of your tumblr blog that has mysteriously updated after years of you being deceased
tim: mhm, at mrsbennetluvr88 started quoting hamlet and titus andronicus after years of radio silence, it was the only rational conclusion
jason: … at least you know your shakespeare…
The batkids are known for sharing clothes amongst each other, so imagine everyone’s surprise when Jason won’t let them borrow his hoodie. Upon further inspection they find out it’s Roy’s hoodie. This causes a chain reaction and now Dick won’t let anyone borrow his Wally hoodie, Tim won’t let anyone borrow his Kon hoodie, Damian with Jon’s clothes(which there was no need for because Damian’s clothes never fit anyways), Duke with Izzy’s, Cass with Steph, and so on. After this “civil war” they all reluctantly agree to end this and all clothes (their own or not) is up for grabs. (minus Damian and Jon, of course)
bonus is when their partners steal the batkids clothes only to find out later that it’s definitely not a wayne kids clothing item.
Roy: That’s my sweater?
Wally: Yeah well Kon’s wearing my pants so…
Izzy: I’m probably wearing one of your boxers, it’s for sure not Dukes
Kon: how do you know?
Izzy: Because Duke doesn’t own Minecraft boxers???
Steph: Oh yeah sorry, those are mine
I love how Bruce tells Duke to guard the Cave & Duke goes "Yes, sir. You got it. Not a single goddamm person is getting into this Cave." Like he takes it so seriously that when the GREEN LANTERN shows up, Duke doesn't think "Hm. He probably has a good reason for being here. Maybe I should ask him?"
No.
He DROPKICKS HIS ASS.
NOT HIM GETTING PUT IN FUCKING AIR JAIL
