“Isn’t friendship fun?”

1. “ who do you think you are? “
2. “ wait , did you just say you love me? “
3. “ please just … leave me alone. “
4. “ i’m so happy! “
5. “ is this a gift for me? “
6. “ hey! i’ve got something for you! wait right here! “
7. “ i love you. “
8. “ shut up! shut the fuck up! “
9. “ who told you that?! i didn’t say that! “
10. “ w — what? “
11. “ … i’m sorry. “
12. “ what? ME have a crush on YOU? whaaaaaat?! haha! what? pfft … shut up! “
13. “ bitch , guess what? “
14. “ oh my god … “
15. “ fuck you to fucking hell! “
16. “ man … go to hell. “
17. “ what did you just send me? “
18. “ what did you just say? “
19. “ they’re totally checking you out right now. “
20. “ jealous?! i’m not jealous! “
21. “ are you jealous? “
22. “ wow … you’re hot when you’re angry. “
23. “ wow … your smile is breathtaking. “
24. “ you’re so stupid. “
25. “ okay! that’s it! put your dukes up! “
26. “ you don’t want me. “
27. “ question , you’re not dating anyone , are you? “
28. “ let me take you out on a date. “
29. “ i swear to god i’m going to scream at the top of my lungs. “
30. “ no! don’t tickle me! “
31. “ i’m not good for you , trust me. “
32. “ no offense but i’m out of your league. “
33. “ so , how does it feel to know me? a blessing , isn’t it? “
34. “ … why does this card say ‘ happy 3rd birthday ‘? “
35. “ so what will it be tonight? “
36. “ please , let me listen to celine dion in the dark in peace. “
37. “ i don’t love you. “
38. “ you don’t love me. “
39. “ … is there something you want? “
40. “ you know , you’re really cute. “
41. “ god , just let me fucking love you , you idiot! “
42. “ shh … don’t cry. “
43. “ i just feel like everything is falling apart. “
44. “ DON’T YOU DARE! DON’T YOU FUCKING DARE! “
45. “ hello darkness my old friend … “
46. “ so … do i get a goodnight kiss? “
47. “  i wish i knew how to talk about it.  ”  
48. “  you don’t have to talk, we can just sit together.  ” 
49. “  i don’t want to be alone anymore.  ”  
50. “  i wish i could hate you. ” 
51. “  take a seat, we’re gonna be here a while. ”
52. “  i need you to trust me.  ”  
53. “ i missed/miss you. ”  
54. “  she/he won’t listen to me. ”
55. “  let me do this for you. please.  ” 
56. “  is there anything else you want to say to me?  ”
57. “  tell me something happy. ” 
58. “  promise me.  ”
59. “  i just want/wanted to help.  ”  
60. “  let me explain.  ”
61. “ i didn’t/don’t need you to understand, i just wanted/want you to support me. ”  
62. “ i’m on your side. ”
63. “ i’ve got your back, okay? ”
64. “  please, tell me you have a plan. ”
65. “  stay with me tonight. ”
66. “  don’t go. please.  ” 
67. “  i’ve been alone for so long i’m afraid i don’t know what it’s like not to be. ” 
68. “ talk to me.  ”  
69. “ i did what i had to do.  ”
70. “  we can’t keep going on like this. ”
71. “ i’m just tired.  ”
72. “ i’m scared.  ”
73. “ it’s okay to be afraid. fear can be good. use it.  ”
74. “ it’s better to expect disappointment. ”
75. “ hope is dangerous.  ”
76. “  i like seeing you smile. ”  
77. “ you look beautiful.  ”  
78. “ be patient with her/him. they’re trying. ”  
79. “ i’m trying my best and it’s not good enough. it’s never good enough. ”
80. “  i’m starting to think i’m just fucked up.  ”  
81. “  have a drink with me.  ”
82. “ she/he is better off without me. but i guess that’s their choice. ”
83. “  you can’t dictate what’s best for someone else. ”
84. “ can i help you?  ” “ i thought you’d like this. ”
85. “  do you wanna get out of here?  ”
86. “  walk with me?  ”
87. “  well, shit.  ”
88. “ change isn’t easy.  ”
89. “  i just wanted to say i’m sorry.  ”
90. “  i guess being angry was/is just easier than being sad.  ” 
91. “  what did you want to tell me? ”
92. “ it was supposed to be simple.  ”
93. “  you’ve got blood on your shirt. ”
94. “  you can stay with me.  ”
95. “ what did you want to show me?  ”
96. “ i miss ____ more than i thought i would.  ”
97. “  i don’t like to talk about it, but i wanted you to know.  ”
98. “ shut up. please. ”
99. “ fuck off.  ”
100. “ hush, i’m trying to kiss you.  ”
101. “  you’re lucky you’re cute. ”
102. “ i fucked up. ”
103. “  i just want to take it all back.  ”
104. “  i can’t sleep.  ”
105.  “ can’t sleep?  ”
106. “  we should get a pet. ”
107. “  if you have something to say, spit it out. ”
108. “ i’m allowed to be angry.  ”
109. “  she/he aint even that cute.  ”
110. “ just hold me. ”
111. “  do you want me to go?  ”  
112. “  i just need time.  ”
113. “  i already made my decision, you’re not going to change that.  ”  
114. “  nothing you can say will surprise me. ”
115. “  everyone leaves, eventually. either they move on or they die. they leave and i’m left behind.  ”
116. “ death is a part of life. i accepted that a long time ago. ”
117. “  i don’t fear death. i fear anonymity. ”
118. “  listen to me, please.  ”
119. “  i’m not even sure what to say to that. ”
120. “  that should probably shock me, but honestly it doesn’t.  ”
121. “ am i supposed to care?  ”
122. “  i do care. ”  
123. “  you make me happy. ”
124. “ you look beautiful like this.  ”  
125. “  if this is your idea of fun, i don’t know what to say to you.  ”
126. “ it terrifies me. ” 
127. “ just let me show you how i feel.  ”

can we go back to the world we had cut like diamonds, we were made to last

as requested by anon. Enjoy and feel free to make any changes !

• “Nobody knows.”
• “We are all our hands in holders beneath this bold and brilliant sun.”
• “Don’t carry it all.”

• “Had a dream. You and me in the war of the end times.”
• “All that remains is the arms of the angels.”
• “Quiet now.”
• “Will we gather to conjure the rain down?” / “Will we now build a civilization below ground?”
• “We’ll come home.”

• “There’s an ancient call.”
• “I am gonna stand my ground. You rise to me and I’ll blow you down.“
• “Hey ___, can you hear me? Let me see those eyes.”
• This distance between us can seem a mountain’s size.”
• “My darling, my sweetheart, I am in your sway.”

• “On a winter Sunday I go to clear away the snow and green the ground below.”
• “April all an ocean away. Is this the better way to spend the day?”
• “What were the words I meant to say before you left?”
• “Maybe I should just ‘let it be’ and maybe it will all come back to me.”
• “How I lived a childhood in snow…”

• “Baby wants a new spin.” / “Baby wants a broken heart.”
• “Hear you found a lynchpin to keep it all from falling apart.”
• “You keep on rollin’.”
• “Better kick it from your big, brown eyes.”
• “Like a ship at ocean.”
• “Just be mine tonight.”
• “So the dollar-shop shoppers broke the lock and they knocked you down.”
• “Better call the coppers if you need someone to push you around.”
• “You keep on stealin’.”

• “Come the war, come the avarice, come hell…” / “Come attrition, come the reek of bones…”
• “This is why we fight, why we lie awake.”
• “When we die, we will die with our arms unbound.”
• “Bride of quiet, bride of all unquiet things…” / “Bride of hell…”
• “So come to me. Come to me now.”
• “Lay your arms around me.”

• “Dear ___, I think of you only.”
• “Were you waving, were you dead on the vine?”
• “Oh ___, to think of you lonely.”
• “I could just grab you by the nape of your neck.”
• “There are times life will rattle your bones and will bend your limbs.”
• “But you’re still far and away.”
• “Don’t you shake alone.”
• “Please, ___, come home.”

• ❛❛ I took your hoodie and I’m not giving it back. ❜❜ 
• ❛❛ Please just… just hold me. ❜❜ 
• ❛❛ C’mere. Lean on me. ❜❜
• ❛❛ You look like you need a hug. Come here. ❜❜ 
• ❛❛ I’m never leaving this blanket nest ever again. ❜❜
• ❛❛ I know you don’t like hugs, but… I could really use one right now… ❜❜
• ❛❛ Just stay a little longer. Please. ❜❜
• ❛❛ It’s so cold outside, but you’re so warm… ❜❜
• ❛❛ I’m sorry. I should have asked first, just… it reminded me of you. ❜❜
• ❛❛ Let me hold you for a while. ❜❜
• ❛❛ It’s okay. I’ve got you. ❜❜
• ❛❛ Everything hurts. Being with you is the only good thing in the world anymore. ❜❜
• ❛❛ Hey, hey, don’t cry. It’s okay. C’mon, come sit under the blanket with me. ❜❜
• ❛❛ All I want to do is sit and eat cookies and watch cheesy romcoms right now. But I’d love some company. ❜❜
• ❛❛ I brought blankets, takeout, and your favourite movie. I know it won’t fix everything, but it might help. ❜❜
• ❛❛ Please stay with me tonight. I don’t want to be alone. ❜❜
• ❛❛ I made some tea. Now, do you need to talk? Or should I just put on some music? ❜❜
• ❛❛ I’m not going to leave. I’ll stay as long as you need me to. ❜❜
• ❛❛ Your hair’s soft… I just want to pet it until I forget everything but how soft it is… ❜❜
• ❛❛ Shh, shh. It’s okay. You’re alright. You’re safe now. ❜❜
• ❛❛ I know you’re hurting right now, and I’m so sorry. Tell me what will help and I’ll do it. ❜❜
• ❛❛ I just want to see you smile again. ❜❜
• ❛❛ This is stupid but… could you sing to me? You have such a nice voice, and I think it might help calm me down… you don’t have to, but… ❜❜
• ❛❛ Lay your head in my lap and try to get some rest. ❜❜
• ❛❛ wait , did you just say you love me? ❜❜
• ❛❛ i’m so happy! ❜❜
• ❛❛ is this a gift for me? ❜❜
• ❛❛ hey! i’ve got something for you! wait right here! ❜❜
• ❛❛ i love you. ❜❜
• ❛❛ wow … your smile is breathtaking. ❜❜
• ❛❛ let me take you out on a date. ❜❜
• ❛❛ so what will it be tonight? ❜❜
• ❛❛ you know , you’re really cute. ❜❜
• ❛❛ shh … don’t cry. ❜❜
• ❛❛ so … do i get a goodnight kiss? ❜❜ 
• ❝  i’m here for you.  ❞
• ❝  let me help with that.  ❞
• ❝  i’m here.  ❞
• ❝  nothing’s gonna hurt you.  ❞
• ❝  if they do it again, you tell me.  ❞
• ❝  i’ll protect you. ❞
• ❝  i’ll make sure nothing bad happens to you.  ❞
• ❝  let me take a look…  ❞
• ❝  i’m a phone call away.  ❞
• ❝  you should have called me.  ❞
• ❝  here, sleep.  ❞
• ❝  if you wanna talk, i’m here.  ❞
• ❝  hey, shh, it’s okay.  ❞
• ❝  i’ll never let you go.  ❞
• ❝  you’re with me now.  ❞
• ❝  nothing’s gonna take you from my side.  ❞
• ❝  i’ll do what i have to.  ❞
• ❝  i need you to stay here, okay? i got this.  ❞
• ❝  it’s safe here.  ❞
• ❝  i’m fine, let me see your face.  ❞
• ❝  we’re gonna have to keep ice on that.  ❞
• ❝  i like seeing you smile.  ❞
• ❝  you’re so beautiful.  ❞
• ❝  you don’t have to talk, we can just sit together.  ❞
• ❝  i miss/missed you.  ❞
• ❝  let me do this for you.  ❞
• ❝  i’m on your side  ❞
• ❝  i’ve got your back, okay?  ❞ 

• “Just read this fucker and take it to court.”
• “Tone down your depositions, A-hole.” 
• “He may be a buffoon and a fool, but by God he was innocent.”
• *grumble grumble* “Sexist bastards.” 
• “I don’t want to come into work without teeth!”
• “That asshole better stop fucking with my client or else I’m gonna…”
• “There are only two pears left. I’m naming them Adam and Eve.”
• “Organic seaweed? What the hell is organic seaweed?”
• “You asking me fishing?… fuck YES I’m there!”
• “When the weather gets hot, I just step out on my back porch and pour water over my head for an hour or two. Works every time.”
• “He is an artist. Use of Comic Sans in legal documents is his creative outlet.”
• “Throw some Wingdings on that shit.”
• “What does a person have to do to get a fucking cob salad around here?” 
• “I’m trying to decide if I should go insane and body-pump or go home and sleep.”
• “You can’t just ring a bell, un-ring it, and then ring it again.”
• “We lost. We lost big time. But it’s okay. I’m good. It’s cool. I’ve got whiskey. I’m good.”
• *applying lipstick to go to the gym* “What kind of a crazy woman wears lipstick to the gym??”
• “Are you going to shut up and FISH today?” 
• “Do you know of any pet friendly cafes? I’m meeting an attorney tomorrow and he’ll have his non-service hunting dog along. Don’t ask why.”
• “Publicly, I agree. Personally, I think it’s chickenshit.”
• “Keto diet? Is that like for chemo? Ohmygod do you have cancer?!??”
• “I don’t have a circle on mine. Where’s my circle?”
• “Don’t judge my printouts. Paper is a renewable resource.”
• “The stapler has been compromised.” 
• “You know that one case? The one with the person from the company whose doing some crazy stuff?”
• “I wasn’t fishing. I was lawyer-ing. Much less exciting.”
• “For a priest, he’s kind of an asshole.”
• “Brownies and bourbon? Sounds like my kinda party!”
• “I got a bottle of whiskey calling my name so I may not be back here tomorrow morning or ever.”

B.BANNER

Feel free to change pronouns or anything else !

• “Who’s the guy who invented the peanut?”
• “Oh, look. It’s a humpback whale. How pretty.”
• “You are the worst! I hate looking at your face. I wanna smash it.”
• “Tell me everything’s gonna be okay.”
• “Tonight might be a convenient night for us to have some intercourse.”
• “I talk a lot, so I’ve learned to just tune myself out.”
• “Wait, is it a full moon tonight?”
• “You bitch!”
• “I don’t need your help!”
• “First rule of watching World Poker Tour at 2 AM: you play the opponent, not the cards.”
• “Boo!”
• “Tonight was a disaster.”
• “It’s a pimple…Avril Lavigne gets them and she rocks harder than anyone alive.”
• “I’m just a normal guy who enjoys revenge.”
• “I’m not crying. I’m sweating.”
• “If you break that girl’s heart, I will literally kill you and your entire family.”
• “What is wrong with you? What happened to you in high school?”
• “Basically, nobody does anything for me anymore unless I threaten to kill myself.”
• “Don’t get hung up on just one girl, because there are a lot of other girls over there.”
• “You are disgusting. You’ll never find love.”
• “Can I kiss you?”
• “Everything he does is sexy.”
• “I need to get her back. I can’t be alone anymore.”
• “I have very little patience for stupidity.”
• “You have got to stop with the hot chocolate stuff.”
• “Don’t give up on me.”
• “Should have burned this place down when I had the chance.”
• “Will you marry me?”
• “I would come anywhere to see a turtle.”
• “The breadsticks are like crack.”
• “Just tell him you don’t love him. Just be honest with him.”
• “I’m not attracted to you. I cringe when you talk.“
• “This is for you, trash can!”
• “Well, this is gonna hurt like a motherfucker.”
• “Walk away, bitch.”
• “I just needed to hear your voice.”
• “She’s the one.”
• “I love you guys. But don’t cross me. But you’re the best.”
• “What the fuck is that?”
• “Everything is sex.”
• “He creeps me out, but I think he might be a genius.”
• “Stop trying to figure me out.”
• “You’re in the gay mafia.”
• “He liked my Facebook photos at 3 AM.”
• “I like a little bit of crazy.”

❝ I don’t know if you’ve been in a fight before, but there’s usually not this much talking. ❞ ❝ I don’t… I don’t even have a driver’s license. ❞ ❝ Alright, I’m gonna pretend you didn’t say that. ❞ ❝ You ever see that really old movie, Empire Strikes Back? ❞ ❝ Not in that onesie, you’re not. ❞ ❝ That thing doesn’t obey the laws of physics at all! ❞ ❝ I got something kinda big, but I can’t hold it very long. ❞ ❝ Yeah, we don’t really need to start a conversation. ❞ ❝ It’s an honor. I’m shaking your hand too long. Wow, this is awesome! ❞ ❝ What’s up, Tic-Tac? ❞ ❝ Did he tell you what we’re up against? ❞ ❝ We’re outside the law on this one, so if you come with us, you’re a wanted man. ❞ ❝ Clearly retirement doesn’t suit you. Get tired of playing golf? ❞ ❝ You couldn’t have done that earlier? ❞ ❝ Are we still friends? ❞ ❝ I retire for what, like, five minutes, and it all goes to shit. ❞ ❝ How long do you think you can keep your friend safe from me? ❞ ❝ HOLY SHIT! ❞ ❝ We’re on a truce. Put the gun down. ❞ ❝ Is this stuff coming out of you? ❞ ❝ Is this all you wanted? To see them rip each other apart? ❞ ❝ I’m done letting it consume me. Justice will come soon enough. ❞ ❝ Tell that to the dead. ❞ ❝ The living are not done with you yet. ❞ ❝ I know you’re doing what you believe in, and that’s all any of us can do. ❞ ❝ I became distracted. ❞ ❝ You have the right to remain silent! ❞ ❝ Stay down… final warning. ❞ ❝ The people that shoot at you usually wind up shooting at me. ❞ ❝ I know you’re nervous. And you have plenty of reason to be. But you’re lying. ❞ ❝ You are being uncharacteristically non-hyperverbal. ❞ ❝ I thought it might lift your spirits. ❞ ❝ This is for dropping a building on my face! ❞ ❝ We’re taking a break. It’s nobody’s fault. ❞ ❝ In my culture, death is not the end. It’s more of a stepping off point. ❞ ❝ Stay at home. You’ll only make this worse. ❞ ❝ Looking over your shoulder should be second nature. ❞ ❝ Anyone ever tell you you’re a little paranoid? ❞ ❝ I know we’re not perfect, but the safest hands are still our own. ❞ ❝ I’m not the one that needs to watch their back. ❞ ❝ You seem a little defensive. ❞ ❝ If we can’t accept limitations, we’re no better than the bad guys. ❞ ❝ I was wrong about you. The whole world was wrong about you. ❞ ❝ It always ends in a fight. ❞ ❝ How long are you gonna play both sides? ❞ ❝ If someone dies on your watch, you don’t give up. ❞