pre-sex prep 👅

-do a hot oil treatment so your hair will be soft. mix equal parts of olive and avocado oil and warm it up in the microwave for about 30 seconds (check on it every 10 seconds though, you don’t want it to get too hot and burn you) put this on your hair and cover it with a shower cap (i use ones from the dollar store)

-run a bath, and add about a cup of milk (you can use regular,powdered, or almond) and oatmeal or oat flour. this will soften the hell out your skin. sit in here for about 30 minutes. then drain the tub and run a shower.

-use a good smelling conditioner. use whatever shampoo you want, but make sure your conditioner smells delicious,bc your hair will smell so good.

-never put soap in your vagina. like ever. use an unscented soap on the outer lips, and use water for everything else. 

-use some exfoliating gloves, and focus on any rough patches of skin you have. especially exfoliate where ever you plan on shaving.

-if you’re going to shave, use a cheap dollar store conditioner or olive oil. after you’re done shaving,use cold water on any places you’ve shaved.

-once you’re out the shower, use shea butter or some other thick unscented lotion, and then scented lotion on top of that. this way your skin will be soft AND smell good.

-if you plan on makeup,make sure your mascara is waterproof,that your lipstick wont budge (try beauty bakerie’s lipsticks!) and try smokier, more sultry eye shadow, and for the love of everything use a damn setting spray!

-i find that ponytails r good for really rough sex bc your hair doesn’t get everywhere and it can also be pulled easily ;) but having your hair down is good for rly sensual sex.

-u can find cheap lingerie on ebay & amazon.

-avoid super strong perfumes. instead put a scented oil in between your thighs and behind your ear. you can find scented fragrance oil on amazon. (you can dilute it in some coconut oil if it isn’t already pre-diluted) vanilla,rose,jasmine and lavender are all good options.

-be sure to drink lots of water and/or cranberry juice beforehand if u plan on receiving oral sex. avoid fish,garlic,red meat,dairy and anything else smelly.

-getting rawed is great but if u and ur partner haven’t been tested wear protection pls. bring your own protection always, be safe.

-look at my overnight hoe bag essentials list if you plan on staying at their house overnight!

my favorite trope is when someone believes they’re hard to love and someone who loves them like it’s breathing.

hello everyone, i’m back with another masterpost! this time it will be focusing on self care and your health, and how to be the best version of yourself. i do not condone eating disorders– this list is simply meant to help you make the best of a bad situation, and stay healthy (as well as offer you some beauty products that are affordable). thanks for supporting my blog! ask me anything or request a post here. enjoy the masterpost! ♥

❤  see my complete post index here  ❤

Reading amazing fanfiction, then forgetting to bookmark it

enter this into the Google search

site:<url of site where you read the fic> <a line you remember from the fic or character names plus a unique detail>

for example:

site:http://archiveofourown.org/ Todd Margo pedicure

Google will search only AO3 and tell you which pages contain the words Todd Margo and pedicure.

REBLOG TO SAVE A LIFE

REBLOG TO SAVE MY LIFE

Happiness Will Come To You.

when tho

When You Least Expect It. Probably Late March

reblog for happiness to come for you in late march!

I reblogged this last year and I hung out with blink-182 backstage on March 30. Reblogging again because it worked the first time.

honestly, last year one of the best days of my life happened in late March

Father, I Don’t Want to Get Married!

Why you so fine ( ⚈̥̥̥̥̥́⌢⚈̥̥̥̥̥̀)

’s…manhwa recommendation: father, i don’t want this marriage

Other Names: Daddy, I Don’t Want This Marriage, Father, I Don't Want to Get Married!

Authors: Hong Heesu, Yuri, Roal

Genres: Comedy, Drama, Fantasy, Romance, Shoujo, Historical, Adaptation

Chapters: 34 (Official Translation)

Status: Ongoing

Summary: Juvelian is a villainess so hated by everyone that even her lover and father leave her to die a pitiful death. Just as she’s about to face her fate, she gets the chance to change the course of her story. In order to avoid the tragic end she knows awaits her, she breaks up with her lover and gives up trying to win her father’s love. Instead, she focuses on using his wealth to enjoy her new life to its fullest! But while she prepares for her extravagant life as a lady, her father begins looking for her new suitor. Afraid that he’ll marry her off to the infamously unpredictable and stormy prince, she lands on a desperate solution: a dating contract. And the best candidate is none other than her father’s student.

Review: This is one of my favorite reincarnation manhwa. It’s different from your usual reincarnated villainess manhwa because she isn’t necessarily part of the strong female lead trope. She’s kind of dense but at the same time she still had common sense. Overall, it’s just really satisfying to read because the art is so beautiful and the story is funny. The romance is a little slow but the interactions between the female lead and male lead are hilarious.

My SO has no business knowing that I been to McDonalds.

"smart wedding rings" kinda got physically nauseous about that

spiderman’s uncle said “with great power comes great responsibility” to mean “use your power as a white man to reform this racist patriarchy we’re in” but tobey maguire responded “you’re not my dad! I’m going to wear a mask” and then uncle ben DIED.

God can you imagine if Donald Trump became president? There’d be like a new bubonic plague and he’d be like “idk drink bleach about it”

Throwback to when I took acid for the first time in 2013 and predicted the events of 2020 like the fucking oracle of Delphi

#relatable

life used to be so fucking simple. you could just be the guy whos really good at making ropes and that would be your entire life

—

What a Psychologist says about K-pop fans: “Don’t underestimate those children who chase after Korean celebrities, their hearts are purer than anyone else, they love courageously, they will want to try their best to tackle difficult obstacles, the language and cultural barriers. They symbolize peace, they don’t discriminate based on race, they befriend people with the same interest from different countries, they’re more passionate and warm than anyone else. They don’t betray the ones they like easily, they are persistent and don’t give up easily. They are stronger than anyone else on the inside, because when they are loving these Korean stars, they experience the setbacks they’ve never experienced in life. They are all sensitive children, easily touched to tears for a long time because of one incident. Their memory is very good, they can easily remember the korean lyrics they don’t understand, and their coordination skills are also very strong. Most of them are cheerful children, not the kind who keep to themselves. Their will of determination is also very strong, they are able to persevere all the way just to buy something related to the celebrity they like. In short, the way these children think is vastly different from others, and their thoughts are not easy to understand. Generally, only those who have similar interests are able to enter their world.“

I got my heart broken and I survived, I failed 3 courses in university and graduated, I got rejected in the very first job I applied for and got promoted yesterday, I went through hard times with my family but then two years later, we laughed our hearts out over lunch, The closest friends disappointed me several times but I made new friends and loved them with all my heart. I did it once, I can do it again.

I NEEDED THIS SO BADLY

— (via vampentina)

100 Things To Live For