bizzle

im getting my oil changed and i heard the mechanic go "tee hee hee". whats happening

did you know? if you do your laundry you can get your clothes back

not the socks.

*examines your pdf folder* have you read them all?

Is a wine cellar meant for storing only empty bottles?

Met an older gentleman the other day with a "#1 grandpa" hat. He asked if Evelyn was a greyhound and I said she was a whippet. He said, "Ah! A bippet!" and walked cheerfully away.

the pussy got me feeling *shadowboxes for a few seconds, does an uppercut* POWERFUL

you should never forget about call me maybe by carly rae jepsen

The unique thing about an armadillo is that it is an animal that can both scamper and trundle

they should swirl . unencumbered and free

I sentence you to thinking about dragons for 10 billion year

deleting files makes me so scared what if i Needed That

no

kendrick lamar wrecked drake’s shit so hard he’s trending number two on the white fujoshi website 😭😭

I love you, my same-aged son