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not your safe harbour

@lordofthelesbians-blog1 / lordofthelesbians-blog1.tumblr.com

Amazingly handsome, talented and charming. Gay as all fuck. she/her.
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So this is the tee I sleep in. Perhaps should have chosen something different for Sunday morning breakfast with family. Mum *narrows eyes* - what does that mean? Me - Rachel Evan Wood is an actor and her name has been changed into an amusing innuendo. Mum - ...why? This is after the last visit home when I bumped into Mum as I was heading to the bathroom in my underwear. Mum - why are you wearing boys underwear? Me *shouts through bathroom door" NOT NOW MOTHER. Mum - do you need underwear? I'll buy you some. Me - GO AWAY AND LET ME PEE, JESUS FUCKING CHRIST.

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At my parents for a visit. There is a lot of vodka involved. But! They wanted me to go through old photo albums and pick out any I wanted. Look at this fucking cute genderqueer kid. "A dress??? Okay... But it best be blue. And I want real real short hair." I'm going to carry these pictures around and slap them down as evidence the next time some clueless straight person asks when I knew I was gay.

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The rage that white men have been expressing, loudly, violently, over the very idea that they might find themselves identifying with characters who are not white men, the very idea that heroism might not be particular to one race or one gender, the basic idea that the human story is vast and various and we all get to contribute a page - that rage is petty. It is aware of its own pettiness. Like a screaming toddler denied a sweet, it becomes more righteous the more it reminds itself that after all, it’s only a story.
Only a story. Only the things we tell to keep out the darkness. Only the myths and fables that save us from despair, to establish power and destroy it, to teach each other how to be good, to describe the limits of desire, to keep us breathing and fighting and yearning and striving when it’d be so much easier to give in. Only the constitutive ingredients of every human society since the Stone age.
Only a story. Only the most important thing in the whole world.
The people who are upset that the faces of fiction are changing are right to worry. It’s a fundamental challenge to a worldview that’s been too comfortable for too long. The part of our cultural imagination that places white Western men at the centre of every story is the same part that legitimises racism and sexism. The part of our collective mythos that encourages every girl and brown boy to identify and empathise with white male heroes is the same part that reacts with rage when white boys are asked to imagine themselves in anyone else’s shoes.
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jholltzmann

Reasons why Patty Tolan is a blessing:

- talks to everyone who passes her booth and seems to remember their names - she is so nice to everyone - world’s nicest badass - the entire spray paint scene - “bye patty! love you!” - she thought the ghostbusters was a book club and still stuck around anyway. - she knows so much about the history of New York, like seriously this is impressive considering I can’t remember what happened 10min ago. - “room full of nightmares” me too patty, me too - she just brushed off not being caught when stage diving and just carried on with what she was doing. - (that stage dive was so badass, she deserved to be caught) - kept her cool when a ghost dragon was using her as a seat - shes incredibly thoughtful - bought sandwiches for everyone because she knows they’re hungry and really absorbed in their work and just someone has to look after them. -fought off a possessed abby with one hand whilst saving holtzmann with the other - “THE POWER OF PATTY COMPELS YOU!”

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beetledrink

trying to eat healthy while not going broke is so stressful

every tip page is one of several archetypes

  • eating healthy isnt expensive its actually cheaper than fast food, also im a millionaire and i havent looked at a mcdonalds value meal in 200 years. first step buy gold plated raw cabbage
  • throw some shit into a casserole dish for your horrible children. they wont taste it. who cares
  • the local parks will let u eat their trees leaves for free (:
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titleknown

Reblogging because that is the funniest description of foodie-based classism I have seen in ages. @apricops, any additiions to those archetypes?

  • these ingredients are so cheap to buy in bulk, never mind that the prep will take you hours, you’re not tired are you? BEANS!!
  • Quick, easy, and cheap! Required: 3 saucepans of different size, food processor, 12 ramekins, kitchen scale, microplane grater, cooling rack, piping bag, oyster knife, CrockPot™
  • Pick up these weird esoteric ingredients at any of your nearby supermarkets! I have never heard of ‘food deserts’ before and I refuse to believe that anyone lives further than 2 miles away from a Whole Foods
  • Canned foods are Of The Devil and you must always buy FRESH FRESH FRESH! Food spoilage problems? Just throw it away and buy more next week!
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kanthia
  • meat causes CANCER! sugar causes SUPER CANCER!! freeze raw lemons and eat them whole to NEVER DIE EVER AGAIN
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shanology
  • eat a handful of live pillbugs to punish your filthy organs for their sins
  • Hummus. Dip everything in hummus. Dip your quinoa in hummus. Dip your kale in hummus. Make your own hummus. Bathe in hummus.

Bwahaha all fucking true.

And lets not forget green juicing. You can buy greens in bulk and and and

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Why Miss Jones, you're beautiful!

I have an absolute fucker of a meeting today. Seeing as studies say that women who don't wear make up at work are seen as lazy and unprofessional (true facts, I'll find the science) I made the tiniest effort and wore make up. And a cardigan. *shudder* I just want people to realise I'm lazy and unprofessional by my actions, ya know? Not my face. Don't get me wrong, we are talking the bare fucking minimum; tinted moisturiser, eyeliner, that sort of shit. I just walked into the office and you would have thought I was wearing a ball gown. Ffs people, chill. It's a bit of brownish eyeliner, not a fucking wedding dress. Stop twittering at me about how pretty I look. *rubs crossly at face* The fucking games we play, man.

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