why are people even questioning obesity in america

why is your tea liquidised?

….. Where exactly do you live that the tea isn’t liquid?!?

ENGLAND. WHERE IT IS IN A BAG AND YOU MAKE IT YOURSELF.

like what do you do with already liquid tea? Microwave it?

No it’s sweet tea you drink it cold

WHO DRINKS COLD TEA???

HAVE YOU NEVER HAD ICED/SWEET TEA BEFORE?!?

so i reblogged this from a british person and i’ve been laughing at their tags for 600 years

England, you stole tea from China.  You’ve had it a mere 4 centuries compared to their 30+.  Don’t play like you’re some kind of authority.

[skeletons ooh-ing]

Shots fired. World War Tea has officially begun.

#INTO THE HARBOR

Englad doesn’t own anything

except that time we owned most of the world

If I stop reblogging this, I’ve gone to the other side.

I have only seen this legendary post in screenshots, so today is a blessed day.

HAH

BOSTON TEA PARTY PART 2

HOLY HELL I FOUND IT

And this is why I love Tumblr

Drinking cold tea is like drinking cold hot chocolate. Sure, you *can* do it, but you *really shouldn’t*

Behold concerned Brit. Chocolate Milk

I only see this on pinterest omg….

Never. Not. Reblog.

Amazing. Amazing. Amazing.

PSA

this is such bullshit i’m fucking furious

Sometimes gay ships are incredibly straight if you know what I mean

Like those ships where its two male characters who have zero chemistry and barely spoke in canon but every single person ships them so you cant say anything bad abt it even though you know people really only ship them because they’re the two most conventionally attractive male characters to force together so female fans can quench their thirst for yaoi

*stares violently at the wwe fandom*

Ive gotta say this takes the cake for the most unexpected comment on this post

*aggressively doesn’t know*

imagine…WWE Champion Kofi Kingston

Roses are red, that much is true, but violets are purple, not fucking blue.

I have been waiting for this post all my life.

They are indeed purple, But one thing you’ve missed: The concept of “purple” Didn’t always exist.

Some cultures lack names For a color, you see. Hence good old Homer And his “wine-dark sea.”

A usage so quaint, A phrasing so old, For verses of romance Is sheer fucking gold.

So roses are red. Violets once were called blue. I’m hugely pedantic But what else is new?

My friend you’re not wrong About Homer’s wine-ey sea! Colours are a matter Of cultural contingency;

Words are in flux And meanings they drift But the word purple You’ve given short shrift.

The concept of purple, My friends, is old And refers to a pigment once precious as gold.

By crushing up molluscs From the wine-dark sea You make a dye: Imperial decree

Meant that in Rome, to wear purpura was a privilege reserved

For only the emperor!

The word ‘purple’, for clothes so fancy, Entered English By the ninth century

.

Why then are voilets Not purple in song? The dye from this mollusc, known for so long

Is almost magenta; More red than blue. The concept of purple is old, and yet new.

The dye is red, So this might be true: Roses are purple And violets are blue

.

While this song makes me merry, Tyrian purple dyes many a hue From magenta to berry And a true purple too.

But fun as it is to watch this poetic race The answer is staring you right in the face: Roses are red and violets are blue Because nothing fucking rhymes with purple.

Hirple - To limp or walk awkwardly

Cirple - An old Scots word for the hindquarters of a horse

“Roses are red, violets are purple,

My boner for you has caused me to hirple.”

…

DYING. I AM DYING.

Calling theshitpostcalligrapher! We need @theshitpostcalligrapher

@kiranovember u better buy this as a commission lmao

This post has evolved.

Niggapotamus🤣😂

“Lower tier”

What does that even mean?

NIGGAPOTAMUS 💀😂😂

always the ugly ones that say stupid shit

Husbands being high key Done™ with aliens 5 mins after meeting them

Thor: Ragnarok (2017) // Avengers: Infinity War (2018)

Things my brother has said to me since I’ve come out

Bro: You can’t say you’re pan if you’ve only dated cis-boys Jess..

Me: Then you can’t say you’re straight since you’ve never had a girlfriend

Bro: touche…

____________________________________________________________

Bro: so you like girls?

Me: yep

Bro: so youre gonna get a girlfriend?

Me: maybe

Bro: NOW I GOTTA COMPETE AGAINST YOU TOO?? 

____________________________________________________________

Bro: wanna bet on who kisses a girl first?

Me: sure… $10?

Bro: okay

Me: sweet…cough up the money because i already kissed three

Bro: WHAT?? WHO?? you whore…No but seriously who because we only have like 2 lesbians in our school….

____________________________________________________________

Bro: I SWEAR TO GOD IF I HEAR ONE MORE PUN ABOUT YOU AND KITCHENWEAR IM KILLING YOU

____________________________________________________________

Brothers friend: so your sister is pan?

Bro: yeah?

Friend: what’s that?

Bro: basically she’ll date anyone

Friend: think she’ll date me?

Bro: ew no, dude she has standered still..

____________________________________________________________

Bro: so…how was narnia?

____________________________________________________________

Mother: i dont want you going to (insert friend)’s house because you’re pan and they are too

Bro: shes 18 mom AND you had no problem with it before jess was out

Mother: yeah but-

Bro: and they’re both girls so its not like even if something DID happen she wouldn’t get pregnant or anything

Mother: yeah but-

Bro: just let her hang out with the one friend she still has

____________________________________________________________

Bro: *is complaning about something* Thats so ga- OH MY GOD IM SO SORRY IT SLIPPED

____________________________________________________________

Bro: *shows me a picture of a girl* do you think shes hot?

Me: ew no

Bro: I AM TRYING TO GET YOU A GIRLFRIEND STOP BEING PICKY WOMAN WE LIVE IN THE MIDDLE OF NO WHERE THERE ARENT THAT MANY OPTIONS 

____________________________________________________________

Me: *is complaining to my brother about this dude on campus* -anyways hes so not my type

Mother: but youre pan and ‘youre attracted to everyone regardless of gender’ so you dont have a type

Bro: thats like saying because i’m straight i like every girl mom…she can be pan and have types you limp lettuce

____________________________________________________________

Bro: do you think grandma will freak out when she finds out you’re queer?

Me: hopefully

Bro: sweet…..can i tell her??

Me: no?

Bro: dammit…

____________________________________________________________

Bro: *is playing COD online in his room* Guys seriously stop saying the F slur

Bro: Seriously i dont care about your kill streak, i will shoot you

Bro: NO SCOPE! I warned you!

____________________________________________________________

Bro: you know what my favorite part of you being pan is?

Me: what?

Bro: you’re no longer grandmas favorite…now i get all the money/food

____________________________________________________________

Bro: aw fuck

Me: what?

Bro: what if you get a girlfriend one day and she breaks your heart? i can’t punch a girl! 

Me: no thats okay-

Bro: HOW WILL I DEFEND YOUR HONOR???

This is so sweet actually

@zaiyo

YOU LIMP LETTUCE

things got a little heated in the gc today

205 live // march 20th, 2018

T’Challa when Erik was about to kill Shuri:

😂😂😂😂

*t’chaka dies in captain america: civil war (2016)*

*black panther (2018) reveals that he killed his brother and left his nephew, erik,  alone to find his father’s dead body and never bothered to check on erik*

what the actual fuck is this weather?!