so there's this guy
i worked with his mom and have known him for about 8 years but never really gotten to know him
but we've gone out to dinner with two of our mutual friends a few times and like he's really funny and i really think i could like him but i'm terrified
i'm 31 and i'm terrified
i mean 1) if it doesn't work out, we share 75% of my social circle and im terrified my whole life will change
and 2) if it does work out, i'm still terrified my whole life will change
and like so many other things. like his mom. i love her to death and i worked with her and like if things don't (or do!!) work out, how do i navigate that change???
and then there's this other guy i'm still hung up on who for 9 years i was convinced i was meant to be with, and the chances that something will happen between us right now are slim to none but how do i know that it won't ever happen and will i regret committing to someone else
this is one of the first times that i've seriously considered a relationship and it's terrifying
also he's like 5 years younger than me but that's hardly an issue compared to my debilitating fear of change and relationships and commitment and
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh