Avatar

Cabáná

@strayrey-blog

Dripping
~Los qinhuangdao ~
Avatar

Real talk, though, because it needs to be said: as much as we all joke that porn was the only good thing this place had left, the reality is that it being the only place where one could regularly engage with and promote sexual content being gone is really not understanding at all what makes this place special. I mean we all joke about “horny on main” and all that, but the reality is that for a lot of the LGTBQ+ community, particularly younger members still discovering themselves and members in extremely homophobic environments where most media sites were banned (but Tumblr wasn’t even considered important enough to be), this was a bastion of information and self-expression. For a lot of artists too, this was a great place to come and post NSFW work and get traction that became Patreon pages that became honest jobs. The problem with “family friendly” social media is that more often than not, the ones hit  the most by the whole family friendly nonsense are marginalized groups that have no vehicles to express themselves. Stuff like YouTube consistently bans or flags simple content featuring something as innocuous as two men kissing as “adult” content and makes it hard for LGBTQ+ content creators to compete with their non-queer peers for a lot of those reasons. The ultimate problem isn’t even that banning of NSFW content, it’s the general mess surrounding it and unintended consequences to these groups. For MONTHS Tumblr has had a huge problem with porn spam bots and outright child pornography, and for MONTHS the majority of the userbase has been in general consensus that both of these things needed to stop. Tumblr did NOTHING. Absolutely nothing. When Apple finally removed their app from the store, SPECIFICALLY because of the child pornography, Tumblr decided to do what any rich corporation owning a social media site with zero understanding of what makes it popular would do, and decided that the best course of action was to eat itself like an Ouroboros. Rather than admit that they have done an absolutely shit job at keeping pedophiles off this website and rather than hiring the necessary staff to carefully moderate content, they decided to loose a poorly programmed bot that literally deleted perfectly SFW blogs with thousands of followers, and rather than properly handling moderation, they decided that it was best to simply go the lazy route and block anything even remotely NSFW. They run this site in the worst way possible, and I don’t understand how @support or @staff or their completely oblivious “CEO” plans to keep this sinking ship alive.

Avatar

this is the money dog, repost in the next 24 hours and money will come your way!!

Avatar
jaxblade

ehh what the hell

OH MY GOD SO NO FUCKIN BULLSHIT I SWEAR To GOD. I reblogged this an hour ago and IM NOT Lying My Tax Refund which I did in late march popped into my Bank Account, and it was a Decent sized amount……

WHAT THE FUCK Is THIS MAGIC!??!?!?! Im trying this again IM NOT BSing hahahaha thats actually pretty cool xD

yooooo

yoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

FUCKIN YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

no BULLSHIT I KID YOU NOT! Look what I found while walking Home…..

OH MY GOD

OH MY F*CKIN GOD

THIS POST FUCKIN WORKS?!?!?! THIS IS PAST A COINCIDENCE NO WAY!??! NO FRIGGIN WAY!!! 

Im Going to reblog this every day to test this, its MAGIC ITS FRIGGIN MAGIC 

I need to believe in the heart of the post…

Oh? Well… *reblag*

i reblogged this and now my uncle is giving me 250 to dye my hair nani the fucko

Avatar
qslay

I have nothing to lose

my palm was itchin today not riskin it

I always reblog the money posts cause I can’t afford not too lol

It works. I just got $300 for no reason.

Money dog is my friend

Money dog is the shit

I believe in the money dog😀

I believe in the money 🐶

Avatar
cosmic-noir

Bless me pls money pup 🙏🐕

Just woke up 🙌🏿

Pplease😭🙏🏽

Doing this again because last time I reblogged this I got $50

can’t not reblog the money dog

Oh what the hell

Avatar

She went off on a racist cop for brutally beating an unarmed black man 👏🏾

THESE ARE PEOPLE WE NEED IN OUR SOCIETY YAAAAS

Make this VIRAL! #BlackLivesMatter 

Avatar

all the other legendaries: *fighting*

lugia and ho-oh:

Avatar
languormae

i will never pass up this post

Avatar

Save The Blogs!

Okay, folks. So. Tumblr’s jumped the shark in a big way, and I’m not even just talking about indiscriminately blocking all “adult” content on a platform that IS, in fact, primarily 18+.

Many blogs, like the wonderful @blackkatmagic , that are not especially NSFW have vanished.

(And I for one LIKE being able to go to curated porn blogs run by actual people and have a chance of finding stuff to my taste, it was one of the things that kept me on this hellsite, but that’s another issue entirely.)

I know lots of people are talking about migrating, but none of us are sure to where yet. Pillowfort seems to be an option, some people are talking about Twitter. But for now, it’s a mess, and even if we knew where we were going, it’s often a huge process, and a lot of us have stuff on tumblr that ONLY exists there. One possible quick solution to save your blogs, both NSFW and personal, is to import it to WordPress. I found this solution through from frantic googling on how to save an entire blog, text posts an all. There are several apps for downloading all the pictures from a tumblr, (Plently for Windows, but only a few paid ones for mac, of which Tumbelog Picture Downloader is working for me so far) but this is the only solution I’ve seen so far that allows you to save EVERYTHING. I downloaded my NSFW blog in like 10 min. My regular blog, which is significantly larger, is in the process of importing, but I don’t anticipate any problems. I will, of course, update you if I have any.  

This tutorial I found worked really easily. http://quickguide (.) tumblr (.) com/post/39780378703/backing-up-your-tumblr-blog-to-wordpress

I put parenthesis around the .’s like we’re back in FF-Hell, just in case tumblr’s new thing about outgoing links kicks in. You know what to do.  To break it down, just in case:

 Sign up for a WordPress.com account at wordpress (.) com/start You’ll have to create an account, with your email, a username, and a password. They should send you a confirmation email immediately, check it, activate it, and you’re good to go. On the site, it will ask you for a site name. That page asks you a bunch of other information too, but you only have to fill out the site name.

Then you have to give your site a URL. If you’re lucky, your tumblr URL is still available, if not you’ll have to come up with another one, sorry.

It will tell you if that option is still available for free.

Then it will ask you to pick a plan. Free is really good enough, I swear.

Now you’re set up! You can import your tumblr! The only differences from the linked tutorial are that the Import button is now on the first level menu, not in tools.

Hit Import, then you have to follow the link for “other importers”  at the bottom, to find the option for Tumblr.

Then you’ll have to sign in with tumblr, using your normal tumblr credentials. You’ll be redirected there automatically. You’ll have to allow Wordpress permissions on your blog.

Then your blogs, including all your sideblogs, will show up in wordpress.

Hit import, wait a WHILE depending on the size of your blog, and you’re done!

ALSO!!

I made my NSFW blog private for now, since I don’t know WP’s policy on NSFW.

This means that to access it, someone has to have an account and request access. But hey, part of our problem on this hellsite has been people going places they aren’t wanted, so I don’t personally see this as a bad thing. They can send a request from the landing site on your blog, you get an email, click a link in the email, and PRESTO, they have access. To make it private, go to Settings > Reading > Site Visibility. Go back and check, it took me changing the setting twice for it to actually stick. tl;dr, you can import your entire blog to wordpress in just a few steps.  I’m going to tag the hell out of this, in no particular order. PLEASE reblog this and spread the word so people know it’s an option. If you’re having trouble, PM me, and I’m happy to help.

There are a whole bunch more, but that’s a start. Please reblog the hell out of this, so people are aware of this one simple option.

For people asking how to backup thier blog

Avatar

MASCULINITY AND HOMOSEXUALITY

The problem is that homosexuality and effeminacy are virtually synonymous in the modern public’s mind. All men who love men are stigmatized as being intrinsically effeminate. Men who engage in homosexual sex are expected to embrace gay culture and are believed, especially by other homosexuals, to be ‘girls on the inside’—no matter how they look and behave, or what their interests may be. As I mentioned above, a sense of manhood is important to most men. Yet, simply by acknowledging same-sex desire, men are expected to relinquish their manhood. They must submit to psychological castration. While this may seem like no great loss to effeminate men who never put much stock in manhood, what of those who do hold masculinity in high regard? What of those androphiles who love men and love being men, for whom masculinity is a thing of beauty and value? I don’t love men because I see myself as girlish; I love men because I’ve developed a deep-seated appreciation for men and for masculinity itself. Men fascinate and inspire me. I love them in their finest moments, but also in the midst of struggle. Just watching men is a pleasure; I see in them innumerable qualities that women often fail to appreciate. I appreciate these things precisely because I am a man, because their masculinity is a reflection of my own. And yet, for this, in some perverse twist of reason, I must give up my own manhood? For this, I am regarded as effeminate and expected to entertain myself with girly things? Fuck that. - Jack Donovan

He gets it!!!

Avatar
Avatar
scriptshrink

Characterizing Abusers: Central Beliefs & Attitudes

It is an unfortunate reality that there are many, many different ways for people to abuse others. Lundy Bancroft’s excellent book, “Why Does He Do That?” breaks down the most commonly seen kinds of abusers.

The book goes into way more detail and description of the different types, but I’ve excerpted the sections concerning the inner beliefs that drive different kinds of abusers’ behaviors. These things are pivotal when you’re trying to write an abusive character realistically.

One thing to note - abusers can fall into multiple categories, or even change categories day by day.

Shrink would like to remind y’all that not all abusers are men, and not all victims / survivors of abuse are women. This book does acknowledge this fact, and does discuss violence in same-sex relationships, by the way. 

The Demand Man

The Demand Man is highly entitled. He expects his partner’s life to revolve around meeting his needs and is angry and blaming if anything gets in the way.

  • It’s your job to do things for me, including taking care of my responsibilities if I drop the ball on them.
  • If I’m unhappy about any aspect of my life, whether it has to do with our relationship or not, it’s your fault.
  • You should not place demands on me at all. You should be grateful for whatever I choose to give.
  • I am above criticism.
  • I am a very loving and giving partner. You’re lucky to have me.

Mr. Right

Mr. Right considers himself the ultimate authority on every subject under the sun; you might call him “Mr. Always Right.” … He finds little of value in your thoughts or insights, so he seeks to empty out your head and fill it up with his jewels of brilliance.

  • You should be in awe of my intelligence and should look up to me intellectually.
  • I know better than you do, even about what’s good for you.
  • Your opinions aren’t worth listening to carefully or taking seriously.
  • The fact that you sometimes disagree with me shows how sloppy your thinking is.
  • If you would just accept that I know what’s right, our relationship would go much better. Your own life would go better, too.
  • When you disagree with me about something, no matter how respectfully or meekly, that’s mistreatment of me.
  • If I put you down for long enough, some day you’ll see.

The Water Torturer

The Water Torturer’s style proves that anger doesn’t cause abuse. He can assault his partner psychologically without even raising his voice… He gets to his partner through a slow but steady stream of low-level emotional assaults.

  • You are crazy. You fly off the handle over nothing.
  • I can easily convince other people that you’re the one who is messed up.
  • As long as I’m calm, you can’t call anything I do abusive, no matter how cruel.
  • I know exactly how to get under your skin

The Drill Sergeant

The Drill Sergeant takes controlling behavior to its extreme, running his partner’s life in every way that he can.

  • I need to control your every move or you will do it wrong.
  • I know the exact way that everything should be done.
  • You shouldn’t have anyone else —or any thing else—in your life besides me.
  • I am going to watch you like a hawk to keep you from developing strength or independence.
  • I love you more than anyone in the world, but you disgust me.

Mr. Sensitive

Mr. Sensitive …is soft-spoken, gentle, and supportive—when he isn’t being abusive. He loves the language of feelings, openly sharing his insecurities, his fears, and his emotional injuries. … Mr. Sensitive wraps himself in one of the most persuasive covers a man can have.

  • I’m against the macho men, so I couldn’t be abusive.
  • As long as I use a lot of “psychobabble,” no one is going to believe that I am mistreating you.
  • I can control you by analyzing how your mind and emotions work, and what your issues are from childhood.
  • I can get inside your head whether you want me there or not.
  • Nothing in the world is more important than my feelings.
  • Women should be grateful to me for not being like those other men.

The Player

The Player is usually good looking and often sexy…Much of his satisfaction in life comes from exploiting women and feeling like a sexual animal.

  • Women were put on this earth to have sex with men—especially me.
  • Women who want sex are too loose, and women who refuse sex are too uptight.
  • It’s not my fault that women find me irresistible.
  • It’s not fair to expect me to refuse temptation when it’s all around me; women seduce me sometimes, and I can’t help it.
  • If you act like you need anything from me, I am going to ignore you.
  • I’m in this relationship when it’s convenient for me and when I feel like it.
  • Women who want the nonsexual aspects of themselves appreciated are bitches. 
  • If you could meet my sexual needs, I wouldn’t have to turn to other women

Rambo

Rambo is aggressive with everybody, not just his partner. He gets a thrill out of the sensation of intimidating people and strives to handle all life situations by subtly or overtly creating fear.

  • Strength and aggressiveness are good; compassion and conflict resolution are bad.
  • Anything that could be even remotely associated with homosexuality, including walking away from possible violence or showing any fear or grief, has to be avoided at any cost.
  • Femaleness and femininity (which he associates with homosexuality) are inferior.
  • Women are here to serve men and be protected by them.
  • Men should never hit women, because it is unmanly to do so. However, exceptions to this rule can be made for my own partner if her behavior is bad enough.
  • Men need to keep their women in line.
  • You are a thing that belongs to me, akin to a trophy.

The Victim

The Victim appeals to a woman’s compassion and desire to feel that she can make a difference in his life.

  • Everybody has done me wrong, especially the women I’ve been involved with. Poor me.
  • When you accuse me of being abusive, you are joining the parade of people who have been cruel and unfair to me. It proves you’re just like the rest.
  • It’s justifiable for me to do to you whatever I feel you are doing to me, and even to make it quite a bit worse to make sure you get the message.
  • Women who complain of mistreatment by men, such as relationship abuse or sexual harassment, are anti-male and out for blood.
  • I’ve had it so hard that I’m not responsible for my actions.

The Terrorist

The Terrorist tends to be both highly controlling and extremely demanding. His worst aspect, however, is that he frequently reminds his partner that he could physically rip her to pieces or even kill her.

  • You have no right to defy me or leave me. Your life is in my hands.
  • Women are evil and have to be kept terrorized to prevent that evil from coming forth.
  • I would rather die than accept your right to independence.
  • The children are one of the best tools I can use to make you fearful.
  • Seeing you terrified is exciting and satisfying. 

Mentally Ill or Addicted abuser

This last category is not actually separate from the others; an abusive man of any of the aforementioned styles can also have psychiatric or substance-abuse problems, although the majority do not. Even when mental illness or addiction is a factor, it is not the cause of a man’s abuse of his partner, but it can contribute to the severity of his problem and his resistance to change.

  • I am not responsible for my actions because of my psychological or substance problems.
  • If you challenge me about my abusiveness, you are being mean to me, considering these other problems I have. It also shows that you don’t understand my other problems.
  • I’m not abusive, I’m just——— (alcoholic, drug addicted, manic-depressive, an adult child of alcoholics, or whatever his condition may be).
  • If you challenge me, it will trigger my addiction or mental illness, and you’ll be responsible for what I do.
Avatar
reblogged

Reframing relationship perspectives

Monogamy isn’t for everyone

Be honest about who you are upfront . Use what works for you

Avatar
reblogged

Reframing relationship perspectives

Monogamy isn’t for everyone

Be honest about who you are upfront . Use what works for you

You are using an unsupported browser and things might not work as intended. Please make sure you're using the latest version of Chrome, Firefox, Safari, or Edge.