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                                              I  AM  HEAVEN  SENT                                              (   because heaven couldn’t stand to keep me   )

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                                BECAUSE THESE TEND TOget around a lot faster, go ahead && LIKE / REBLOG if you’re interested with interacting with a BOOK && LORE BASED, CANON DIVERGENT JACE HERONDALE from the shadowhunters series. this blog is not show compliant && as stated, diverges a bit from canon. i absolutely love crossovers && ocs more than anything, so come say hi !

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SOMEONEcalled me  a l a b a s t e r   &&   i just wanted it to be true. i WANTED to be smooth   &&   dauntless, more BLUE SKY then COMET. the panic sets in the first time you look at yourself in the MIRROR   &&   realize you are not  B E A U T I F U L .  it happened to ME   &&   i felt like  s p a c e . i lost myself for years in the  g a p s  between STARS. my skin pockmarked, rosy, UNMYTHOLOGICAL. i wanted to be VENUS DE MILO, new   &&   astonishing under HER sculptor’s hands. i wanted to be  B E A U T I F U L .  i thought it would set me    FREE.     // ELISABETH HEWER. “UNBECOMING.”

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i  see  my  FATHER.  our  eyes  lock  &&  i  die.      DEATH  COMES  BLIND  FAST  !     as  easy,  familiar,  as  forgotten  LULLABY.      &&  suddenly,  i’m  an  ANGEL  on  the  c u t t i n g  r o o m  floor   ;   wearing  GORE,  a  BLANK  STARE,  && not  much  more.       from  the  way  i  look,  as  i’m  split  OPEN,  you  would  never  know.  i  born  was  a  baby.  my  mother  WATCHED  like  this,  on  the  floor,  her  GIRLHOOD  a  ghost  like  my  BOYHOOD  &&  now  i  am  that  ANGEL  as  she  was  that  ANGEL.  her  ghost  story  made  ME  a  ghost.  there  is  nothing  i  can  do  except  watch  as  father  OPENS  his  throat  && calls  it  love,  when  his  SWORD  rips  through  my  ribs.  when  the  FIRE  sears  my  flesh,  or  h o w e v e r  it  happens  this  time.  but  first, here’s  my  PRAYER.

THAT  WHAT  HAPPENS  TO  BOYS  LIKE  ME      ;      BORN  FROM  GHOSTS  &&  SINS               PRAY  THAT  WHEN  WE’RE  KILLED  AS  MARTYRS,    WE  GET  LOVED  LIKE  SAINTS.

REMADE JAN 16, 2017

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