WALLPAPERS PAISAGENS | DÊ LIKE!

WALLPAPERS CACTOS/CACTUS | DÊ LIKE!

hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's my number... that's wasteland baby

Bill Hader’s knife story is the funniest thing ever

I’ve seen this 5,000 times and I still laugh every single time. This and his Dateline impressions are the funniest thing that has ever happened in the history of the world.

This is actually the best intro to a porno that has ever existed

There is no way this is a porno

This is the best porno there has ever been.

The way he says “HEY WHAT THE FUCK” shaped me as a person

Forth wall reinforced by Kermit The Frog

I choose to believe.

wow this is actually an excellent little horror piece

if you have a mental illness you know exactly what’s behind that door

that took a sharp left

french recipes: if you’re not making this in paris then what’s the point. fuck you

italian recipes: use the left leg meat of a pig from one of three farms in this specific area of tuscany, or from this day my grandmother will begin manifesting physically in your house

american recipes: buy these three cans of stuff and put them in a pan congrats you cooked

chinese recipes, as handed down from mother to child: season it with a pinch of this and some of that. you want to know the exact amount? feel it in your heart. ask the stars. yell into the void. 

English recipes: boil and salt it. Okay that’s it enjoy

Greek recipes: You followed all the right steps but this isn’t quite right. I don’t know what to tell you.

Australia recipes: chuck it on the barbie

Latinx recipes: you will never make it better than your abuela, face the facts

Armenian recipes: spend eight days laboring over the stove. the food will be flavorful with the sacrifice of your sanity. no one will appreciate it.

Canadian recipes: It either needs more bacon, more maple syrup, more gravy, or an unholy combination of the three

Polish recipes: you have to toUCH THE DOUGH, FEEL THE PIEROGI IN YOUR HEART, TOUCH IT. LICK IT. SMELL IT.

Every time I see this post, I learn more about how different countries’ cuisines AND neuroses.

Indian recipes: there are 500 cuisines and that means 500 versions of this dish that has 500 spices so gl 

ashki jewish recipes: no, no. no. more onion. 

internet recipes: here is a heartwarming story about my baby sister’s third birthday that i completely made up, and a copypaste from alton brown.

Irish recipes:

i still do not understand what possessed so many well-respected actors to do the spy kids movies like

did they pay really well? did you want these beautiful, terrible movies to be a blemish on your career forever?? why

 antonio banderas did so many high-profile movies then in spy kids he looked like this

tony shalhoub has won multiple emmys but he did spy kids and

even fucking george clooney wtf

steve buscemi is pretty goofy but still

salma hayek’s pigtails in this wow 

elijah wood was the lead in a movie that’s tied for the largest number of oscars of all time and he played a character creatively named “THE GUY”

sylvester stallone is like a cultural icon and he played not one but FOUR ridiculously dressed weirdos

alan cumming is the only one i can understand 

Spy Kids is a national treasure

how dare you talk about spy kids as though it is not the most brilliant franchise ever created

My mom always guessed that the reason all of these actors did this movie is because a lot of them probably had kids at the time and wanted their kids to be able to watch their parents on screen in a wholesome silly way.

SpyKids is why all of these actors are relevant.

consider also

Lucifer cast as troubled birds

Lucifer

Chloe

Maze

Amenadiel

Linda

Ella

Dan

Trixie

Eve

Charlotte

Pierce/Cain

Mum

Malcolm

why is he sitting like a 14th century monarch

he is one

Okay so I know it’s like years late, but you know “the greatest show” from the greatest showman? How the beginning just fucking SLAPS? Then the rest just…doesn’t? WELL BOY DO I HAVE NEWS FOR YOU!!!

For king and country covered it with Spotify and the whole damn thing just GOES.

holy shit this is amazing! 

Is there anyway to get this on my device if I don’t use spotify? I use Google Play. don’t really want use 3+ music players…