ok im tired of the bullshit

wheres the queen mosquito?? if i beat her ass all the other ones die right?? how many health bars does she have?

No prob Bob

No problem Boblem

No probert Robert

big müde

Therapist: I see sadness in your eyes

Me: that my sharingan

Mansplaining protip:

When a man starts explaining a concept you already told him you understand, instead of saying “I know” over and over until you die, try one of these:

SAVAGE

teacher-zone him

© gwibumi 

“Each dot represents 5,000 hogs.” World Geography. 1948. 

untapped infinite hog supply in the ocean

Each state is lined with an impenetrable wall.of swine. We are trapped

We’ve lost canada and mexico to the hogs already

anyone else fucking LOVE BEING IN BED???

bitch im in bed right now!! how did you know!!

Same!!!

Can we talk about how laurent chased after damen to get his first kiss?

laurent: i don’t normally chase after boys but if he’s over 6 ft and 100% akielon beef a bitch might just powerwalk

this shit intense

I was rooting for dragon egg and he took a L smh

We’ll get em next time Comet.

Nigga I didnt know anything like this existed 5 minutes ago and I feel hooked now.

I like to think that at some point Ed got bored and decides to become a professor at some big name Amestrian college. 

   His specialty is a military funded class called Battle Alchemy, which he starts off by inviting any of his students to beat him in hand to hand for a conditionless passing grade (by the end of the first class, most students walk away sore and horrified).

    It takes half  the semester before they realize that Ed continues to beat them even when they use alchemy and he does not. They ask to see him use alchemy in battle. The next day, a man who looks almost the same as their professor shows up to class- he’s softspoken and polite, and the students expect a substitute lecture. Ed sits in the stands and laughs as Al proceeds to fight the entire class at once, and beat all of them. The students never ask again.

  (And sometimes, in the middle of practicals, students swear they can see the Fuhrer watching from the edge of the field.)  

   I can also see him causing a hell of a problem when it comes to conventional textbooks- 

  “This is definitely wrong.” 

  “Sir, this is the most recently updated textbook for theoretical alchemy-” 

 “Yea fuck that, I can prove that soul alchemy isn’t unviable- someone hand me some chalk, I’m about to commit a mathematical felony.”