Ursa hate, Mai hate, and Ty Lee hate all come from the idea that there are right and wrong ways to embrace or reject femininity. This is also why Suki and Toph are so often reduced to their combat skills and their canon personalities (gentleness for friends and a touch of arrogance with Suki and Toph's steady rationality and discomfort with helplessness) get taken over by fanon ones revolving around their badassery.
By interacting with this post, you understand, accept, and agree that gender is a cultural experience rather than a biological one and trans women are in fact women.
Acceptable forms of womanhood in characters are Rambunctious Tomboy, Perfect Mom, and Girlboss. Sometimes you can get away with being just the right combination of two, but you'll only ever be treated as one.
Nurturing but impatient? Called a bitch. Cold-hearted but not pretty or cunning enough to make it look cool? Called abusive. And god forbid she be sensitive but not quiet or delicate because then she's treated as just annoying, the worst thing a woman can be