"Traces"

nsfw

@watch-you-tear-yourselves-apart

"Do you want to parent with me?" She asked quietly. Regina clearly didn't seem convinced.

"It was an idea. For the future." Snow said with a shrug. "We are not ready yet. Neither of us."

She nodded. She was still sad that Snow wasn't ready to forgive her.

"I want a future with you Regina. Keep that in mind." Snow said quietly. "You don't hide your feelings all that well."

"I just ... I guess I thought us working together on the queen meant we were moving past it." She said honestly.

"That's why she's here." Snow said softly. "So we can work through our issues without blowing up on each other. I will forgive you. I made that choice already."

Regina leaned her head against Snow. Still it was clear that this hanging over her was eating at her alot.

Snow knew she she gave up power by telling Regina she had forgiven her.

"Stay the night in my bedroom."

She smiled a little. "I would like that."

That night when they slept with each other Snow dominated her as always but was so very gentle with her aftwards. Both were still breathing heavily as Snow put her blanket over them. Pulling her close.

The closer they became the stronger Snows magic seem to become.

"I miss having a family." Snow said once the lights were out.

Regina had not simply submitted to the domination but she didn't seem to mind terribly much when Snow succeeded.

"I don't know what having a family really means." Regina admitted in the dark.

"I don't know what having a family without a mortal enemy means." Snow said dryly.

"How close were you with your crew?

"I was very close. I think they're the closest I ever had to a family. They're probably wondering where I am." She had contact with them before Snow took her.

"When we're ready we can add them to our family." Snow didn't want them anywhere close right now but she was confident to have enough control over Regina at some point to do have them in their life.

"What are your voices telling you now?" she asked as she snuggled up to her.

"They are exhausting." Snow admitted. "It's hard to let go of the idea that you're not a threat anymore.

"Should I let go of the idea that you are a threat?" She asked quietly.

"I want you to take down the statues." The ones to her defeat.

"That will depend on your behavior my love." Snow said softly stroking her hair.

"Alright. I'll take them down."

"What do you want me to behave like?" She asked finally.

"You're mine." Snow said simply

"That's a statement yes."

"Traces"

nsfw

@watch-you-tear-yourselves-apart

"Do you want to parent with me?" She asked quietly. Regina clearly didn't seem convinced.

"It was an idea. For the future." Snow said with a shrug. "We are not ready yet. Neither of us."

She nodded. She was still sad that Snow wasn't ready to forgive her.

"I want a future with you Regina. Keep that in mind." Snow said quietly. "You don't hide your feelings all that well."

"I just ... I guess I thought us working together on the queen meant we were moving past it." She said honestly.

"That's why she's here." Snow said softly. "So we can work through our issues without blowing up on each other. I will forgive you. I made that choice already."

Regina leaned her head against Snow. Still it was clear that this hanging over her was eating at her alot.

Snow knew she she gave up power by telling Regina she had forgiven her.

"Stay the night in my bedroom."

She smiled a little. "I would like that."

That night when they slept with each other Snow dominated her as always but was so very gentle with her aftwards. Both were still breathing heavily as Snow put her blanket over them. Pulling her close.

The closer they became the stronger Snows magic seem to become.

"I miss having a family." Snow said once the lights were out.

Regina had not simply submitted to the domination but she didn't seem to mind terribly much when Snow succeeded.

"I don't know what having a family really means." Regina admitted in the dark.

"I don't know what having a family without a mortal enemy means." Snow said dryly.

"How close were you with your crew?

"I was very close. I think they're the closest I ever had to a family. They're probably wondering where I am." She had contact with them before Snow took her.

"When we're ready we can add them to our family." Snow didn't want them anywhere close right now but she was confident to have enough control over Regina at some point to do have them in their life.

"What are your voices telling you now?" she asked as she snuggled up to her.

"They are exhausting." Snow admitted. "It's hard to let go of the idea that you're not a threat anymore.

"Should I let go of the idea that you are a threat?" She asked quietly.

"I want you to take down the statues." The ones to her defeat.

"Traces"

nsfw

@watch-you-tear-yourselves-apart

"Do you want to parent with me?" She asked quietly. Regina clearly didn't seem convinced.

"It was an idea. For the future." Snow said with a shrug. "We are not ready yet. Neither of us."

She nodded. She was still sad that Snow wasn't ready to forgive her.

"I want a future with you Regina. Keep that in mind." Snow said quietly. "You don't hide your feelings all that well."

"I just ... I guess I thought us working together on the queen meant we were moving past it." She said honestly.

"That's why she's here." Snow said softly. "So we can work through our issues without blowing up on each other. I will forgive you. I made that choice already."

Regina leaned her head against Snow. Still it was clear that this hanging over her was eating at her alot.

Snow knew she she gave up power by telling Regina she had forgiven her.

"Stay the night in my bedroom."

She smiled a little. "I would like that."

That night when they slept with each other Snow dominated her as always but was so very gentle with her aftwards. Both were still breathing heavily as Snow put her blanket over them. Pulling her close.

The closer they became the stronger Snows magic seem to become.

"I miss having a family." Snow said once the lights were out.

Regina had not simply submitted to the domination but she didn't seem to mind terribly much when Snow succeeded.

"I don't know what having a family really means." Regina admitted in the dark.

"I don't know what having a family without a mortal enemy means." Snow said dryly.

"How close were you with your crew?

"I was very close. I think they're the closest I ever had to a family. They're probably wondering where I am." She had contact with them before Snow took her.

"When we're ready we can add them to our family." Snow didn't want them anywhere close right now but she was confident to have enough control over Regina at some point to do have them in their life.

"What are your voices telling you now?" she asked as she snuggled up to her.

"Traces"

nsfw

@watch-you-tear-yourselves-apart

"Do you want to parent with me?" She asked quietly. Regina clearly didn't seem convinced.

"It was an idea. For the future." Snow said with a shrug. "We are not ready yet. Neither of us."

She nodded. She was still sad that Snow wasn't ready to forgive her.

"I want a future with you Regina. Keep that in mind." Snow said quietly. "You don't hide your feelings all that well."

"I just ... I guess I thought us working together on the queen meant we were moving past it." She said honestly.

"That's why she's here." Snow said softly. "So we can work through our issues without blowing up on each other. I will forgive you. I made that choice already."

Regina leaned her head against Snow. Still it was clear that this hanging over her was eating at her alot.

Snow knew she she gave up power by telling Regina she had forgiven her.

"Stay the night in my bedroom."

She smiled a little. "I would like that."

That night when they slept with each other Snow dominated her as always but was so very gentle with her aftwards. Both were still breathing heavily as Snow put her blanket over them. Pulling her close.

The closer they became the stronger Snows magic seem to become.

"I miss having a family." Snow said once the lights were out.

Regina had not simply submitted to the domination but she didn't seem to mind terribly much when Snow succeeded.

"I don't know what having a family really means." Regina admitted in the dark.

"I don't know what having a family without a mortal enemy means." Snow said dryly.

"How close were you with your crew?

"I was very close. I think they're the closest I ever had to a family. They're probably wondering where I am." She had contact with them before Snow took her.

"Traces"

nsfw

@watch-you-tear-yourselves-apart

"Do you want to parent with me?" She asked quietly. Regina clearly didn't seem convinced.

"It was an idea. For the future." Snow said with a shrug. "We are not ready yet. Neither of us."

She nodded. She was still sad that Snow wasn't ready to forgive her.

"I want a future with you Regina. Keep that in mind." Snow said quietly. "You don't hide your feelings all that well."

"I just ... I guess I thought us working together on the queen meant we were moving past it." She said honestly.

"That's why she's here." Snow said softly. "So we can work through our issues without blowing up on each other. I will forgive you. I made that choice already."

Regina leaned her head against Snow. Still it was clear that this hanging over her was eating at her alot.

Snow knew she she gave up power by telling Regina she had forgiven her.

"Stay the night in my bedroom."

She smiled a little. "I would like that."

That night when they slept with each other Snow dominated her as always but was so very gentle with her aftwards. Both were still breathing heavily as Snow put her blanket over them. Pulling her close.

The closer they became the stronger Snows magic seem to become.

"I miss having a family." Snow said once the lights were out.

Regina had not simply submitted to the domination but she didn't seem to mind terribly much when Snow succeeded.

"I don't know what having a family really means." Regina admitted in the dark.

"Traces"

nsfw

@watch-you-tear-yourselves-apart

"Do you want to parent with me?" She asked quietly. Regina clearly didn't seem convinced.

"It was an idea. For the future." Snow said with a shrug. "We are not ready yet. Neither of us."

She nodded. She was still sad that Snow wasn't ready to forgive her.

"I want a future with you Regina. Keep that in mind." Snow said quietly. "You don't hide your feelings all that well."

"I just ... I guess I thought us working together on the queen meant we were moving past it." She said honestly.

"That's why she's here." Snow said softly. "So we can work through our issues without blowing up on each other. I will forgive you. I made that choice already."

Regina leaned her head against Snow. Still it was clear that this hanging over her was eating at her alot.

Snow knew she she gave up power by telling Regina she had forgiven her.

"Stay the night in my bedroom."

She smiled a little. "I would like that."

"Traces"

nsfw

@watch-you-tear-yourselves-apart

"Do you want to parent with me?" She asked quietly. Regina clearly didn't seem convinced.

"It was an idea. For the future." Snow said with a shrug. "We are not ready yet. Neither of us."

She nodded. She was still sad that Snow wasn't ready to forgive her.

"I want a future with you Regina. Keep that in mind." Snow said quietly. "You don't hide your feelings all that well."

"I just ... I guess I thought us working together on the queen meant we were moving past it." She said honestly.

"That's why she's here." Snow said softly. "So we can work through our issues without blowing up on each other. I will forgive you. I made that choice already."

Regina leaned her head against Snow. Still it was clear that this hanging over her was eating at her alot.

"Traces"

nsfw

@watch-you-tear-yourselves-apart

"Do you want to parent with me?" She asked quietly. Regina clearly didn't seem convinced.

"It was an idea. For the future." Snow said with a shrug. "We are not ready yet. Neither of us."

She nodded. She was still sad that Snow wasn't ready to forgive her.

"I want a future with you Regina. Keep that in mind." Snow said quietly. "You don't hide your feelings all that well."

"I just ... I guess I thought us working together on the queen meant we were moving past it." She said honestly.

"Traces"

nsfw

@watch-you-tear-yourselves-apart

"Do you want to parent with me?" She asked quietly. Regina clearly didn't seem convinced.

"It was an idea. For the future." Snow said with a shrug. "We are not ready yet. Neither of us."

She nodded. She was still sad that Snow wasn't ready to forgive her.

"Traces"

nsfw

@watch-you-tear-yourselves-apart

"If it were me? It's a lie. Her... she seems obsessed with being a good girl so it's probably the truth."

She relaxed enjoying her drink.

"She really is obsessed with it isn't she? I dont think even I tried so hard to be good." Snow said dryly. Playing with Regina's hair.

"Do we think that's a bad thing for a high queen?" Someone over other kings and queens." She didn't move away from Snow playing with her hair.

"No." Snow shook her head. "It will likely be an advantage for us." Snow looked at her. "You can't cosplay her forever. It's a way out. I'm just not sure I made a deep enough impression so far."

Snow didn't think she could break the queen any time soon but she wanted to get under her skin.

"I can't. I'm starting to lay ground work to tell people I need to get away for two weeks and take a break." Snow hadn't suggested that. "I know that's not a lot of time but I think I've got about two weeks of this play acting in me. Do you think you can make an impression on her with a month?"

"I see." Snow nodded. "I didn't suggest that." She didn't seem upset but rather amused.

"A month should be enough time. I won't use my other magic but just knowing I can changed the power balance."

She nodded. "I know you want to explore... I just want you to be careful, my love." She reached out to stroke her face.

"I will." Snow leant into the touch. As long as Regina didn't challenge her position she was almost sweet with her.

"How strong is her position within the kingdom?"

"Extremely. I almost don't know how to react to this much deference and affection." She said honestly.

She did smile at Snow leaning into her.

"Then keeping her as an ally will be the best way forward." Which was something Snow preferred anyway.

"You were right about her being attracted to me. She brought up sex."

"Well you are dead sexy." She smirked.

Snow grinned. "Still feels strange to hear you say it." She leant in to kiss her.

"Is that more strange than hearing me say I love you?"

She tilted her head after the kiss.

"A little." Snow said softly. "Most would argue I'm not your type." She grinned. "I really enjoy the queen but I kept thinking about my Regina." She gently touched the collar. "I know you hate it but this makes me feel so much closer to you.

"it's not my favorite thing." She confirmed. "But I enjoy having you." And she was no longer prevented from walking around this estate. "I still miss my horses."

"You've been a good girl." Snow smiled at her. "Go and visit your horses. Whenever you want." Snow looked into her eyes. "I know you won't disappoint me.

She smiled. "Thank you."

She bowed her head acknowledging the statement.

Snow understood the only way to truly have control was to give Regina freedom.

"I want to sleep with her." Snow said simply. "But I also want you to know you're the one I want. Not her.

Regina paused. "Talk to me about it." She wanted to hear Snow's feelings about it.

"I'm obviously attracted to her." She was still a version of Regina. "She didn't care or think enough about me to be careful with my heart. She said she accidentally crushed it in frustration." Snow was actually quite angry about that.

"It feels good thinking about tying her down and making her beg so she can come." Snow rarely talked about sex out loud. "I'm angry.

"She's an idiot for admitting that to you." She shook her head. "She must still think she can connect to you like her own Snow. They're... close."

"She is." Snow agreed.

"They are but nothing happened between them." Snow tilted her head. "And it's breaking her heart even if she'd never admit it

"Well the princess' marriage is sickeningly sweet so much that I think even you would say it's too much." She pointed out gently.

"I try to avoid them together." Snow said simply. "Her David is different than mine."

Regina touched her face. "I wont tell you I'm sorry he destroyed himself for hating me. I won."

Some time ago this would have made Snow angry. Not anymore. "He made his choice." She still missed him though.

"I think he knew that I loved you. Perhaps even before I did.

"I'm glad her stupidity brought you to my arms." She admitted.

"I said something similar today." Snow chuckled. "But it was almost shockingly stupid. I liked her more when I thought she thought I wasn't real."

Regina tilted her head, "She wouldn't have been that stupid if she thought you were real, Snow."

"Oh." Snow said simply. "Do you think she still thinks that?

"I doubt it. I'm sure you've educated her on how very real you are."

"That I did. The whipping was fun." Snow smirked. "So was her face when I tied her up."

"I'm glad you have someone to take that up with." She kissed her forehead.

"Seems you're on my good side now." Snow grinned but there was an underlying threat.

"You forgave me easier than I thought..." Regina admitted quietly.

Snow looked at her for a long time.

"Don't mistake my kindness for forgivness Regina." Snow said quietly.

Both Regina's stomach and her face sank.

"You're trying and I appreciate that." Snow touched her face. "But a bit of pain and submission won't make my pain go away this quickly.

Regina didn't say anything. It's not like she had anything she could say.

Snow leant in to kiss her. "I will forgive you. Just not yet." She pulled her into her arms.

She leaned her head against Snow's chest.

"Did you miss being queen?"

"Some parts of it. The wine is better." She teased her.

"An important aspect." Snow chuckled.

"The Queen said she's impressed that I didn't go insane."

"It's impressive." She agreed with a smile.

"What did your voices tell you?"

"To punish the world for not caring about me." She said quietly.

"Sometimes I agree. I so wish the world would have treated you kinder." Snow said softly playing with her hair.

"Mine tells me not to trust you or Regina. That loving you will only bring pain and to get as much power as I can to protect myself."

"It's... not an unreasonable fear." Regina admitted. She didn't deny Snow's pain.

"No, it's not." Snow said quietly.

"Did you ever consider surrendering ?"

"I came into one of your ports once. About 3 years before your death." She paused. "There was a big stone statue dedicated to my defeat. My banners were under the feat of you and your king."

"David's idea." Snow said quietly. "Defeating you wasn't a triumph for me. It just changed what I was anxious about." Snow shook her head. "The Queen said I turned into exactly the kind of Queen she though I would without having you in my life. Cruel and self centered.

"You love your daughter but she's not who you'd want her to be is she?" She asked almost in a change of subject. But it wasn't."

Snow didn't answer for a long time.

"No, she isn't." Snow said eventually.

"The rumor about your daughter ..." Regina said carefully. "Was that you never let her experience any hardship. That you loved her so much she never grew up."

She looked at her gently. "Perhaps you are lucky in a way that now you get to know your adult daughter and you don't have to watch her stumble through that pain."

"I may have been a bit overprotective."Snow admitted.

"I thought so many times dying would be easier than keep on living once my father had died. I didn't want her to go through any of it." Snow tilted her head. "This Emma carries a lot of pain with her.

"I had wanted it to be swift for you. You were never supposed to be hunted like I ended up doing. That... wasn't my intention."

The huntsman was supposed to be an assassing after all.

"You were a very powerful witch Regina. I was a stupid princess." Snow said quietly. The question being...why didn't she catch her earlier anyway?

"I never thought about why I wasn't just using my magic to kill you." She said honestly.

"You always loved me." Snow said with a smirk.

"I did." She admitted without reservation.

"You're an idiot you know that right?" Snow said dryly stroking her hair. "I would have done anything for you at the age I was when my father died. Anything.

"You understand that doesn't matter for how much pain I was in, right?" She asked gently. Between Daniel, and Rumple, and your father, and ... the children I lost..."

"You wouldn't have been alone." Snow said quietly.

"I didn't know before. About the babies."

"It was made very clear to me that it was my fault. That your father had proven virility." She said simply

"It probably would have helped if he had stopped hurting you while you were pregnant ." Snow said quietly. Those memories had almost destroyed her.

"I lost one." She said after a while.

Her face showed heart break for Snow. "I'm sorry, Snow."

"Thank you." Snow said softly. "I'm sorry too. I would have loved to have a sibling." She hesitated for a moment. "Did you want them? I felt like you did."

"I desperately wanted them, Snow." She paused. "I always wanted to be a mother but you weren't really someone I could have mothered. I think our current relationship says as much."

"No, we never had that kind of relationship. You were too young." Snow said quietly.

"Did you ever consider to adopt?"

"I... don't think I would have been good for a child." Regina said sadly.

"The Queen was." Snow pointed out.

"I considered adopting one once the queen freed me."

"Snow... look at my heart." Regina said quietly. "I'm a terrible person."

"Traces"

nsfw

@watch-you-tear-yourselves-apart

"If it were me? It's a lie. Her... she seems obsessed with being a good girl so it's probably the truth."

She relaxed enjoying her drink.

"She really is obsessed with it isn't she? I dont think even I tried so hard to be good." Snow said dryly. Playing with Regina's hair.

"Do we think that's a bad thing for a high queen?" Someone over other kings and queens." She didn't move away from Snow playing with her hair.

"No." Snow shook her head. "It will likely be an advantage for us." Snow looked at her. "You can't cosplay her forever. It's a way out. I'm just not sure I made a deep enough impression so far."

Snow didn't think she could break the queen any time soon but she wanted to get under her skin.

"I can't. I'm starting to lay ground work to tell people I need to get away for two weeks and take a break." Snow hadn't suggested that. "I know that's not a lot of time but I think I've got about two weeks of this play acting in me. Do you think you can make an impression on her with a month?"

"I see." Snow nodded. "I didn't suggest that." She didn't seem upset but rather amused.

"A month should be enough time. I won't use my other magic but just knowing I can changed the power balance."

She nodded. "I know you want to explore... I just want you to be careful, my love." She reached out to stroke her face.

"I will." Snow leant into the touch. As long as Regina didn't challenge her position she was almost sweet with her.

"How strong is her position within the kingdom?"

"Extremely. I almost don't know how to react to this much deference and affection." She said honestly.

She did smile at Snow leaning into her.

"Then keeping her as an ally will be the best way forward." Which was something Snow preferred anyway.

"You were right about her being attracted to me. She brought up sex."

"Well you are dead sexy." She smirked.

Snow grinned. "Still feels strange to hear you say it." She leant in to kiss her.

"Is that more strange than hearing me say I love you?"

She tilted her head after the kiss.

"A little." Snow said softly. "Most would argue I'm not your type." She grinned. "I really enjoy the queen but I kept thinking about my Regina." She gently touched the collar. "I know you hate it but this makes me feel so much closer to you.

"it's not my favorite thing." She confirmed. "But I enjoy having you." And she was no longer prevented from walking around this estate. "I still miss my horses."

"You've been a good girl." Snow smiled at her. "Go and visit your horses. Whenever you want." Snow looked into her eyes. "I know you won't disappoint me.

She smiled. "Thank you."

She bowed her head acknowledging the statement.

Snow understood the only way to truly have control was to give Regina freedom.

"I want to sleep with her." Snow said simply. "But I also want you to know you're the one I want. Not her.

Regina paused. "Talk to me about it." She wanted to hear Snow's feelings about it.

"I'm obviously attracted to her." She was still a version of Regina. "She didn't care or think enough about me to be careful with my heart. She said she accidentally crushed it in frustration." Snow was actually quite angry about that.

"It feels good thinking about tying her down and making her beg so she can come." Snow rarely talked about sex out loud. "I'm angry.

"She's an idiot for admitting that to you." She shook her head. "She must still think she can connect to you like her own Snow. They're... close."

"She is." Snow agreed.

"They are but nothing happened between them." Snow tilted her head. "And it's breaking her heart even if she'd never admit it

"Well the princess' marriage is sickeningly sweet so much that I think even you would say it's too much." She pointed out gently.

"I try to avoid them together." Snow said simply. "Her David is different than mine."

Regina touched her face. "I wont tell you I'm sorry he destroyed himself for hating me. I won."

Some time ago this would have made Snow angry. Not anymore. "He made his choice." She still missed him though.

"I think he knew that I loved you. Perhaps even before I did.

"I'm glad her stupidity brought you to my arms." She admitted.

"I said something similar today." Snow chuckled. "But it was almost shockingly stupid. I liked her more when I thought she thought I wasn't real."

Regina tilted her head, "She wouldn't have been that stupid if she thought you were real, Snow."

"Oh." Snow said simply. "Do you think she still thinks that?

"I doubt it. I'm sure you've educated her on how very real you are."

"That I did. The whipping was fun." Snow smirked. "So was her face when I tied her up."

"I'm glad you have someone to take that up with." She kissed her forehead.

"Seems you're on my good side now." Snow grinned but there was an underlying threat.

"You forgave me easier than I thought..." Regina admitted quietly.

Snow looked at her for a long time.

"Don't mistake my kindness for forgivness Regina." Snow said quietly.

Both Regina's stomach and her face sank.

"You're trying and I appreciate that." Snow touched her face. "But a bit of pain and submission won't make my pain go away this quickly.

Regina didn't say anything. It's not like she had anything she could say.

Snow leant in to kiss her. "I will forgive you. Just not yet." She pulled her into her arms.

She leaned her head against Snow's chest.

"Did you miss being queen?"

"Some parts of it. The wine is better." She teased her.

"An important aspect." Snow chuckled.

"The Queen said she's impressed that I didn't go insane."

"It's impressive." She agreed with a smile.

"What did your voices tell you?"

"To punish the world for not caring about me." She said quietly.

"Sometimes I agree. I so wish the world would have treated you kinder." Snow said softly playing with her hair.

"Mine tells me not to trust you or Regina. That loving you will only bring pain and to get as much power as I can to protect myself."

"It's... not an unreasonable fear." Regina admitted. She didn't deny Snow's pain.

"No, it's not." Snow said quietly.

"Did you ever consider surrendering ?"

"I came into one of your ports once. About 3 years before your death." She paused. "There was a big stone statue dedicated to my defeat. My banners were under the feat of you and your king."

"David's idea." Snow said quietly. "Defeating you wasn't a triumph for me. It just changed what I was anxious about." Snow shook her head. "The Queen said I turned into exactly the kind of Queen she though I would without having you in my life. Cruel and self centered.

"You love your daughter but she's not who you'd want her to be is she?" She asked almost in a change of subject. But it wasn't."

Snow didn't answer for a long time.

"No, she isn't." Snow said eventually.

"The rumor about your daughter ..." Regina said carefully. "Was that you never let her experience any hardship. That you loved her so much she never grew up."

She looked at her gently. "Perhaps you are lucky in a way that now you get to know your adult daughter and you don't have to watch her stumble through that pain."

"I may have been a bit overprotective."Snow admitted.

"I thought so many times dying would be easier than keep on living once my father had died. I didn't want her to go through any of it." Snow tilted her head. "This Emma carries a lot of pain with her.