hello stranger

Rest easy, king.

yes i know heartstopper is "cringe" and yes I know you think it's not that deep but you've endured years of cringe oversexualized shows about high schoolers where the gays are delegated to sub plots I'm sure a few hours of queer people being safe and happy and loved won't kill you so please shut the fuck up

no matter how terrible my day is. i can always end my day in bed imagining fictional characters making out sloppy style and fucking raw. and that's beautiful. there's some good in this world mister frodo and it's worth fighting for

call me a guy who just caught a fish that's too small and abides by the local fishing regulations on minimum size limit

the way i throw it back.

“it’s ok to shave if you want to” no it’s never ok

What about shaving my head??????

shaving your head is always moral and good. get more bald

everyone needs to stop doing fan edits trying to recreate the theatrical cut and updating the special effects and find the 03 Chilean cut immediately

Ok. Hang on. I had to search "Star Wars cerveza Cristal" to see if it was real and

I'm speechless.

people at the grocery store sometimes do a visible double-take about how many vegetables I'm buying. they look at me probably thinking wow she's so healthy! it's ok that she's also buying donuts! she's earned them!

you fools. all the produce is for my pet pig. I'm eating donuts for dinner.

an older woman actually stopped me once and told me I must be a great cook because I was just throwing random vegetables in my cart based on price. she was like "gosh! I would need a recipe to know what to do with all of those!"

i do have a recipe. it's very simple:

ingredients: vegetable

step 1: throw it on the ground.

this is my son. btw.

@thatspectacularpigeon

Certified Library Post

Further new discoveries have been made on my theory.

passenger princess? No, I’m the passenger knight. I’ve sworn an oath of homoerotic loyalty to the driver and will protect them until my last breath. I will carry out her road rage. I’m why the passenger seat is called shotgun

i re-watched dead poets society a little more than usual this month, and now, all im seeing is sad sad angsty angst posts

and yes, i am crying

Another day another what the fuck

James is the kind of person who says 'don't mind if I do' before taking a cookie