Is this thing on?

source

came home drunk last night and got way too excited to see my cat

Bees win

I hate being a customer I hate doing that to someone

Worst part of living with animals is the night time sloppy licking cleaning noises I'm sorry but I cannot sleep . Please fhcking stop please please olease

they should invent a tummy for girls that doesn’t hurt

if it’s a girl we’re naming her embezzlement ☺️ bezzie for short. fraud if it’s a boy

Me entering any museum: man I’m so excited to learn all the things

Also me: GIFT SHOP GIFT SHOP GIFT SHOP

There are two dragons inside of you. One hoards knowledge and the other hoards trinkets. They’re both very excited when you bring them to a museum

by astrailor_jp

drinking red wine straight from the source (jesus’ side wound)

#see you just don’t get this on twitter

Birdy tippy tap chorus.

new york,

I post this every year but it’s worth it to remind myself to plant flowers, in the garden and in my mind and whenever I get a chance, in the hearts of others.