Rating Disney Horse Designs
Cyril Proudbottom (The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad) 2/10 His vacant eyes and grotesque proportions disturb me
The Headless Horseman’s Horse (The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad) 7/10 Stunning. Very dramatic. Powerful look.
Major (Cinderella) 4/10 Cyril Proudbottom’s more distinguished cousin.
Samson (Sleeping Beauty) 3/10 There’s something not right about his face. I don’t trust him.
Captain (One Hundred and One Dalmatians- movie) 5/10 A solid design. Friend shaped.
Captain (I don’t know- some 101 Dalmatians tv show it looks like) -30/10 Kill it now before it destroys us all.
Frou-Frou (Aristocats) 7/10 A perfect genteel lady. Loses points for inconsistency in the animation.
Philippe (Beauty and the Beast) 8/10 I’d trust this horse with my life
Achilles (The Hunchback of Notre Dame) 6/10 Respectable. Handsome.
Snowball (The Hunchback of Notre Dame) 10/10 The DRAMA. The expression somewhere between “evil” and “hasn’t slept in 4 days”. The HAIR. Perfection. Exactly the type of horse I’ll ride when I turn evil.
Pegasus (Hercules) 6/10 A fun design, lot’s of personality. But kinda gives off Frat Boy energy.
Baby Pegasus (Hercules) 11/10 I’d die for him.
Khan (Mulan) 10/10 Look at those absurd proportions– the tiny legs and the huge barrel chest- amazing.
Bullseye (Toy Story 2-4) 4/10 Is he cute? yes. But as someone who has owned many toy horses in her life, this is not a toy horse I would be pleased with.
This Bullseye Toy I found looking for a movie picture of Bullseye -100/10 This thing IS cursed and we will probably all die for having seen it. But I’m taking you all down with me.
Buck (Home on the Range) 2/10 No matter what picture, no matter what expression, you look at this horse and just KNOW he would be so unpleasant to talk to.
Blessedly, there is no horse in Chicken Little.
Destiny (Enchanted) 5/10 This is a Barbie horse and I swear I owned it.
Maximus (Tangled) 7/10 A good design but too much dogness.
Angus (Brave) 15/10 Everything that’s good in a horse.
Sitron (Frozen) 11/10 He deserves so much better than Hans. Look at his kind eyes. This is a horse that will treat you right. This horse is the anti-Hans.
Nokk (Frozen 2) 20/10 WATER HORSE WATER HORSE WATER HORSE WATER HORSE!
This Horse I Assume Bruno Stole (Encanto) 9/10 He’s only there very briefly and I can’t even find a decent picture but he’s a very nice horse.
I had to look this up. I HAD TO. And Frollo’s horse IS named Snowball.
WHAT. THE. ACTUAL. FUCK.
