@erudiculous-blog / erudiculous-blog.tumblr.com
New blog is @scriballistic ! It bothered me how disorganized this account was, so I moved. :) Old URL but brand new account!
Pls follow! I’ll probably do Steven Universe requests or something idk. And with the new Steven bomb I’ll probably be drawing more SU stuff in general!
New blog is @scriballistic ! It bothered me how disorganized this account was, so I moved. :) Old URL but brand new account!
Pls follow! I’ll probably do Steven Universe requests or something idk. And with the new Steven bomb I’ll probably be drawing more SU stuff in general!
The trip to Earth must have been fun for Topaz
-being called “anorexic” when in reality, you won’t eat because you’re paranoid that there are bugs/poison in your food
-always looking over your shoulder
-missing school/skipping school because of psychotic episodes in the middle of the night
-scratches all over from psychotic episodes
-bruises everywhere from psychotic episodes
-not being able to differentiate reality from fiction (i.e. Did {insert name} actually say that to me or was it my imagination?)
-not being able to speak or do anything but point and make alarming noises while triggered
-banging your hands on things when you’re nervous
-constant nail-biting
-sleepless nights/nights sleeping with a parent/sibling because of how scared you are
-constantly jerking your head to look somewhere because you see movement in the corner of your eyes but nothing is there
-every horror movie is now nightmare/hallucination/paranoia bait
I feel like everywhere on tumblr is all “pro psychosis” and “psychosis is cute” or whatever, and I just wanted to share what psychosis is really like
So. Mother’s Day is Sunday. There are a million posts out there about showing your appreciation for your mother and it can make a lot of people with abusive moms feel guilty.
So this is specifically for the people dealing with that guilt: it’s ok to Not buy her a gift, and it’s also ok to go out and buy something super nice for her. Your health comes first, and whichever option helps YOU feel best, then do it.
It’s ok if you cringe when/if she thanks you, if she hugs you and tells you she loves you. That sense of wrongness is hard to deal with, and I’m sorry you have to be one to bear it.
I’m sorry there’s so much mothers day shit out there. I’m sorry it’s all over facebook where she posts with her friends and they all tell her she’s a wonderful mom.
You deserve better. This weekend will be over soon.
Keep yourself safe the best way you can.
an important reminder
mood
take a fucking sip, birds
My naim is byrd and wen i drink i stik my hed beneeth a sink or faucet tapp whitch maykes a drip i preen my fethers i take a sip
I BLESS THE RAINS DOWN IN
It looks how the song sounds
when you go from a bad situation into a better one you may collapse exhausted and unsure what to do and full of grief, you may need time to regain the ability to do things as yourself or motivated by anything other than terror, you may need time to process or mourn or fall apart in ways you could not before,
and people may use this as proof that the old situation was better for you, proof that you need to go back, and it is not proof that it was better for you or proof that you need to go back
!!!
It’s so incredibly common to “fall apart” when you’re finally safe. You no longer need to stay so tightly coiled in on yourself, you can finally leave survival mode and process your trauma. You’re not holding yourself up by sheer terror anymore and suddenly the damage that terror has done to you becomes immediate and obvious.
This is so important. Don’t go back. Things are already getting better, even if it doesn’t feel that way.
This is a documented phenomenon with abuse in particular. I’ve had a number of people ask me why they’re falling apart now after they’ve moved into a safer home, or they’re in a less dangerous area, or they’ve left an exploitative job, or they’re in a healthy relationship for the first time. Generally, it’s because they made that positive change.
When we’re still in the midst of crisis, we’re often too overloaded and physically/emotionally unsafe to really feel or process anything. So for most of us, everything gets pushed down/repressed/dissociated until later, when we’re safe and supported. The threshold of safety at which processing begins to occur varies from person to person. And the mental calculations used to determine “safety” usually happen on an unconscious level. Very few of us have the conscious thought “I’m safe now, so I can process what happened to me.” Instead, the subconscious realizes some level of safety has been achieved, and so it just dumps a load of suppressed stuff.
Sometimes, it’s contrast to past experiences that makes us realize something was traumatic at all. In such cases, it’s not that we’ve reached a level of safety and can thus begin to process, it’s that we finally have a basis for comparison to know that what went before was unacceptable.
People need to realize that there’s a difference between straight people and Straight People™
Straight person: Hey, you got a new haircut. Looks really good.
Straight Person™: No homo, but your haircut looks good on you.
In case you were confused 👌
Just like how there are white people who are gay and then there are the White Gays
White people who are gay: “I’m gay.”
White Gays: “I can’t believe I got accused of racism after calling that person a racial slur! I mean, I know what racism looks like because I’ve been discriminated for my sexuality. How is me being racist even possible? I’M GAY!”
Lmao all the angry White and Straight people in the comments, keep reblogging
neurotypical: i don’t have any mental illnesses or disorders Neurotypical™: Happiness is a choice!! ✨✨Have you tried yoga? Drink more water and eat kale ✨✨
cis person: i identify completely as my assigned gender Cis Person™: It doesn’t matter what you identify as, cause you still have Female Genitals! I’m not being offensive!! Read a book on Human Biology! 🚹🚺
men: I identify as male.
Men™: feminazis ruin everything, get back in the kitchen and make me a sandwich bitch
atheists: I don’t believe in god or identify with a religion
Atheists™: Don’t fucking talk to me if you believe in God. Open your closed-fucking-minds!! (usually targeted towards Christians)
nice guys: hey I know when not to invade someone’s space and I totally respect boundaries
Nice Guys™: IVE BEEN YOUR FRIEND FOR A MONTH AND NOW YOURE TELLING ME YOU DONT WANT TO FUCK ME ???? WHAT IS THE POINT OF WOMEN IF YOURE NOT HAVING SEX WITH ME?
this post got all kinds of better since I last saw it
This post is perfection across the board.
feminist: I believe in equality for everything between the sexes
Feminist™: ALL MEN ARE ASSHOLES AND SHOULD DIE! WE DONT NEED ANY OF THEM ANYWAYS AND THEY NEVER DO ANYTHING GOOD FOR US!!
Christian: I believe in God and his son Jesus
Christian™: We must Obey Bible In Everything and Take It Literally and if you don’t do it you’re Going To Hell! I’m praying for you to find God and have your sins Forgiven! Other religions are from Satan and So Is Atheism!
tfw you see someone’s art style so good you just
I’ve been keeping my eye on the synesthesia tag for a long time. And I’m thinking more and more about how I want to talk about my own synesthesia. Like, I really do. For some weird reason I usually get shy about the idea of discussing it a lot, like I’m talking too much about myself or something. Even though in the back of my head I really really want to. So you know what? Nobody has to listen, but I want to share with whoever will.
Send me some words or names, and I’ll tell you what flavors and textures they bring to mind. I have lexical-gustatory synesthesia, and about 90% of the words and names I hear bring to mind very specific tastes. So, yeah, I’m tasting all these words as I type them. And it is so freaking satisfying, perhaps almost therapeutic, to be able to perfectly describe them.
Example. One of my favorite words is brilliant. It is the flavor of a chunk of pineapple in its entirety. Sour sweet pulpy juiciness, plus that slightly bitter crunchy bit at the end (that part must come from the “nt” ending, which I know because billion has the same flavor minus the bitter crunchy bit).
Okay now I feel ridiculous after typing all of this. I guess the reason it’s hard to talk about this is that I know nobody fully, like, gets it. :/ But I’m going to post this anyway, because I want people to send words and names. I love describing their tastes. It fulfills me like nothing else.
I know this post is from almost a year ago but I’m reblogging because I want to share more flavors! Please send words and names! :)
Its like cuddling with very big cat, soft and warm ; v ;
Hey if you see this status please send me fun SU thoughts/questions/headcanons?? On anon or not. Like your own headcanons, or asking me what I think about something.
