Everything is Happening All the Time

for like a decade I kept getting the advice of "don't ruminate" but also "sit with your emotions" and I was like What The Fuck Does That Even Mean. until someone finally explained it in a way that makes sense:

so there's the emotional part of your brain ("I'm embarrased") and then there's the storytelling part ("all my friends hate me and I'm a piece of shit"). when people say "don't ruminate" what they mean is don't feed the storytelling part

you tend to the emotion ("I'm feeling x. why am I feeling that? how do I move forward given that information? what's something nice I can do for myself right now to cope with this?") but you treat the storytelling part like a little goblin that's trying to be as unhelpful to this whole process as possible. this doesn't shut the storytelling goblin up completely, but it keeps it from causing so much chaos and over time it stops talking so damn much

it's basically like if you were trying to comfort a friend. you'd validate their emotions, but you wouldn't sit there and let them call themself a piece of shit. do that for yourself

sharing this in case someone else is also like Why Didn't Someone Just Say That

Some fun out of context things from tonight's over an hour long game changer episode

cliterally

im really sorry to keep asking for more, but i can't keep going. i stopped taking my hrt a little over a month ago because i couldn't afford it, and i figured it was safer for me if my body stopped changing. but ever since, my mental health has been in severe decline, and im having a really hard time. i don't want to die, but my suicidal thoughts are back.

my body has been wracked with pain for over a year and a half, but i haven't gotten to the point where i can apply for disability just yet. i hate having to ask, but i need about $150 for my usual diy order. anything you can give helps. if you reblog, please don't tag this post

i had to spend some of the money on groceries, and i need to buy pain meds soon too. After what i spent, I'm at $77 out of the now $200 needed

I'm now at $160 out of $200. thank you so much, everyone!! im so close to my goal

boy toys 🎾

gambling with angels is easy. they can't lie but they have addictive personalities; it's easy to clean them out then make them divulge secrets about the business of heaven to call your bets. my dad used to say "hey, watch this" and summon angels to play poker with him with a sort of bone flute he inherited from his grandpa, and they'd be holding horseshit and still want to call him. i'm talking "raise on a two pair" level bad at it, but they couldn't stop trying to win. my dad taught me all the secret names of God before i was out of grade school and i would use them to curse my enemies so they came down with leprosy. you can cure leprosy these days but it still sucks, especially for a child. but they had it coming for pissing me off

Guys, let's make a sandwich. I'll start:

Bread

the souls of the innocent

The sins of the guilty

time loop

Guys, let's make a sandwich. I'll start:

Bread

the souls of the innocent

The sins of the guilty

time loop

Guys, let's make a sandwich. I'll start:

Bread

the souls of the innocent

The sins of the guilty

time loop

Guys, let’s make a sandwich. I’ll start:

Bread

the souls of the innocent

the sins of the guilty

time loop

Guys, let’s make a sandwich. I’ll start:

Bread

the souls of the innocent

the sins of the guilty

time loop

Guys, let’s make a sandwich. I’ll start:

Bread

the souls of the innocent

the sins of the guilty

hi im emily whats going on in here

Sandwich 👍

THE TIMELOOP HAS BEEN BROKEN EVERYBODY SAY THANK YOU EMILY

Mustard

Bread

thank you emily good job everyone

you can tell a lot about a guy by the stuff you make up in your head about him

this is the official position of the supreme court of the united kingdom

Hey I have an appointment at 9 I can't get to... does anyone feel kind enough to help me? 25 could get me there and back. It's out of town :(

Cash and pay are both agenderdread. Dm for z_lle or v_nmo

In Weimar Germany, in 1930, before Hitler, you could get gender treatment as a trans woman. The laws against homosexuality were largely unenforced, and the earliest gender-affirming surgeries were being developed.

A few years later, those same people were all living inside Hitler's Germany. It was all gone.

In the US in 2024 you could get an M, F, or X gender marker on your passport. No questions asked, just circle the box you want.

It's gone now.

Each verse of history has the same refrain. Kill your generation's fascists and rebuild.

YOU hate JK Rowling!

I'm so tired

This is how it feels going to and from work in 2025

the day i finally release my inhibitions and feel the rain on my skin it’s over for you bitches

Something you gotta understand about me is that I am utterly reliant on my Beverages

being a symbolism enjoyer should humble you because at the end of the day no matter how eloquently you articulate it youre essentially saying "i love it when things have meaning"

my hobbies are Colours and Shapes but, like, in a mature, sophisticated adult way

white t girl i love you. and also do not forget that you are not the modern martyr for the oppressed voice. that's still black girls. it's always been black girls. stories of black martyrdom simply don't make it into the news cycle until the unrest caused by its reporting can be packaged as a "riot" segment between traffic reports. i know you suffer, but whatever you're experiencing, i beg you, when interacting with your community and building nuanced understandings of each other and the system which binds us, to not forget that a black tgirl has felt it 100 times worse before positioning yourself as an authority on all systems of oppression for having suffered unjustly at all. because you have suffered unjustly, but suffering unjustly as a white person means something so much different.

serenely reblogging this once more after deleting responses from white people saying "talking about this is actually unhelpful because im oppressed too" yeah i know. i wrote that down in the post i made, and i also wrote down why remembering the difference is important. did you read it?

there is no malice in my reminder. no "you need to do better", just a reminder. do not read it as such. i didn't write it as such.

again. i did not say you were not oppressed. this post is literally about how you are oppressed. it is a reminder that you are not the most oppressed person in the world, a way i've seen a lot of white transfems acting lately. maybe not even necessarily in a detrimental way, but in a way that definitely leans towards the "white is default" lane of thinking, which erases black suffering, which erases progress towards black safety. this, to me, is troubling, which is why i made this post. it's important when building solidarity within our community to understand who the most vulnerable of us are, because the safety of the most vulnerable of us will ultimately be the safety of all of us.

please do not be offended when you are reminded that your skin is white. im not calling you evil. im asking you to remain aware of yourself.

Oh hey I wrote a small essay on exactly this back when I was still being kind and calmly explaining things to yakubian devils

wow, look at that, a black trans woman saying the exact thing i said, except she said it a year ago and it didnt get as much traction.

"weird! i wonder why!" she exclaimed, whitely.

please read it. it's not long.

Thing is that I’m not the only Black trans woman writing theory on transfeminism, Black transfeminism, or trans intersectionality - I’m just lightskinned and won’t shut up so I’m one of the most visible ones, and crackers STILL get mad at me for saying the most basic-ass concepts like “white people are still white even if they’re otherwise marginalized”

In many cases, intracommunity racial intersectionality fails because given the choice between solidarity with nonwhite trans people and white people (trans or cis), white trans people will almost always side with other whites in the hopes of preserving a degraded position within white supremacy, because they internally see being “lesser” within whites supremacy but still above nonwhites as preferable to solidarity with nonwhites that loses them that positionality.

I wanna toss this link on here because it’s directly related to the whole “lack of intracommunity solidarity when race is involved” thing and has a specific example from my local community.