tfw im sad and anna @casgliadkingdcm logs in just to give me cute memes. best friend goals tbh.

* VIOLENT ACTION STARTERS Send me a NUMBER for your muse to : 

001. — Backhand my muse. 002. — Stab my muse.  003. — Put out a cigarette on my muse’s skin. 004. — Hit my muse with a blunt object.  005. — Throw something large at my muse.  006. — Kick my muse. 007. — Punch my muse. 008. — Break one of my muse’s bones. 009. — Scratch my muse. 010. — Headbutt my muse. 011. — Shoot my muse. 012. — Knock my muse out. 013. — Strangle my muse. 014. — Push my muse roughly. 015. — Grab my muse by the hair. 016. — Bruise my muse. 017. — Threathen my muse with an object of harm.  018. — Go to harm my muse’s eyes. 019. — Bite my muse. 020. — Tear away parts of my muse’s skin. 021. — Force my muse’s head under water. 022. — Throw something scalding at my muse. 023. — Burn my muse. 024. — Step on my muse’s fingers. 025. — Rip one of my muse’s teeth out. 026. — Slash my muse’s achilles tendon ( s ). 027. — Clothesline my muse. 028. — Harm my muse enough for them to cough up blood.  029. — Drive into my muse with a vehicle. 030. — Electrocute my muse. 031. — Slam my muse against a wall. 032. — Force my muse’s arm behind their back. 033. — Kick my muse’s crotch. 034. — Trip my muse. 035. — Put my muse in a headlock. 036. — Break my muse’s nose. 037. — Force their fingers down my muse’s throat. 038. — Crack my muse’s head against a wall. 039. — Attempt to kill my muse. 040. — Attempt to kill my muse creatively.

• “You’re hair is really soft after you wash it.”
• “Ssh. Stop fussing. I’m just braiding your hair.”
• “You smell really nice.”
• “Would it be all right if I borrowed your sweater? It smells like you.”
• “I might have slept with your robe when you were gone.”
• “If you steal the blankets, I am going to put my cold feet on you.”
• “Here, let’s share the blanket.”
• “You’re comfy.”
• “You are my new pillow.”
• “You are very endearing when you are half-asleep.”
• “But I want to hear you sing.”
• “We can talk over dinner.”
• “Don’t be stubborn. Try it!”
• “Don’t get up - I’ll do it.”
• “Will you let me rub your back?”
• “Care to give me a back scratch?”
• “Star-gazing was a good idea.”
• “You look beautiful/handsome in the moonlight.”
• “I’ll always be here for you.”
• “I’ll be here to protect you.”
• “I think I love you.”
• “You are my love.”
• “How about something warm? It will will help you sleep.”
• “It’s okay. I couldn’t sleep anyway.”
• “Don’t be silly. I want to stay up with you.”
• “It is not morning yet.”
• “Shush and go back to bed.”
• “I heard you talking in your sleep.”
• “Your bed head is really cute.”
• “We’ll do dishes together.”
• “How about a kiss?”
• “I love your hugs.”

Yo can y’all give ya girl a bit of a promo? This is a MUTLIMUSE TEAM of 4 people with super powers. This follows no canon of any piece of s.uperhero media besides my own story I’m working on. So if you like just simple average joes with superpowers in a world where almost everything is abnormal click that reblog button my dude! This is written by Skeley.

• “Betrayed by my own butt yet again.”
• “Can you explain memes to me?”
• “Contrary to popular belief, penguins are… birds.”
• “Did you think I was gonna stab you just now?”
• “Don’t cry. Don’t cry. I swear to god if you cry again.”
• “Don’t write checks your dick can’t cash.”
• “Here’s to bad decisions and relaxed moral values.”
• “How’s the…… jeeeeeeeeeesus?”
• “I am a happy little cheese monster.”
• “I am spinning a web of lies that I fear will one day consume me.”
• “I don’t want your stupid fruit leather.”
• “I have to get a solid two to three hours of brooding in per day. Filling quotas.”
• “It’s called ‘string cheese’ and not ‘chompy cheese’ for a reason.”
• “I’ll probably end up standing uncomfortably in the corner with a plate of food and hope that nobody talks to me.”
• “I’m so many levels of irony deep I’ve forgotten what humour is.”
• “I’m suddenly struck with the overwhelming need to crawl back into bed.”
• “Mothman is bullshit.”
• “My ultimate sexual fantasy is sleeping in on a Saturday.”
• “OH SHIT THAT’S A KNIFE.”
• “See you in class… bitch.”
• “Sharks are tight.”
• “So, you ever kill a man?”
• “Stop being so desperate to please your hot friend.”
• “That… that is a good butt.”
• “The key to being cool is acting like you don’t care about anything but actually care very deeply about everything to the point where it’s debilitating.”
• “This ice cream cake is my new boyfriend.”
• “This is where I come to masturbate.”
• “Wait, I’m a wreck.”
• “WHAT HAVE YOU DONE.”
• “You can never be too careful. See that baby in that stroller over there? Government operative.”
• “Your face… is… good.”
• “Your unending thirst will be your ultimate downfall.”

• “Want to take a walk with me?” 
• “Do you need a hug?” 
• “Dude, I’m taking you out shopping. No buts.” 
• “This couch is big enough for the both of us.” 
• “I stole your __ I hope you don’t mind.” 
• “Can I hold your hand?” 
• “There’s nothing wrong with friends holding hands!” 
• “You look like you could use a hug.” 
• “My socks look good on you. I wondered where they went.” 
• “Come here! Cuddle session!” 
• “Think I can squeeze in there with you?” 
• “Why did you put that all the way up there?” 
• “Can you open this for me?” 
• “Do you need help opening that?” 
• “Not gonna lie, your clothes look good on me.” 
• “You look comfy.”
• “You look good today!” 
• “Can I brush your hair?” 
• “Can you brush my hair?” 
• “Can you get that for me?” 
• “I’m wearing your name tag obviously I’m you.” 
• “This couch is all mine I will push you off if you try sitting on it.” 
• “Budge up you’re hogging all the room.” 
• “I know that look- you’re up to no good.” 
• “Do you know where __ went?” 
• “I will roll you up in a blanket if you refuse to go to bed.”