海辺

When you see your pet and start petting their head and it’s randomly wet and you ask them “what happened why are you wet!!!!!!” And the pet doesn’t answer

OK the only people I have known who have a garage fridge are Korean and use it for kimchi because they make enough of it they need a Designated Kimchi Fridge, so I get that.

But can my fellow white Americans please explain what you put in the second fridge?

Do we have a franz kafka diary entry for july 1st, i want to know what he thinks!!!

happy too tired July everyone

[image text: "July 1. Too tired." end text]

bong_a_gan

AITA for killing my boyfriend?

I (18M, completely straight) am a honors student at a prestigious university, a consultant for the greatest detective in the world, and a mass murderer. Said detective (?M, probably in his 20s idk) is investigating the case of my murders (🙈) and suspects me. Because of that, I have decided to join the investigation myself in order to kill him before he gets me. I'm very smart, you see

Things went a little off the rails though. I had to give myself amnesia while I got someone else to commit crimes for me in order to throw them off, and ended up joining the investigation for real. And memoryless me fell in love with the detective (let's call him El). I didn't expect this to happen (even though I am very smart) because I'm straight and he's ugly and I don't even like the way that he's a genius and knows me inside and out and can complete my every sentence like we're in our own world, away from everyone else, with a connection deeper than anything I've ever experienced

Anyway. Our relationship grew from there (I moved in and we handcuffed ourselves so we could be together always) and I can honestly say that those were the best moments of my life. I never felt like I had this much purpose, like things clicked so well, before. I was determined to keep this happiness, whatever happened

And then we caught my stand-in and I regained my memories

The thing is, I couldn't just let that go! People were counting me to commit these murders (I am basically a god) and also I love killing people. In fact, one of the things that brought El and I together was the fact that we both hate human rights and women. The way he tortures young women captivated me

So I went ahead and killed him a few days later. That very same day, we had a very emotional moment out in the rain and then he used a towel to wipe my feet. I felt like it was a fitting goodbye

After that I took his identity and became the leader of the investigation, but now the taskforce is blowing up my phone saying that "Kira is so evil" and "it's a shame that El died" and "murder is bad" and stuff like that. Most importantly, though, I'm bored without El here, and I am beginning to suspect that this might be my own fault for killing him

So... AITA?

Why does water take so long to boil I hate it here

Huh i wonder if theres a helpful lil fella in the notes to tell you why

“Hello and welcome to my Tumblr. Here you probably won’t find any basic info about me like my name or what I usually like to do, but you absolutely will find all my deepest darkest secrets and emotions along with my body measurements”

the wise man at the nudist beach, when discovered by an acquaintance, covers not his dick but his face

i feel like diogenes fucking ghostwrote that last bit

pandora’s box but it’s a gamecube

girl no

She opens up the disc drive and all the horrors of the world are released but there is also a copy of Sonic Adventure 2 Battle

Best day ever.

hey everyone its april fools. but dont worry i dont have anything planned. just going to sit here and...

I LIED !!!! GET PRANKED

POST BELOW ME GET FUCKING WET

Hi guys i'm so glad no one's doing april fAAAAAAAHHH AHHHHHH AAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! WHO DID THSI

angy

Saturation

the miraluci agenda