let's all think about the gq jenson button photoshoot together!

let's all short circuit together! via

McLaren Honda you'll always have a special place in my heart

Schumacher (2021)

(German Interview)

Part 2 FIONA: Why are only boys driving in Formula 1?

VETTEL: Well, that is a good question. The problem is, that too few girls want to drive races, when they are very young. You start in a small car, a kart. And even back in my time, there already weren’t many girls there. FIONA: Which job would you would you like to do? VETTEL: I had many career aspirations in the past: football-player, fire-fighter. Then I quickly came to racing driver and thanks god it worked out then. I still went to school, made my Abitur and looked what I could study. FIONA: Why are you always doing the Vettelfinger, when you are happy? VETTEL: That was a coincidence. Five years ago I was so happy at my first victory, about being first at the top of the result list. Then I started to show one finger. So to say as a sign for the number one. Since then it showed to be a good ritual. TIM: How fast do you drive on the autobahn? VETTEL: That depends on how fast you are allowed to. In german you are allowed to open the throttle if the autobahn is free. But mostly there are too many other cars, that is dangerous. That’s why I drive Formula 1, there I can always drive fast! LOUIS: How old have you been, when you starting karting? VETTEL: I was three or four years old. We had a little yard at home, there I always rushed around. That was a very small kart, not too fast. My father always ran beside me. My first race I drove, when I was your age. I always drove on the go-kart track of Michael Schumacher, with many, many other kids. There I learned with five years things, which I still need today. TIM: Where are you putting all the trophies? They are so big… VETTEL: Good Question! At the moment I really am lacking a little space. But that is a nice problem, if you have more trophies than room. Much room and no trophies, would be stupid, too. LOUIS: What is your favorite track? VETTEL: I don’t have just one. But if I had to pick one, then I would pick Japan. There they have many, many quick corners, where you can drive through in fifth gear with 200km/h. From left to right, you are always shaken from one side to the other, but that is fun. FIONA: Do you have friends from the racing drivers? VETTEL: I still know many drivers from my karting times. There you of course made friendships, but none of them is driving Formula 1 today. They take part in touring car competitons, so normal cars.

FIONA: And in Formula 1? VETTEL: There are always drivers, with that you get along better. It’s probably a little bit like in school. Some you like, some you dislike. Nico Hülkenberg is a great guy and with Timo Glock I got along great as well, but he is not driving Formula 1 anymore. And I like Kimi Räikkönen, he is from finnland and speaks all funny. LOUIS: How expensive is a Formula 1 car? VETTEL: You can’t say that precisely, cause the car is made from sooo many parts, like a puzzle. But if you count it together, then it is very, very expensive. I would guess 2 million Euro, so as expensive as hundreds of your parents cars together. So it is better, if I don’t crash it in the race.

(German Interview)

I’ll translate this I hope you don’t mind!

First grade students Fiona, Louis and Tim interviewed Sebastian Vettel, they asked some really intresting questions, which we all would like to ask Seb…

Part 1

TIM: What are you doing, when there is no formula 1 race?

SEBASTIAN: Then for example I watch football and cheer for Eintracht Frankfurt. That was the first stadium, where I was with friends in the past. And you?

TIM (8): I am Schalke-fan!

FIONA (8): Dortmund!

LOUIS (7): I’m for Bayern!

SEBASTIAN: They won alot last year, right? And Dortmund sadly lost in the final. Let’s see what happens this year!

TIM: Do you also play Video Games, like Super Mario Kart?

SEBASTIAN: Yes, sometimes. I always pick Yoshi as a driver. And you? TIM: Super Mario!

LOUIS: Are you a good co-driver or are you nagging all the time? SEBASTIAN: Actually I’m a good co-driver, as long as I have the feeling, that I’m in good hands. But I also did sometimes make up excuses, to get out (of the car), then I said, that I’m sick. (laughs) LOUIS: Have you ever been stopped by the police? SEBASTIAN: Sadly already a few times. I already needed to blow (the alcoholimeter) once, cause the police wanted to know, if I had drunk too much. I never have been too fast, so far. It would be kinda stupid, without driving license as well. TIM: What do you do, when you need to pee in the car?

SEBASTIAN: Stopping doesn’t work so well, then I would always be last. There are drivers that just pee into their pants. ALL THREE: Ihhhhh!!! How disgusting! SEBASTIAN: Not me! I so far always managed to stay dry! The trick is to go to the toilet in the garage, shortly before (the race). TIM: Why are you not wearing diapers? SEBASTIAN: Because I would probably not fit into my seat anymore, it is so narrow.

FIONA: What other sports are you doing? SEBASTIAN: I enjoy playing tennis, football, I go running and ride the bike. Sometimes I also go swimming, but that is not as much fun, cause it is a little boring, there I can listen to music. And what sports do you do? You playing football? TIM: Yes, I am! FIONA: I do ballet and gymnastics! ! SEBASTIAN: Wow! Not bad! FIONA: Do you have a girlfriend? SEBASTIAN: Yes, I do and that even quite long already. Do you have a boyfriend? FIONA: Yes, at home. But not really. SEBASTIAN: Ach, you still have some time!

I’m so pissed that Jesse Spencer us transphobic like bro whyyy

every house md episode part 2

random girl: hey gramps! let’s go for a run! get them juices flowing!

gramps: i’m a bit old, katy, so we’ll have to go slow

*they go running*

gramps: hhhh. hHhHhH

katy: you ok gramps? you need your inhaler?

gramps: o mi god katy your eyes are bleeding..

katy: *faints*

*INTRO MUSIC*

house: *bouncing ball around in his office, daydreaming about wilson*

cuddy: HOUSE the clinic is BACKED UP get in there NOW

house: no but i’ve got a case *lying*

cuddy: sure you do… get down there now

at the clinic

house: *sighs and picks up a file*

cameron: *runs up to house* i have a case!

house: i’ll take it! CUDDYYYY I HAVE A CASE FOR REALS NOW

cuddy: *is in distress*

house: *scurries away*

*** house: what’s the case

cameron: a girl fainted while running—

house: how unusual

cameron: running with her grandfather. and her eyes started bleeding

house: *snoring sounds*

cameron: … and uh she has low potassium—

house: she ugly?

cameron: what? no

house: you always pick the ugly ones

cameron: no i don’t

house: so why’d you pick her? why do you feel bad for her?

cameron: i don’t i just thought her case was interesting.

house: a girl who doesn’t enough bananas is interesting?

cameron: her eyes started bleeding!

house: is she a widow?

cameron: she’s 17!

house: so?

they walk into the office

chase: wow… she lost both her parents and lives with her grandfather…

house: bingo!

***

the office is silent as the ducklings read katy’s file

house: please, not everybody all at once..

foreman: it’s a brain clot. got activated when she went running.

house: bad. next

chase: it’s lady gaga virus! that’s why it came on suddenly

house: check for a brain clot

foreman: *evil smirk*

*** cameron is in the patient’s room getting blood

cameron: it must be hard… both parents dead. living with your grandfather

katy: i don’t need your pity

*** chase: *walking into the office with the other minions behind him* it’s not a brain clot

house: hmmmm…

chase: back to lady gaga virus—

house: it is NOT lady gaga virus you idiot

cameron: maybe an eyeball embolism caused by a seizure?

house: and why would she have had a seizure?

cameron: low potassium causes invisible seizure syndrome. she wouldn’t have noticed it.

house: that’s 1 in a million rare… i like it. do five blood cultures

the minions obey

***

cameron: it’s not eyeball embolism!!

chase: LADY GAGA VIRUS

house: FOR THE LAST TIME, IT IS NOT— *epiphany* omygod it’s lady gaga virus…

chase: *evil smirk*

*** the patient has recovered.

wilson: it is now time for my 5 minutes of screen time

House md is insane so here’s some things that happen in the show (in no particular order)

ANOTHER scene im obsessed w btw. specifically bc you can see jennifer morrison genuinely cracking up in the wide shot and i think its adorable

He lost a bet:3

they're officially my favourite duo of the show after hilson

ok, there's a famous meme in brazil about house md and i don't know if there is an english version for this meme, so i'll try to translate as best i can:

every episode of house md is like

> the patient arrives the hospital.

> the patient is a prostitute or a religious fanatic.

> dr. house attends the patient. she's very sick.

“dr. house, we don't know what to do!! she's bleeding from her eyes!!”

“do the exams, you idiot”

> dr. house will talk with the patient.

“you're stupid. fuck you.”

“dr. house, i hate youuu!! please heal meeee!!”

> cameron, chase and foreman come back to the room.

“dr. house, all the exams were negative. she's gonna die in 2 hours if we do nothing!! will be game over for her.”

“hmmm... game over... oh, there's a gameboy in her ass, that's the problem!”

“dr. house, you're an idiot, but we will check if there really is a gameboy in her ass.”

> they found the gameboy in her ass.

“oh my god, dr. house!! you were right. how did you know that?”

“the gameboys pikachu edition released in 1997 had an iodine-based battery, which if inserted in the butt makes your eyes bleed”

> the patient, cured, enters in the room.

“i was wrong about you, dr. house”

“fuck you, you're a whore! life is pain!!”

> dr. house go to lunch and flirt with dr. wilson <3

> the end.

It's all about specificity