Swamp Espresso

Being this ill sucks. Spending most days at home with a fever sucks. But finally we went out for an evening walk to air our heads. And the sunset was gorgeous, adorning my favourite colours. And he picked a handful of forget-me-nots for me. Moments like these heal something inside me, a little bit each time. Being sucked into the rushed routine and lifestyle likely drains the life of me; I see I’d rather live a soft slow life. ✨🌸🖤

My first covid case update.

I’ve dealt with fever, my body and skin doesn’t ache anymore. That sensation was so wild. But the cough is still pretty painful and I can’t get a clear cough either. So my sick leave got extended, since I have to speak at work a lot & I won’t be able to do when I cough like I’m about to throw up a lung. 🫁

The craziest thing is that taste and smell loss. Hva fæn?? I choose food now by texture I want to feel rather than taste (and nutrition of course). I ate such spicy stuff that usually would make my taste buds scream; now it just felt mildly spicy. 🌶️ I really hope it normalises soon. Because I read some people took a year 😭

I’m so heckin tired. I seem to struggle with finding my place. I continuously hop from job to job, never finding where I belong. Even this job I at first was happy with, I start to feel like I overshot this time. I have met my reality check of things that I’m not able to do (or more like things that brush me the wrong way and I wasn’t aware of it before). And it sucks. I feel so lost again, because I feel I already am disheartened to keep working there because of it. It’s still my trial period, I should definitely talk to my supervisor about my doubts. But thinking to the near future - I don’t really see myself there… Is there anything better being offered to me now? No. (: I’m really so exhausted I just want to feel as stable as possible.

Ohmyfuckinggods I have covid, for the first time. Not only do I have the shittiest cold symptoms but also my whole samn body hurts - I want to climb out of it. And the fever knocked me down for the whole day. I wasn’t even feeling hungry, strangely. It’s been so long that I felt this horrible omg