Sometimes the help you need isn’t the help you want. Call 1-800-273-8255 if you’re thinking of suicide.
This comic meant a whole lot to me. It was sincere in its depiction and treated the issue through the eyes of a grounded person. Not some godly hero saying everything is better than it seems, but a person trying his best before bringing her somewhere who can actually help.
Reblog every time
a weak and tortured bucky making sure steve gets to safety first
It’s because Bucky has a habit of letting Steve go first.
—–
1) Always let Steve go first up the stairs, so that you can keep an eye on him. It’s easier to count Steve’s breaths and notice when Steve’s heart does that thing that makes him stop and shake. Much easier to stop and pretend to tie your shoes while you wait, worried, than to realize 2 flights too late that Steve’s no longer with you.
Later: Your limbs are sore and numb from being strapped to a table for 2 days and you’re pretty sure you haven’t eaten and the entire base might be exploding, but when Steve says “let’s go up,” you tell him to go first.
——-
2) Steve’s walk was mostly normal, though he swung his hips in a certain way to compensate for his scoliosis, and that put a special cadence to his stride that you unconsciously match. Even without Steve around you would twist your hip back before swinging your leg forward. Twist, swing, twist, swing.
Later: Steve is leading the way through the forest, and you’re finally used to his height and broad shoulders and that dumb shield, but something still feels wrong. Somehow your pace doesn’t quite match, and you can’t figure out why.
——-
3) Colors don’t work the same with Steve, so always describe unfamiliar objects by their shape and relative location, like that square window past the third door on the left, or the man wearing that unseasonably long coat standing in the corner by the garbage can.
Later: The boys are singing in the other room and you’re at the bar with Steve, trying very hard to get drunk because of course you’ll follow Steve into whatever but that doesn’t mean you have to do it sober. “Steve,” you whisper, “Check out that lady by the door, next to that short thin guy who has his shirt open.“ Steve looks over. “The one in the red dress? That’s Miss Carter.“ You can’t decide what surprises you more – that Steve can see red now, or that he knows her name. So you decide you need another drink.
——-
4) When walking down a narrow dark alleyway always stay on the right, because Steve’s bad ear makes the right side feel blind to him (though damn if Steve’d ever admit that). On broad open streets, switch to Steve’s left side, so that Steve could hear you better through the noise.
Later: Dum-Dum gives you a weird look as you line up to charge into a Hydra base. “Why won’t you take the left flank for a change?“ You start explaining Steve’s bad ear before you remember that he’s not that Steve any more, and that Captain America doesn’t have a bad ear.
——-
5) Stuff in your left pockets are for Steve: the asthma cigarettes that Steve could never afford, a dime for that popcorn that Steve likes, tickets for whatever shindig you’re trying to drag Steve along to. Sometimes you put things there for Steve and totally forget about it, like extra paper and a spare pencil in case Steve wants to doodle. The left side always belongs to Steve.
Later: Steve is awfully quiet by the campfire. You sit down by his good ear and reach into your left pocket. “Hey,” you say, pulling out a news clipping about the war front that featured a lovely photo of Miss Carter. “You read this yet? They think Morita’s a Japanese defector, but the section on Dernier is priceless.”
—————
Still later:
Report on the Winter Soldier reset procedures
After the latest test run, only the following anomalies remain:
A) The asset tends to hug the right walls and not the left, and hesitates for 30 microseconds before climbing stairs. However, he does not hesitate when scaling walls or ladders.
B) When walking unopposed the asset has a characteristic and identifiable stride, which is dropped when he is making a covered approach.
C) The asset communicates via relative locations, often omitting crucial color information. However, he can be commanded to describe the colors of any object in impressive detail.
D) When dressing himself, the asset keeps his knives exclusively on his right side, and his left pockets are underutilized. This may be an effect of continued unfamiliarity with the new left arm.
After extensive field testing, we have determined that these anomalies do not impede the asset from completing his missions, and declare the reset process complete.
——————
(Some habits linger, even when the person is gone.)
[basically the textual partner to the colorblindness comic] [Steve-angst sequel here, happy resolution pseudo-sequel here]
[and now with colorblindness commentary]
Will always reblog this post.
OUCH
Oh I didn’t need to read this sadness this morning.
being a female means needing to see 10 different doctors to get a proper diagnosis because they always think you’re exaggerating and/or lying
define proper diagnosis. I mean, does that just mean the diagnosis you want?
no :) it means going to 10 different doctors who disbelieved your symptoms until the 11th found cysts on your ovaries :) which may mean infertility :) sit on a cactus :)
I call bullshit
Of course you do. Like the first 10 doctors. 😒
I call bullshit on the story. If you think you have an issue you should see a specialist not just your PCP.
Like the 4 “specialists” I saw for the crippling numbness in my face and legs I had for over a year while they told me it was “stress”? When it was finally found that I had scars on my brain and spine? Those “specialists” we’re male neurologist who wouldn’t give me an MRI because “women stress too much”. Go fuck yourself.
MY SPINE WAS BROKEN FOR 2 YEARS BECAUSE MY DOCTORS TOLD ME I JUST HAD BAD CRAMPS AND REFUSED TO TAKE XRAYS. FUCK YOU AND YOUR ENTIRE LIFE. WHEN WILL BOYS REALIZE THEIR EXPERIENCES ARENT STANDARD???? I ALSO LOVE THIS IDEA THAT YOU CAN JUST GO TO A SPECIALIST WHENEVER YOU WANT LOL IF OUR PCP DOESNT BELIEVE US WHEN WE TELL THEM OUR SYMPTOMS THEY ARENT GONNA REFER US TO A SPECIALIST YOU FUCKING MOLDY WALNUT
My parents began noticing something large in my throat, saw a specialist….Guess what? Told me to lose some weight..even though I wasn’t overweight. I would have my period for weeks at a time. Was told that it was teenage hormones and stress.
Two fucking years later I attempted suicide they ran a battery of tests as required and bam! They find out that I have untreated Hashimoto’s. The “thing” was a goiter. Possible symptoms of an untreated thyroid disease is the goiter, unexplained weight gain, and depression. All they had to do was test my blood, but they said young people don’t have thyroid problems. 😒
-Allie
Ten years ago, my mother—who is a pretty tough cookie—started feeling both ridiculously wired, anxious, and incredibly emotional. Every doctor she saw told her she was going through early menopause, even though she was still menstruating. Her health declined to point where she was barely sleeping, losing weight, and crying constantly, which was a huge red flag because my mother never cries. Finally, she went to see another doctor 2.5 hours away who referred her to an endocrinologist. And what did the endocrinologist say? He diagnosed her with one of the most advanced cases of Grave’s Disease he had even seen, and said if she had gone just a few more months without being treated, she could have FUCKING DIED.
Also, it turned out that her thyroid levels had been moving out of the normal range in a progressive pattern for years, but nobody bothered to look at her past test results until after the diagnosis. They would just do a test, see that it was “in the normal range” and leave it at that. She could have caught it before she even had symptoms, instead of basically being accused of having hysteria.
i had a brain aneurysm/hemorrhage ten years ago, doctors still tell me im faking my disability BECAUSE YOU CAN TOTALLY FAKE LIMITED MOVEMENT OF THE LEFT SIDE
My sister had intercranial hypertension which was causing headaches, dizzy spells and loss of vision, and you know what the hospital told her? She was being a hysterical girl and making it up. A few weeks later she spent roughly a month in hospital and had several lumbar punctures to relieve her RECORD HIGH spinal pressure that was causing so much strain on her brain and optic nerves she was being sent blind.
Everytime I see this post (and it’s been a good 5/6 times), it has different stories and experiences of women who have been horribly mistreated by doctors and it just blows my mind that this is so big. It’s absolutely disgusting how terribly women are treated in the medical world and something needs to be done about that.
I constantly had stomach pains at 22 but I also have had PCOS since I was 13. Every doctor I talked to dismissed it as my very harsh cramps with little to no further examination. One day I forced my parents to send me to the ER and was told my gallbladder was so large that the head of general surgery (of a NYC hospital) told me it was the largest he had ever seen in his life and he was furious with my doctors because they should have caught it over a year ago.
He also told me that I was about an hour from dying from the infection.
When I was 21, I started passing out multiple times a day for no obvious reason. The hospital did not one but two urine pregnancy tests, and when they came back negative they took blood for the pregnancy test.
They sent me to a cardiologist, who told me I was just fat.
I went to a neurologist, who told me I have severe narcolepsy.
Even my simplest problem was a fight with so called experts. For months I had hip and back pain. My doctor first told me it was because I was overweight, then changed his story and told me it was just a simple pocket a fluid. Finally a complelty separate doctor almost a year later did an xray. My right femur was longer than my left, and my spine was bent because of that. The doctor I saw before was a freaking leg length discrepancy EXPERT, and still didn’t want to listen because I was just a 19 year old girl. I’m not even going to get into the more complicated ones. That would take forever. Also it should be mentioned that most people, like we see up above. Think that all doctors are right all of the time. Even family members. So many times you hear from everyone around you “well the doctor said you’re fine, they know what they’re talking about. You didn’t go to medical school, they did” and so on. So just keep the faith in yourself so you can find out what’s wrong once and for all.
I had chest pains and dizziness for years that nobody could figure out and nobody really seemed to care to. I eventually went to the doctor for a sleep aid simply because I was exhausted from being kept up from severe chest pain. I told her I had pain that was affecting my ability to sleep and you know what she told me? “It sounds like you haven’t been getting enough rest. Try to lower your stress and get eight hours of sleep the pain will go away.” I mean, WHAT. I tell you I can’t get any sleep because I’m in too much pain and you tell me sleep is all I need to make the pain go away? But also you’re not going to do anything to help me get sleep? Wait, I’m sorry, they did prescribe meditation and mindfulness training. So helpful. Fast forward to me too weak to climb the stairs or do more than walk across the room and I go in to the ER to find out I have cardiomyopathy and am in heart failure. I could have died because no one thought to check if my chest pain was caused by a physical problem.
I had a neurologist DIAGNOSE ME WITH A HERNIA IN MY BRAIN and then tell me that “no, it doesn’t need surgery and it’s not responsible for this laundry list of symptoms you’re suffering that are textbook Chiari symptoms.” Thankfully I fought for a second opinion and the day I saw the head neurosurgeon at a neurologic hospital (btw neuro, cardiac, and vascular surgeons are often known to be egotistical assholes), he got DOWN ON HIS KNEES, HELD MY HANDS, APOLOGISED ON BEHALF OF HIS PROFESSION, AND PROMISED THEY’D GET ME FIXED. When the goddamn chief of neurosurgery at a neurological institute is literally kneeling in front of you and apologising for the act of a different doctor, you know that original doctor dun fucked up.
;; laughs in black with stage 4 endometriosis:: your own specialists will ignore your complaints. You pass out at work twice. You can barely stand during your period without feeling light head or completely overwhelmed with pain. It hurts to use the bathroom. 5 years ago you told your specialist your lower left abdomen hurts during your period. He says, “ it’s constipation”. And to come back if it gets worse. Your job goes bankrupt. You lose your insurance.
You see his partnera year later saying the same thing. She suggests you get an mri. You work at a temp agency, have insurance, but no paid days off.
A year later you’re on state insurance. Your symptoms are worse
You struggle to breathe going up stairs. Your abdomen burns. Your specialist tells you to find a pain specialist in your own time and suggests Orillisa or Lupron. Which, is historically terrible. He does not suggest surgery or discuss the MRI.
Devastated by him suggesting those meds you go to your pcp. The nurse practicioner explains the MRI findings. Endo is in your bowels and ovaries. Making life terrible.
You see your gynecologist six months later. They state the MRI your specialist’s partner told you to get has been revised. The endo has moved through your body like cancer.
Implants of your uterus lining are on your diaphragm, in your bowels, your bladder, your cervix, in and on your ovaries, and 6 centimeters of your lowet left abdomen tissue. You also probably have pcos. Your caee is so involved they draw a map so you can understand how serious your condition is.
This happened/is happening to me currently. If you live in Pittsburgh and have endometriosis stay away from Dr.Mansuria. He used to be a great Dr. Now he doesn’t gaf.
I SMASHED REBLOG SO HARD
THIS IS FUCKING AMAZING
Hello :) If you feel inspired, 36 With the Marauders would make my day :)
Hi! This didn’t end up being very fall–themed, but I couldn’t get the idea out of my head, so here it is! :)
“We’re here! And we have treats!” James didn’t wait for Remus’s answer before kicking the door open and marching in, a massive shopping bag clutched in each hand. Behind him were Sirius and Peter, who were carrying chocolate and a pile of fluffy blankets, respectively.
Remus’s eyes fluttered open, and he smiled gratefully. Even with the help of Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs, full moons were not pleasant, and the previous night had been especially hard. His entire body was sore, and he wanted nothing more than to sleep all day.
“Hey, Moony,” Sirius said softly. He sat on the edge of Remus’s bed and put his handful of chocolate bars on the pillow. Remus reached out and grabbed Sirius’s shirt, pulling him further onto the bed. As Sirius got closer, Remus wrapped his arms around his waist and when Sirius crawled under the blanket next to him, Remus stuck his face into his boyfriend’s neck.
“Hi, Pads,” he murmured. Sirius hugged him––not quite as tight as he usually did, but Remus was thankful for it this time––and kissed Remus’s curls.
The end of the bed sank down as James sat on it. “Want some snacks, Moony?” Remus shook his head and didn’t move from Sirius’s arms.
“He says no,” Sirius told James, and Remus heard the thud of James’s bags of food being put down on the floor. James threw himself on top of the blanket on Remus’s other side.
“Pete,” he said, “you know what to do.”
Peter dropped the blankets on the bed. “Which one do you want?” he asked. “There’s red, yellow, red and yellow––”
“All of them.” Remus’s words were muffled against Sirius’s shoulder, and Peter paused.
“All of them?”
“All of them.”
Peter unfolded the blankets, then squeezed onto the bed, putting himself directly in between James and Remus.
“There was so much space on my other side,” James complained.
“Yeah, that means you can move over.”
After a small tussle wherein James’s ego was damaged and not much else, the Marauders were settled into Remus’s bed, wrapped up in four blankets, with James somehow hugging all of them at once. Remus pulled the red and yellow blanket up to his nose. He closed his eyes and soon drifted off to sleep listening to the sounds of his friends’ quiet whispers.
The other three beds remained empty that night, and James only fell out of Remus’s bed once, so all four of them agreed that it had been a success.
This thread omg
Family doesn’t have to be blood related.
Sometimes family is a righteously angry little girl, her supportive brother, a random stranger with a thirst for chaos and justice, two foreign grandmas, and The Rest Of The Plane.
Defeating a Karen with song
Ruth Bader Ginsburg was born in Brooklyn in 1933. She meets Steve Rogers pre- or post-freezing.
OR BOTH!
1942:
It was nice to be back in New York, Steve thought, after touring the whole country with the Star Spangled Show. Even better, once the show was done here, they were going overseas – not into combat, but at least it was a start. It made him cheer up just to think about it, and he maybe threw a little extra flair into the show every night, took a little extra time at the stage door.
“What’s your name?” he asked, crouching to get on eye-level with the little girl who had been patiently waiting behind several taller, pushier people.
“Ruth,” she said shyly, offering him her autograph book.
“Lovely name,” he replied. “Did you like the show?”
She nodded. “I liked the dancing.”
“You gonna be a dancer when you grow up?”
“Nuh uh,” she said.
“What’re you gonna be?”
“A judge,” she said.
“Yeah? You gonna make sure justice is done?”
She nodded soberly.
“Well, Ruth, you gotta study hard, you know that, right?” he asked, as he signed her book. “I expect to see you on the bench someday.”
“Thank you,” she murmured, stepping back, and another handful of kids surged around her. Cute kid.
2012:
Steve had always liked Civics in school, but when you had to catch up on seventy years between your last history class and the present, it could get a little overwhelming. On the other hand, celebrity was good for something; when he’d been working on memorizing the names and major cases of the Supreme Court justices, Tony had said, “Well, do you want to meet them?”
A couple of long phone calls and a few weeks later, Steve passed through a LOT of security, down a hallway, and into a courtroom; it was early in the morning, ahead of the open public hours, and the room smelled like coffee. A tiny bird of a woman in a black gown was standing in front of the seating box.
“Captain,” she said, as he shook her hand.
“Justice Ginsburg, right?” he asked. “It’s an honor, ma’am.”
“I feel the same,” she said, and there was something very familiar about her smile. “I wanted to get here a little earlier than everyone else, to speak to you in private.”
He was opening his mouth, about to ask why, when she reached into a pocket of the robe and took out a battered leather book, the kind kids used to collect autographs in.
“I don’t suppose you remember, you must have signed a lot of autographs,” she said. “But back in the war, just before you left for overseas, I went to see your bond show.”
Steve looked down. Scrawled on the page was his clumsy signature and, in slightly better lettering, To Judge Ruth. Study Hard!
He looked up at her, eyes wide. “No, I remember – I asked if you wanted to be a dancer and you said no, you were going to be a judge.”
“You were the first adult outside of my family who didn’t sneer at a girl wanting to be a judge,” she said.
“Well,” Steve said faintly. “Guess you must have studied.”
“Captain America said he wanted to see me on the bench. Couldn’t very well let him down,” she replied, and Steve laughed.
May your memory be a blessing, Your Honor.
This is so wonderful 😩
this was cute until i realized the fish is probably trying to not get eaten
A fish trying not to get eaten wouldn’t slow down when the “predator” slows down. It also wouldn’t constantly swim in a circle near the edge of the tank; It’d try hiding. Also a fish in a tank in a a public place that is constantly filled with people is not likely to see people as predators.
Animals, I think people tend to forget, also enjoy playing.
yeah that fish is absolutely playing with that kid, if it really wanted to escape it would just dive into the reef in the center of the tank!
(Moorish Idols are reef fish and naturally will seek shelter in the nearest nook or cranny if they get scared.)
many people don’t realize this, but fish aren’t stupid animals! most of them are on par with mammals like mice and squirrels in terms of intelligence, and they absolutely do play.
I was at an aquarium a few years ago and decided to sketch a fish. It came up to me.
I decided to flip the book around and pressed it against the glass. Fish lost it
Swam away then came back with MORE FISH
to this day I love those little sketches and I really love how I got the fish to bring me it’s friends
Summary: The sea had been Bucky’s and Steve’s life, both content to swim from ocean to ocean, side by side. A part of them always felt as if they were missing something, but neither could tell what. One night they come across a woman, and it’s as if their pieces fell into place. Only she comes with her own baggage and past horrors. Neither Bucky or Steve are willing to live their life without her, but first, they have to figure out how to help her with her own.
Tag list for this are closed.
Fanart:
Moodboard by @myjoonifiedheart (Whom I can’t tag)
This is about my 20th time reading the series!!!! I kept up with it since part 9!!!!! It honesty one of the best stories I have ever read in my life!!!
Thank youuu 💖💖💖
Ditto! I re-read this story so damn much!!!! 😩🤧 it’s exceptional!!! Magnificent!!!
💕💞💗💖💙💜🤍💚🖤💛🤎💚💓💗💞💝
WAS ANYONE GONNA TELL ME TJERES A SPECIES OF TINY MICE THAT SLEEP INSIDE OF TULIPS OR WAS I SUPPOSED TO FIND THAT OUT FOR MYSELF
OHHH MY GOD??????????? ??/)ghhhe?.!)bc???
I believe this is an example of Sichuan musical theater, which is known for it’s skillful costume changes. It’s said that actors can change into completely different costumes on stage without the audience ever noticing. The technique is classified as a Chinese state secret.
This has me in real tears like … he deserves it
Last year, I bought a book of writing prompts, dog-eared pages that looked interesting, then never gave the book another glance. Recently while cleaning my book shelf, I read through it again, and wrote down the prompts that I thought I would like to write for. I thought it’d be fun to make a list, write stories based on these prompts, and post them here as I go.
I got these prompts from a book, published by Piccadilly (USA) Inc., called Write the Story. They are not of my own creation. Use a prompt if you want! Feel free to tag me because I’d love to read it Words to use included under the prompts I’ll write drabbles or one-shots, but if I like a prompt it may turn full length I’ll most likely be posting out of order
current count: 1/41
Prompts below the cut!
Summary: Your apartment happens to be right next to Bucky’s, heads only separated by a paper-thin wall, leading to you witnessing every second of his nightmares. Although, bonding over your late night conversations, you seem to forget that you never even saw him before.
A/N: I already wrote a different fic on Bucky’s nightmares (which you can find here) but I really like writing that kind of stuff so … yeah, here you go.
Warnings: some angst, some violence, mostly fluff, language, eventual smut
***
completed: June 10th
