I'm sorry that I did this

The blood is on my hands

I stare at my reflection

I don't know who I am

Practice my confession

In case I take the stand

I'll say I learned my lesson

I'll be a better man

"You KILLED him, Sebastian! You used an UNFORGIVABLE CURSE! I cannot look past this, if I turn a blind eye I am just as guilty!" Ominis was yelling at Sebastian in the Undercroft, completely ignoring Sebastian's attempts to explain himself and convince Ominis to not turn him in.

"I KNOW OMINIS! I'M SORRY, ITS MY FAULT! You don't think I know that. The nightmares of being covered in blood are reminder enough. Just let me explain myself. I will be better, I swear to you!" Sebastian shot back when he swore he would be better, his eyes moved to lock with mine, across the dimly lit Undercroft. Their secret place that holds so many positive memories now is the backdrop for this fight, it's almost poetic.

You're conflicted about whether to turn him in or protect him. Anne has made her choice and abandoned the house in Feldcroft with only a note left behind. She told people that Solomon had died in his sleep, which was convincing enough.

I'm packing up my things

And I'm wiping down the walls

I'm rinsing off my clothes

And I'm walking through the halls

I did it all for her

So I felt nothing at all

I don't know what she'll say

So I'll ask her when she calls

After we returned from the catacombs, Sebastian pushed everyone away. The most I heard of him was Ominis telling me how Sebastian would be screaming in his sleep, always the same things; "I won't let her suffer!", "ANNE!" and "Nooo!"

I didn't know what to do, I was in love with Sebastian. Never acted upon the feelings but I loved him regardless. I always helped him but tried to keep him away from the dark arts; he wound up heavily into the dark arts anyway. Sebastian Sallow was determined to a fault and sometimes crossed the line from determination to stubbornness. Unfortunately, he still learned the Unforgivable Curses despite Ominis attempting to stop him.

After Ominis and Sebastian's argument, I found Sebastian in the boy's dorm in the Slytherin common room. He was packing up his things, obviously he was preparing for the worst. I looked at him sadly, it was like the bright personality he had when I first met him was now dulled. Sebastian's shoulders were now slumped and his confident posture was now seemingly weighed down. "Bastian?" I said quietly as I reached to place my hand on his arm, at my touch he spun around to look at me with his face stained with tears.

Would you love me more

(Would you love me more)

If I killed someone for you?

Would you hold my hand?

(Would you hold my hand?)

They're the same ones that I used

When I killed someone for you

Sebastian looked at me with so much pain and hurt in his eyes. "Would you love me?" He asked, keeping his watery hazel eyes locked on mine. "What?" I asked, shock filling my voice. Did he know? How did he know how I felt about him?

We stayed that way for what could have been minutes, hours, or even days. Time seemed to stop as we stared at each other, the air becoming thick with the tension between us. "Would you love me, if I killed someone for you, MC?" Sebastian said this as he began to walk towards me and took both of my hands in his. His hands were larger than mine. They were warm, inviting, even comforting. "Would you hold my hand, if they're the same ones that killed someone?" He says quietly. I know what he is doing, he is trying to figure out who is on his side, who he can find comfort in and open up to. "Bash" I sighed "I care about you. But you know what you did was wrong. Killing Solomon was wrong, no matter if he was attacking us or not." I hugged him. This man may be a murderer to everyone else but he is still my best friend, he is still the man I love; he is just misguided right now.

Would you turn me in

(Would you turn me in)

When they say I'm on the loose?

Would you hide me when

(Would you hide me when)

My face is on the news?

'Cause I killed someone for you

"Are you going to turn me into Black, to the Ministry?" Sebastian asked holding me close enough that I could feel his heart racing in his chest. "No. I won't. But I don't condone what you've done and it will take time to fully forgive you." I stepped back from him looking him in the eyes as I continued to say "I killed for you too Sebastian...

You have to understand that

The one I killed was me

Changing what I was

For what you wanted me to be

I followed your direction

Did everything you asked

I hope that makes you happy

'Cause there's just no turning back

"MC. I'm sorry. You never needed to change for me. You had my attention from the moment I saw you enter the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom on your first day and I knew I loved you the moment you beat me in that duel. I know you probably don't feel the same but I had to tell you, in case I never get a chance again. I don't know what Ominis will do" Sebastian reaches out to cup my face in his hands, cradling it like I am made of glass and will shatter if he isn't careful enough. "Sebastian," I sighed turning into one of his hands and reaching out with my own to grab a hold of the front of his robes "I love you too." The next thing I felt was Sebastian's lips on mine. He was clutching me tightly against him. Our lips moved together in sync as if this was meant to be. It felt right to be in his arms.

Hmm?

:):):)

Does anyone else feel lonesome?

Not lonely. Not alone. Just... lonesome. Like you don't feel connected to anyone. Like you never feel that you will find anyone that understands you, that will see you truly, let alone someone who will even like you. You see friends everywhere, but you don't see yourself in their place, like that is not for you, like you're not made for that and that's not made for you. You see people having fun and laughing and dancing and getting drunk and falling in love and you just... don't feel that for yourself. Like you're not supposed to have that, like you can't because it's not for you and you're not for it.

Like you're supposed to be seeing all these beautiful things in the world but not experience them yourself. Like you want to experience so much, experience everything, but be overwhelmed by it so you don't do any of it.

Like you want to be everywhere and do everything, but you don't belong anywhere and can't do anything. Like you're not supposed to be here. Not in a self-deprecating way but in an incongruous way. You want to live you want to be alive, but you feel you're not supposed to be. Not here at least, not like this. Just a presence in the world, not an active member of it. Even your body doesn't feel like home, your face isn't a face you recognise, like you're not supposed to have either. Like you're just supposed to be.

Like you're supposed to observe, but not experience.

Sebastian Sallow when we use crucio on him in the Scriptorium

Just a few pics of bae hurting us intentionally in the Scriptorium quest 👀🥲 Particularly enjoy the look on his face when he's looking down on us writhing in agony. 🥵🥵🥵

“Drake. Why does the door say crucio?”

I don't know, Kermit, maybe they fucking locked it

Loki season 2 Spoilers & rant incoming:

I have never, EVER, bawled so hard in my life after a season finale. On the one hand I feel like this is the first time in a long ass time this phase where Disney has actually worked hard to give the fans something special. That being said I also feel DEPRESSED AS HELL.

I was doing some digging a few days back and I discovered I got into the Marvel/Loki fandom around the time of Thor: The Dark World. I was 11, and now I’m 21…

It just feels so overwhelming to see my favourite character grow and change so much over the years, just as much as I myself have grown and changed. It’s almost been like having a companion, and I’m sure many fans feel the same.

Also CAN WE GET TOM HIDDLESTON AN EMMY FOR CRYING OUT LOUD?!? Man has given his heart and soul into this character for so long and deserves some recognition. I know Tom will never see this post but, my goodness sir, thank you for all you have done for us in bringing this character to life for us fans

Now excuse me while I go cry about this for the next few days

He became the hero that we all knew he could be! Went from selfish to completely selfless.

Ironically he got the throne and power he carved but in a completely different way than he thought in the beginning. I smiled, I cheered, I cried. This was brilliant. I just know Frigga is so immensely proud of her son.

Tom's acting was phenomenal. He showed moments that were funny, emotional and dark all throughout this season. He definitely deserves an Emmy for this level of portraying emotions and multiple facets. Thank you Tom Hiddleston for bringing Loki to life in the MCU for all these years!

For All Time. Always.

As for the future I hope they play off of Loki telling Thor that the sun will shine on them again. Maybe Loki can project himself into the timelines to still play a role that way or maybe having Sylvie find either the Thor we know or THE THOR FROM HER TIMELINE. It would be awesome to see more of Sylvie (and the brilliant Sophia Di Martino) going forward in the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

turn down the lights and keep your ass in the chair - SPOOKY WEEK IS HERE 

I’ll keep watch