I was walking my dog today and this little boy stopped to pat her and was asking questions about her. He wanted to know where I got her and I said she was adopted from a shelter.
Boy: Have you told her yet? Me: What? Boy: Have you told her that she’s adopted? Me: Yes, she knows. Boy: That’s good, you should never keep a secret from a dog.
Completely understand
Duality
To all the relatives, “friends”, and random ass strangers who’ve been telling me since I was 16 that being 6′3″ made me too tall to wear dresses or find a guy willing to date a girl taller than him: My 5′2″ girlfriend loves when I wear dresses, thank you very much.
THIS IS THE CUTEST
There is something intensely fucked up about people telling tall girls these things, like as if it’s some sort of fault in their character that they are able to change.
Straight people out here shooting up their own fucking babies
this is the most white heterosexual nonsense ive ever seen
congrats! your smokebox was blue
this means you will birth a Denim Child
*Jild
I don’t understand why you are all so offended by this. They found out the genre of their baby by doing something they like to do. WHAT THE FUCK IS THE ISSUE HERE? WHY IS EVERYONE ON THIS WEBSITE SO HYPERSENSITIVE ABOUT EVERYONE ELSES LIVES. BACK TF OUT OF PEOPLES BUSINESS FOR FUCKS SAKE.
The genre of their baby
Easy Listening Baby
Smooth Jazz Baby
post-progressive dreamfunk baby
Honey do you see the dreamy blue hues rippling in the residue of the vaporized car? We’re having a vaporwave baby
ハヤテグッドボーイI N F A N T
>tfw no vaporwave baby
This post is a journey
i had to read through this post that already started off stressfully and now you do too
This probably some of the whitest American shit I’ve seen in a while 😂
In primary school when you and your friend would pretend to sharpen your pencils to have a chat at the bin
This is the most UK-centric sentence I’ve ever seen written
In primary school when you and your mate would pretend to sharpen your woody pointy writer-downers to have a jolly good chin wag at the bin
hey could you hold this for me a second *gives you my hand*
when you find that perfect gif but don’t know how to use it
You can reverse the flow of the hotdogs if you concentrate hard enough
oh my god you can
oh snap
REBLOG.
FOREVER.
This is an actual Therapist Recommended method for dealing with a runaway “inner critic” and this comic is perfect ❤️
i’m having an existential crisis
I am so sorry, but this is actually probably true. Plants co evolved to reward us for cultivating and propagating them. It’s called exorphin theory, and plants are pretty much just using us as their means of reproduction. That’s why humans show nearly every sign of species domestication. Have a good night, friend.
Trees are superior and I completely accept this.
I, for one, welcome our arboreal overlords.
“Time is just a human construct, it doesn’t exist!” No, measuring time in hours, minutes, and seconds is a human construct. Time still exists. We know this because the past has passed.
“Numbers are just a human cons–” Again, no, the names of numbers are a human construct, amounts of things still exist.
me flirting: which layer of hell do you think you’re going to?
Your asexuality is valid even if you’re 13
Your asexuality is valid even if you’re 80
Your asexuality is valid even if you’ve been sexually abused
Your asexuality is valid even if you’ve had sex before
Your asexuality is valid even if you’ve never tried sex
Your asexuality is valid even if you’re on the aromantic spectrum
Your asexuality is valid even if you’re NOT on the aromantic spectrum
Your asexuality is valid even if you like sex
Your asexuality is valid even if you’re neurodivergent
Your asexuality is valid.
you are worth it, please try your best to not let anyone else tell you otherwise
HOLY SHIT, IT WAS THE ORIGINAL ONE
MAKE A WISH
the first post ever on tumblr
I WAS EXPECTING IT TO BE A REMAKE OF SOME SORT HOLY FUCK
WHO THE FUCK KEEPS BRINGING THIS BACK
reblog this because it shows up every blue moon
I FOUND IT ✊
I WAS SO SCARED IT WOULDNT BE THE ORIGINAL
Who first posted this?
I THOUGHT THIS WAS GOING TO END WITH A MEME OR SOME SHIT NO IT’S THE REAL ONE OH MY GOD
Wishing I’ll do well on my finals ✨
