Setting Sail for Sexy Seas

Current Reductress headlines

Reopening meant that these people technically had their jobs back... Meaning that they could no longer collect unemployment. They were forced back to work and forcibly exposed to the virus.

Rage Against the Machine: “Weapons not food, not homes, not shoes. Not need, just feed the war cannibal animal”

Rage Against the Machine: “Those who died are justified, for wearing the badge, they’re the chosen whites”

Rage Against the Machine: “Dont dare take what you need I’ll jail and bury those committed and smother the rest in greed. Crawl with me into tomorrow or i’ll drag you to your grave"

Conservatives, for some reason:

Typing “bs” instead of bullshit is the most boomer thing ever.

Obama: U busy?

Harry: I’m shooting a perfume ad..

Obama: Is that the one i smelled on you last night? ;)

Harry:  Barack please……………i’ll see you later.

Obama: :D

cultural reset

recipe blogs are so exhausting. please dont say words at me just let me make my food in peace

i put gender in the wine… and the pasta

If i had to see this cursed food take so do the rest of you.

i still can’t believe this is real

those fucked animals in the ocean don’t give a damn about me or you

Oh, how I wish we lived in that centrist dream world, where all the anti-maskers fall to their knees and wail, “What have we done!  We have killed poor Herman, the noblest of us all!”

If only.

i’m reading why does he do that and this last part has been ON FIRE, i am hollering in my house.

Link to pdf

johnny cash high in a bush eating a cake / johnny cash thigh high boots

Miss thang

Ok miss legs

“Finally figured out how my tortoise was getting into the house all by himself!”

(Source)

only thing i agree with dads on is when it rains and they say ‘we needed that’ bc like. we did

it’s so wild to me that heterosexual people can talk about their first crushes when they were in elementary school and how they had their first awkward kiss at really young ages or they would chase boys on the playground to try and kiss them and that’s all fine and normal and cute but no one considers the fact that lgbt people experience this too like….i had elementary school-aged crushes on my girl friends and spent hours talking to them on the phone every day after school with butterflies in my stomach and together we daydreamed about throwing extravagant parties together and being movie stars or high-fashion models or pop stars or writers and together we held hands on the playground and kissed behind the trees in my backyard…the innocence of a childhood crush does not only exist for straight people….please stop seeing homosexuality as inherently sexual because when you do that, you are erasing all of the girls whose braids i memorized like a pattern and whose faces i can’t recall but still have love for and their stories deserve to be told and remembered and passed down like folk songs

person: girls can just be so.. urgh, you know?

me, a girl who loves and believes in other girls so much that i sometimes find it difficult to breathe: i do not recall, no