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A Dam Fangirl

@local-witch-of-mn / local-witch-of-mn.tumblr.com

I will post things without context. Sometimes I will. Let's see how I feel that day. please reblog my original posts I would love it for one of my posts to actually hit 100 notes
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gallusrostromegalus
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frownyalfred

Tips for writing those gala scenes, from someone who goes to them occasionally:

  • Generally you unbutton and re-button a suit coat when you sit down and stand up.
  • You’re supposed to hold wine or champagne glasses by the stem to avoid warming up the liquid inside. A character out of their depth might hold the glass around the sides instead.
  • When rich/important people forget your name and they’re drunk, they usually just tell you that they don’t remember or completely skip over any opportunity to use your name so they don’t look silly.
  • A good way to indicate you don’t want to shake someone’s hand at an event is to hold a drink in your right hand (and if you’re a woman, a purse in the other so you definitely can’t shift the glass to another hand and then shake)
  • Americans who still kiss cheeks as a welcome generally don’t press lips to cheeks, it’s more of a touch of cheek to cheek or even a hover (these days, mostly to avoid smudging a woman’s makeup)
  • The distinctions between dress codes (black tie, cocktail, etc) are very intricate but obvious to those who know how to look. If you wear a short skirt to a black tie event for example, people would clock that instantly even if the dress itself was very formal. Same thing goes for certain articles of men’s clothing.
  • Open bars / cash bars at events usually carry limited options. They’re meant to serve lots of people very quickly, so nobody is getting a cosmo or a Manhattan etc.
  • Members of the press generally aren’t allowed to freely circulate at nicer galas/events without a very good reason. When they do, they need to identify themselves before talking with someone.
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panakina

As someone who spent over a decade catering luxury events, let me add some back of house info:

  • These events are almost always open bar. They're not trying to make their money back on alcohol. They want you to drink and eat and donate generously.
  • If there are cocktails, there will be at most two on offer, pre-made in large tubs. You cannot order a different version, it is what it is.
  • There are two types of events: cocktail style or seated. The first includes roaming hors d'oeuvres or a fancy buffet with tiny plates called a grazing station. For a long night, the roaming food will get a little bigger throughout the evening and have a 'main' at some point based around a protein.
  • A seated event will usually be more structured and may include multiple courses. Silver service is not in vogue anymore. You are likely to get either alternating meals brought to you like at a wedding, or served banquet style. A good caterer can get a plate to everyone in a 300 person event in about three minutes.
  • Drunk people are the same no matter how expensive their suits. They still laugh too loud, spill their drinks and slip on the dance floor. They are usually less embarrassed about doing coke in the bathrooms.
  • A full scale event that starts at 6pm will have staff arriving at noon to begin setup. Earlier if there's a light show or pyrotechnics. Typically venues don't just have 30 tables and three hundred chairs lying around, let alone table cloths, chair covers, etc. It's all rented and brought in on the day. Bands and DJs will be running audio tests in the background throughout.
  • Most heritage buildings that host these things, like museums and manor houses, aren't really designed for them. They might put down mats so you're not walking in stilettos over two hundred year old wooden floors, the kitchens are weirdly far away, and there are not enough taps. There is never anywhere for staff to sit, so if you open the wrong door you might find half a dozen waiters sitting on upturned milk crates in a room full of million dollar paintings, eating the left over bread.
  • Really old buildings don't have enough bathrooms, which means the staff will be sharing with the guests.
  • Clean up starts the second the event ends, if not sooner. Unattended glasses will start to disappear first, then table decorations. When the timer ticks over, the lights come back on and exhausted staff strip the tables, pack up dirty glasses and unopened wine bottles and have to Tetris it all into the back of a van. The venue is booked for that day only, so everything has to be gone before anyone can go home. A large event that finishes at midnight might take until 3am to be cleared away.
  • These are very long and physically demanding nights for anyone working them. The staff all get to know each other, and will absolutely notice someone trying to sneak in wearing a borrowed uniform. They are not being paid enough to care.
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musicfeedsmysoul12
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pragnificent

This is Money Snake. She only appears every 312 years. 

If you reblog her picture within the next twenty-five seconds you will have good luck and fortune for the rest of your life. 

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thingsamylikes

I reblogged her late last year and my 2024 has been very satisfying work-wise and (secure enough to not stress out) money-wise so far. Money Snake is wise and good.

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reblogged
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tadpole-in-a-tuxedo

DEAR SWEET GOD

I WAS TRYING TO EDIT THIS GIF:

AND THIS MONSTROSITY HAPPENED

GOD ON HIGH HEAR MY PRAYER

this belongs in the beginning of the second deathnote opening

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the-haiku-bot

this belongs in the

beginning of the second

deathnote opening

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

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reblogged
esperata
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writing-in-the-grave

Hey y'all why are writers always cold?

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run-remi-run

…why?

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writing-in-the-grave

They’re always surrounded by drafts!

How many mystery writers does it take to change a lightbulb?

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run-remi-run

Oh god.

How many?

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writing-in-the-grave

Two! One to change the bulb, and the other to give it an unexpected twist at the end!

What do writers have for breakfast?

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run-remi-run

Coffee?

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writing-in-the-grave

Synonym buns!

Where do all the struggling writers live?

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run-remi-run

How are you coming up with all these?

Where?

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writing-in-the-grave

Writer’s Block!

What do writers suffer from each spring?

(I’ve heard a lot of them over the years.)

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run-remi-run

Allergies. Next question.

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writing-in-the-grave

you were close; A case of allegories

Why are writers always in great shape?

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run-remi-run

Circular prose

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writing-in-the-grave

Nope! It’s because we’re always running out of ideas!

Did you hear about the famous writer who turned out to be a fraud?

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run-remi-run

I did not

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writing-in-the-grave

His life had it’s prose and cons…

Why is editing a better job than writing?

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run-remi-run

It’s more rewording?

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writing-in-the-grave

Correct! I am out of jokes. :(

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reblogged
bunjywunjy
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ahedderick

Livestock drama

   “Let’s put pool noodles on the goat’s horns!” says a teenager.

“Why would you,   ” I begin, but they have already stampeded out of the house. I shrug.

   It turns out that when someone puts pool noodles on a goat’s horns, the goat doesn’t really care. They’re very light, after all, and she can’t see them. You know who cares? Who cares a LOT?

   the HORSE. Hero took one look at Nutmeg wearing pool noodles and ran away. You know who doesn’t want to be left alone, ever? Nutmeg. Who went trotting after Hero because he was leaving her.

   Hero, seeing that the eldritch abomination was after him, picked up speed. Nutmeg went into a full run. My kids started chasing Nutmeg to get the pool noodles off her, but could not catch her, because she’s surprisingly fast. The dogs were bringing up the rear, just happy to be going for a pleasant run. Hero was in a panic, leading a parade that he did not want.

   This all resolved. One noodle feel off; the kids eventually cornered Nutmeg and removed the other one. Just - a day at a farm, I guess.

10/02/20

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