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sarcasm is my only defense

@sunshineystilinski

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Take Me Seaside (For My Health)

B u c k y  B a r n e s  x  R e a d e r

Summary: Bucky Barnes is many things to you: friend, coworker, pain in your ass. When you get sick on a mission, he takes on another role—overbearing caretaker. A friends-to-lovers, TFATWS!Bucky sick fic. 
Author’s Note: My love, @divine-mistake​​, requested a Bucky sick fic a little while ago <3 This is a short and sweet lil thing (well, short for me lmao), and I hope you enjoy it!
Warning(s): cursing (as always), sickness/descriptions of flu-like sickness, mutual pining, idiots in love, poorly edited (again, as always)
Word Count: 4.7k

this might be the cutest thing i’ve ever read

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No Vacancies (1/2)

S t e v e  R o g e r s   x   R e a d e r

Summary: Running from nearly every government in the world is exhausting, and the cheap motel beds aren’t exactly a refuge for rest. There’s little solace on the road except for what you can find in Steve’s arms at night, and now even that’s grown complicated. A friends-with-benefits-to-lovers nomad!Steve reader-insert. Listen to the playlist here.
Author’s Note: I don’t know how to shut up, so I decided to cut this one shot into two parts. Part two coming later tonight!! Likes/reblogs/messages always welcome (and never cease to make my day!), but please do not repost my work as your own. 
Warning(s): 18+, Minors DNI, smut, smut, smut!!!, angst and feelings, nomad!Steve is the sexiest Steve, poorly edited (as always lmao)
Word Count: 6.3k

wow. i just. the angst and pain and just wow. i loved it

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Security Deposit

B u c k y   B a r n e s   x   R e a d e r

Summary: Bucky Barnes was a romantic, sure—but a hopeless romantic? He’d never believed in the whole ‘love-at-first-sight’ thing, not before the war and certainly not now. So when he stumbles into his building, fresh out of yet another demoralizing therapy session, to find his new neighbor blocking the stairs with her mattress, he should be his usual scoffing, unamused self—right? Everything changes with her (and that mattress).
Author’s Note: This is based on a request @flightsandfantasy​ sent in for my 300 follower celebration! The choices were Neighbor AU with love at first sight, domestic fluff, and oblivious idiots in love tropes with “I may have just wanted a reason to hold your hand” as the dialogue prompt. Again, this is only my second time ever writing smut, so please be gentle with me <3 If you have any feedback, I’d love to hear it! (As always, likes/reblogs/comments/messages are welcome and appreciated!!!)
Warning(s): 18+, MINORS DNI, cursing, alcohol consumption, lots of fluff, smut!!!
Word Count: 11k (forgive me, pls)

whole heartedly believe you read my mind because this fic was posted the minute i was feeling sad wow😭😭

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Just a Glimmer (13/?)

Summary: After an eventful, alcohol-fueled night, Bucky and reader make the long trip back to the cabin. Coffee is consumed. Snacks are eaten. Teasing ensues. Confrontation, and much more, hangs in the air. 
Author’s Note: The fact that I wrote this while hungover… *chef’s kiss*!! That’s what I call writing from experience! Sorry for the delay in posting—struggling with a lot right now, and writing is hard even when my brain’s not foggy. I’m also trying out a new format for my fics—let me know what you think! As always, likes/reblogs/comments are appreciated <3 Hope y’all enjoy!! (Also, when I tell you I STRUGGLED writing this chapter, I mean it lmao I hope y’all can’t tell oops)
Warning(s): 18+, MINORS DNI, mentions of alcohol, mentions of sexual activity, cursing as usual, poorly edited (lol)
Word Count: 6.8k

now that i have slept, i would like to add that this was so beyond amazing. literally so in love with this fic

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With the Snap of a Finger

B u c k y   B a r n e s   x    R e a d e r

Summary: Bucky Barnes is a selfish, reclusive asshole who never answers the phone. When John Walker takes up the shield, he emerges from his Brooklyn apartment in a fit of rage that drives the only two people left to care about him in this post-Snap world over the edge. It all comes to a head on trip to Germany. Includes spoilers for TFATWS, episode two. 
Requested by @buckybby as part of my 300 follower celebration! (Selected AU: Canon-Compliant. // Selected Tropes: Enemies-to-Lovers // Fluff // There Was Only One Bed! // Selected Dialogue: “For the love of God, please go to bed.“)
Author’s Note: Okay, I’m kinda freaking out about posting this because it’s my first time ever writing anything even remotely smutty sjfkefewl lmao but I feel like this turned out better than I hoped going into it!! so enjoy, my beloveds <33
Warning(s): 18+, MINORS DNI, cursing, smut, resolved angst, fluff
Word Count: 8.2k

“Oh, my god,” you groan, taking the phone from Bucky’s gloved hands. “How many times do I have to tell you? People get notified when you like their photos.”

“I didn’t ‘like’ the photo,” he insists, his lips turned downward.

“Yes, you did.” You raise the phone’s screen to him, pointing to the little red heart. “You double-tapped the photo, which means you liked it.”

“Well, that’s just stupid,” he says, crossing his arms against his chest. “Who came up with that?”

“Mark Zuckerburg, man,” Sam calls out from the couch. “I told you to watch The Social Network.”

“He doesn’t watch anything we suggest,” you tell Sam, taking screenshots of everything you can on the Flag Smasher’s Instagram page before they connect the dots and go private—or delete their account all together. “All he does is watch soccer.”

“What’s wrong with soccer?”

“Been trying to invite you over to watch a Saints game for how long, and you’ve just been holed up in that little apartment watching soccer?”

Bucky licks at his lips, parting them to no doubt direct his irritation at Sam, when you get a notification.

Fuck.”

wow. no words. just wow. i just- wow. yeah.

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Just a Glimmer (12/?)

Summary: The reader is an enhanced individual, gifted with the ability to teleport herself. Newly recruited to the Avengers initiative, she’s given her first assignment: find Bucky Barnes. This series begins in 2015, before the events of CA: CW, and will end following the events of Avengers: Endgame. (The timeline might get a bit non-canonical later on, but it will follow pretty dang closely with the MCU timeline.)

Author’s Note: I struggled a bit with the pacing of this chapter (and it’s def not well edited lmao), but I was internally screaming writing the end of it, so I hope you all enjoy!!! <333 (Your reblogs/comments/messages are always encouraged and soooo appreciated, angels!! Your feedback is what keeps me goin’!!!)

Warning(s): 18+, Minors DNI, canon-level violence, alcohol consumption, cursing, a lil angst 

Word Count: 10.3k (lmaooooo I am insane)

The sudden flooding of light is a harsh wake up call against your eyelids. The squeak of curtains being pushed against a rusty rod stirs you from sleep, and you squint your eyes further shut against the light and the noise, burying your face deeper into your pillow with a groan.

“Come on,” Bucky pulls the covers from your body, and the cool air of the motel room is a chilling sting against the warmth of your skin. “You slept through breakfast.”

“I don’t want breakfast,” you whine, rolling on your side to face away from him and the stream of light coming in through the open blinds. “I just want sleep.”

“You did sleep,” he tells you. “Slept for twelve whole hours, actually.”

“Sounds fair considering I drove for a whole twelve hours,” you grumble.

He crosses the room to sit beside you on the bed, extending a paper cup to you as a peace offering for disturbing your rest. “Here, it’s coffee. You look like you could use it.”

Pushing yourself up on your elbows, you shoot him a look you intend to be menacing but he only laughs.

Bringing the cup to your lips, you take a tentative sip and shut your eyes against the warmth that channels down your throat and into your belly. “I didn’t realize how much I missed sleeping in a bed—that couch has been killing my back.”

jesus. my heart is on the floor. this is exactly what i needed tonight. she did it again.

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Just a Glimmer (11/?)

Summary: The reader is an enhanced individual, gifted with the ability to teleport herself. Newly recruited to the Avengers initiative, she’s given her first assignment: find Bucky Barnes. This series begins in 2015, before the events of CA: CW, and will end following the events of Avengers: Endgame.
Author’s Note: Thanks for being patient with me!! I ended up cutting this chapter off earlier than I originally intended (it was getting way too long for one update lol oops), so the next part should be out by this weekend! I promise more action and powers and excitement is coming, but for now, we will all scream together at this slowest of burns :,) 
Warning(s): 18+, Minors DNI, mentions of cancer, mentions of amputation (no descriptions)
Word Count: 6.8k

“Absolutely not,” he shakes his head insistently. “I’m not going in there.”

“You have to,” you tell him, your own voice heavy with the same stubbornness that plagues him.

“And remind me why that is again?”

You huff. “Border Patrol will probably look at my doctored passport and just wave me on through. Glimmer isn’t exactly the most popular superhero,” you tell him. “But almost everyone knows you. They’re not going to miss the Winter freakin’ Soldier sitting in my passenger seat.”

His eyes are glued to your face as he mulls over your words, that muscle in his jaw twitching as it often did when he was agitated by something. Glancing over at the hidden stowaway compartment in the carpet of the SUV just behind your driver’s seat, he groans before shifting on his feet.

“All right,” he concedes, trudging past you and climbing to the car through the back door. As he ducks into its interior, his waist bending slightly to accommodate his large frame, you do worry how he’ll fit into the compartment.

He carries the same worry, as evidenced by the furrowing of his brow, as he lowers himself down into it, situating himself flat on his back. The compartment is just long enough to allow him to fit, the bottoms of his feet sitting flush with the hilt of it. His mouth settles into a straight, unamused line as he watches you from where you’ve climbed into the car’s back seats to enclose him.

“I’m sorry,” you tell him sincerely, though you can’t help the bite of amusement in your tone.

He notices it and narrows his eyes. “No, you aren’t.”

once again, to no shock, i am amazed. wow.

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Just a Glimmer (10/?)

Summary: The reader is an enhanced individual, gifted with the ability to teleport herself. Newly recruited to the Avengers initiative, she’s given her first assignment: find Bucky Barnes. This series begins in 2015, before the events of CA: CW, and will end following the events of Avengers: Endgame.
Author’s Note: Good evening, angels! <3 Wooo, we’re at TEN chapters—a milestone for this fic! Thanks so much to everyone who has stuck with me through these last ten chapters. I sooo appreciate your readership and your comments and feedback and love. I really fckin love you guys. That’s all.
Warning(s): 18+ only, minors DNI, alcohol use, allusion to masterbation, characters play Cards Against Humanity which is an incredibly raunchy game, allusion to canon-level violence
Word Count: 6.6k

It’s another warm day, the third in a row this week. There’s the faintest hint of a breeze in the air, and you watch as it picks up a piece of Bucky’s hair where it had been hanging like a curtain in front of his face. The wind gently draws the strand away from his temple, giving you a better view of the way his eyebrows knit together in focus.

His tongue darts out to wet his lips as he continues to write furiously in the pages of his notebook. “Quit staring at me,” he tells you gruffly, eyes still tracking the languid tip of his pen.

“Oh, you’re one to talk about staring,” you huff, the sound of it as light and as airy as the day around you. He ignores your comment, hunching his shoulders further downward over the book in his lap.

Craning your neck to peer around him, you see Steve leaned up against a tree near the water, his sketchbook poised upright in his palms. Seeing him like that, a look of contentment spread across his features, sent a burst of warmth spreading through your chest. You imagined that maybe this is a glimpse of what Steve Rogers had looked like before the war, before so much sacrifice and loss and grief.

Behind you, the sounds of tools scraping against metal and wires meets your ears from the porch. Without turning around to spare a glance, you know Sam would be there, as he always was, working tediously away at Redwing or his own suit’s mechanical wings. He hums out a sweet melody between his lips as he works, the sound of it having served as the backdrop for your lessons with Bucky over the last two weeks.

i have never read something so perfect. i’m in love.

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