As most people know, I started my freshman year of college this past August. And I have to say, there have been ups and downs like no other. Let's start at the beginning. The week we moved here was an adventure. Classes didn't start until the following week, so it was the perfect time to meet new people. My roommate, Lacey, was the first person I got to meet. She is an amazing person. We have a lot of the same interests, including band, SuperWhoLock, and laughing until we almost pee ourselves. She had a friend from RBC (a camp that let students meet fellow freshman) that lived downstairs from us. We went to visit and that's where our Ohana begin. I met Annie, Alec, Nick, Jesse, Heather, Emily, Brooke, and a few more that evening. We all became very close friends, almost like family (which is where Ohana fits in) from the start. That week, I met someone who became so close to me, I could've sworn for a slight second I fell in love. His name is Jacob. He was so shy, but so sweet. He kept to himself, but he knew how to make us all laugh. His musical talents made him that much more intersting. He can sing, play guitar, and play piano. He and I had a lot of the same upcomings growing up and we became best friends overnight. Throughout the week, Jacob and I hung out all the time. He made it very clear he wasn't looking to date anyone at the moment, but he also made it clear that he liked me just as much as I liked him. He would come to my dorm and stay up until 3:00 in the morning just talking to me. He'd play guitar and sing for me, he would watch movies, I played with his hair and he played with mine. Once we walked around the town until 4:00, just laughing and singing and having a blast. Jacob and I were in a "flirtationship" for about a month. We dropped friends and welcomed more in. Things were changing fast, but not all changes are good. Within the month of September, I realized college would NOT be so easy, especially for a music education major. My grades were great and all, but the classes were difficult. Everyone knows I can't sing, everyone knows it takes a while to learn a new instrument (Piano), and the teachers are not good at explaining things. For example, my piano instructor. He wrote the book that we learn piano from, so he expects to hear everything he wrote down perfectly. Well, NEWS FLASH! Not everyone can play piano perfectly after 3 months. And then there's my English teacher. I've been in Comp I for 3 months now and I've done 2 essays. That's it. Nothing more. My class complains when we have an essay due so he pushes the date back further and further and further. He's way too laid back. But some teachers have been pretty great too. My Harmony and Aural Theory teachers are so much fun. We laugh and have a great time in these classes everyday. My Strategies class is so easy! My teacher doesn't care when or even if we turn in the work, so guess who is done with that class early! Oh and my band director is the best! He really gets into the music he chooses for us. He loves his job and he shows it so well. Remember those downs I talked about? Well, since the middle of September, college became a drag. Let's start with Jacob (because he's the reason it all started). Jacob came to my room one night because he wanted, what he called, attention. He also needed to do his homework, so I let him come up so I could do it with him. He read his book as I kept choosing music for us to listen to. Around 2:00, he finished his work and was super tired, as well as I was. Why it went downhill was because of this: Jacob asked me if I have ever kissed anyone. Immediately, I was shocked but answered with a "Duh". I asked him as well, and he also answered yes. He looked at my lips and I looked at his. We kissed and it was the most passionate kiss ever. Sparks flew, angels sung, everything you can imagine in a perfect kiss. That night, he cuddled me in his sleep. When I would move my right hand, he'd grab it and pull it back to his heart. Though the beds are tiny, we slept so soundly. My alarm went off at 8:00 the next morning. He shot up as well as I did. I walked him downstairs, but when we got to the front door he left without a word. Since then, Jacob and I haven't hung out. We haven't really talked or anything. He hardly says "Hi" to me anymore. I found out a few days ago he quit being a music major, joined a fraternity, and completely changed who he was. The same sweet, musical man I fell in love with is gone. I have never felt like this with anyone until I met Jacob. To this day, part of me is still hanging on hoping he'll go back to the way he was. Until then, I'll stay heartbroken. Now when it comes to my friends, there's more drama than I thought. Let's start with the fact that our friend group went from about 17 to 7. Everyone left. Lacey, Brooke, Annie, Jesse, Heather, Gibbs, and myself are all that's left. There's also a lot of negativity in the group. Heather is the source of it all. She thinks her opinion is either correct or right (I know they're the same). But when she states her opinion, it's always something negative. With Annie and Jesse, it's just one big sex drive that never stops. Brooke is still good, and I love being with her. Gibbs is the new guy in the group. He's sweet, but if he thinks anyone is flirting with him, he'll tell you 1,000 times he has a girlfriend. Believe me I know, he made it very clear even though I wasn't at all flirting with him. Lacey is still good, sometimes. Like tonight for instance. I'm literally typing this from a table at a restaurant because her choir friends decided not to include me at all. I rode with a few of them to a recital and since then, all they've done is ignore and push me away. I mean, I love Lacey like she's my sister. But sometimes I feel like she invites me to things with her friends because she feels bad that I'm sitting alone in the dorm watching YouTube. I have a life, I swear. I just like to take relaxing time for myself sometimes. Anyway, that's basically it for my first 3 months of college. I'll try to update more. Bye y'all~
