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Thinking Too Much

@unfavorableinstigation / unfavorableinstigation.tumblr.com

Librarian on the rural Canadian prairies. Graying. Morbid curiosity is my hamartia. I keep most of the librarian stuff on @liprarian.
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Tag urself I'm Tiddy Skittles

Guys I found the FUCKING article have it

Ashley, F. (2019). Surgical informed consent and recognizing perioperative duty to disclose in transgender health care. McGill Journal of Law and Health, 13(1), 73-116

The author is transfeminine themselves and this bit was in a FOOTNOTE. They had NO OBLIGATION to give this information and they are the funniest person on this fucking planet

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floral-ashes

I’m glad people are enjoying it! I totally wrote the footnote for shits and giggles, adding it during revisions. Academic funnies is something I try to do as much as I can, because academia is often too dull for my taste: https://www.facebook.com/florence.a.pare/posts/10223888512340696

It’s hilarious that it has legit 132k notes lol

How am I just finding out about you

ok but have y'all seen their writing on surgery:

Forthcoming in the prestigious McGill Law Journal. ✨

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I think I stumbled upon some kind of ichthyological forbidden knowledge. Opened up a book of names that were never meant to be read.

You've probably heard of "can-opener smoothdream", right? It's practically a meme by now.

But the thing is, it's a deep-sea fish. And deep-sea fish have historically not had English names because nobody drops them into the conversation over a hot cuppa. Sure, there's generic stuff like hatchetfish and barreleye, but when you want to refer to the actual fish you're probably saying such euphonious phrases as Diretmus argenteus, Sternoptyx diaphana, or maybe even Opisthoproctus soleatus.

So whence "can-opener smoothdream"? Certainly no non-ichthyologist has ever used that name. It's not even a direct translation of the scientific name Chaenophryne longiceps - that would be "long-headed gape-toad". Which to me is even cooler than "can-opener smoothdream".

But I digress. The "dream" bit comes from the anglerfish family Oneirodidae, from oneiros, "dream", because those marvelous fishes look like they came out of a dream (Pietsch, 2009).

Note that Pietsch (2009), more or less the anglerfish bible, uses English names at the genus level only. So Chaenophryne is the smoothhead dreamers genus but no mention is made of "can-opener smoothdreams". So no luck there.

Wikipedia, root cause of a lot of misinformation, has this to say.

"Longhead dreamer" is a far more accurate name. And in fact, despite Wikipedia prioritizing "can-opener smoothdream" (because it's funny?), the links listed use "longhead dreamer" and "smoothhead dreamer" as the name and "can-opener smoothdream" as an alternative.

So. Again. Where did "can-opener smoothdream" come from?

The answer, as it turns out, lies with McAllister (1990).

In the book A List of the Fishes of Canada, ichthyologist D. E. McAllister sought out to list every single fish known to Canadian waters, providing both an English and a French name.

And when there wasn't an English name, like for most deep-sea fishes, he arbitrarily gave them a name. And his names "differ in many instances from the widely accepted names" (Holm, 1998)

This had varying results. This is his name for one of the netdevil anglerfishes.

The humpback anglerfish or blackdevil anglerfish becomes a werewolf (????).

This one is just confusing.

The white-spotted lanternfish or Rafinesque's lanternfish instead becomes...

And most embarrassingly, the Mediterranean spiderfish gets saddled with something that "violates the tenet of good taste" (Holm, 1998).

This then is the original source of "can-opener smoothdream". It was invented by an ichthyologist in 1990, and has seen little to no use outside of how bizarre the name is.

Maybe McAllister's goofier names will catch on. Who knows? They certainly aren't very popular in the scientific community though.

References

Holm, E. (1998) Encyclopedia of Canadian Fishes (review). The Canadian Field-Naturalist, 112, p. 174-175.

McAllister, D. E. (1990) A List of the Fishes of Canada. National Museum of Natural Sciences, Ottawa.

Pietsch, T. W. (2009) Oceanic Anglerfishes: Extraordinary Diversity in the Deep Sea. University of California Press, Berkeley.

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bunjywunjy
Anonymous asked:

monarchy sucks as a social system but i suppose it would be funny if royally-named animals got more democratic names. renaming the emperor penguin and monarch butterfly into the president penguin and the democratic butterfly

prime minister penguin has a really nice ring to it, actually. societal anarchy butterfly may need some workshopping though

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The provincial governor butterfly, the local community organizer butterfly, captain butterfly, the I. Ron Butterfly th

Social anarchfly

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Thinking of the larger context of LOTR and like, the fellowship swapping old war stories and shit and Sam just says “Yeah I killed a huge spider…Shelob, I think?”

And Gandalf just blinks and is like, “You what now?”

“Yeah, killed it. Had to save Frodo”

Gandalf elects not to tell Sam that he killed the spawn of a primordial demon.

the daughter of the embodiment of darkness which ate the original sun and moon and almost ate the devil.

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matrixdragon

That's not important. What is important is that it was a danger to Mister Frodo.

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*places an orange just outside a fairy ring to see what comes out* science is more of an art than a science

*the orange grows legs and skitters away*

Fascinating results *places a banana in the same spot*

*clawed hand reaches out of the ether and drags it into the ring, leaving ragged claw marks in the soil as it disappears, back into the ether from whence it came*

“let’s go to the extreme.” *places a pineapple in the same spot*

Real scientists would keep putting an orange in the same spot to make sure the results are consistent before moving on to other fruits or different spots.

The only valid response to this post.

We’re working up the complexity levels of fruit until we feel there is enough evidence to support the judicious placement of a volunteer twink

You sit down, we haven’t seen what’s happened to the pineapple

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bunjywunjy

Hi I just learnt that grebe the bird existed and I am intrigued do you have any knowledge to drop on the dudes

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BOY DO I! grebes are my favorite waterfowl!

they're specialist divers and fish hunters, and they're a pretty wide group with a LOT of species!

and they're all freaks. every single one of them.

they're most closely related to FLAMINGOS, of all things, which is why their feet are so weird! they evolved completely separate from other waterfowl like ducks and geese, so they did the flipper thing totally backwards.

this is going to be a theme, nothing these birds do is normal.

unlike other specialist diving birds (coughcough LOONS coughcough), they aren't totally incompetent on land! just, again. total freaks about it.

aaagh I love them so much I might actually explode

also they swim like frogs, babies can dive pretty much immediately after hatching, and adults can minutely adjust their buoyancy in the water at will like a fucking submarine. you just can't make any of this shit up.

weirdest fucking bird 100/10

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[Sandry] dragged her workbasket over. Fumbling, she yanked out three coils of silk, one green, one pale gray, one bright red. [Sandry's Book, Chapter 1]

She braids these three threads together on the next page, and braids light into them to use as a lamp.

These three colors are, of course, thematically representative of Briar, Tris, and Daja. The go-to color for Tris fluctuates a bit (in Daja's Book, it's blue if I remember correctly?), but green and red are pretty consistent for Briar and Daja.

Thematically, not literally, this is the first time Sandry binds the kids together. She's missing a crucial component - herself - and the light in the braid eventually goes out. The next time she, literally not thematically, binds them together, she includes herself, and boy does that magic last.

Am I reading way to much into a single quote in a children's novel? Absolutely, but this is what this reread is all about.

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mosslingg

someone with a major in literature and/or poetry tell me what's so poetic about this that it captivated me because i have no idea honestly

hey. what if i just cried on a train. what if.

Is this your type of thing @amtrak-official?

That flower is so pretty and so strong, it's indomitable

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dduane

Even if they say it can't be done...try flowering where you are.

Especially if they say it can't be done. :)

It’s interesting to see this in the framework of a flower (politically defined as: charming, pretty, femme, frivolous, victim) and/or a weed (politically: outsider, indomitable, back-to-nature, resistance, rebellion) and seeing it as a slightly underdog, “nature thriving in adversity” “beauty thriving in industry” “persistence and hope” story. It is and it isn’t! It’s still poetry.

This looks like oilseed rape, a crop plant that provides a bright yellow field of flowers. The flowers become the seeds that are pressed to make a cheap and common cooking oil. Rapeseed is considered a mildly unattractive name so it was rebranded as “canola,” thus the product of oilseed rape is canola oil. Still, a field of these yellow flowers is somewhat awkwardly called a field of rape. The heavy, sweet scent hovers for miles. The United States Canola Association, a lobby professional advocate for the plant , says “the small yellow flowers [also] beautify the environment,” as they try to market something that doesn’t need much marketing.

Rapeseed is hot at the moment - carrying a heavy load. The obviously competitive plant-based oils at the moment - olive oil and sunflower oil - are both embroiled in geopolitics. Sunflower oil was dominated in global production by Ukraine, currently under invasion, and olive oil - a key export of Palestine, and the European trees smashed hard in recent years by the droughts - is a tricky product that relies on ancient little olive trees growing in climate-change-affected deserts in years of unprecedented bad weather. It takes years for an olive tree to make a single olive. So geopolitically, people are clinging a bit to rapeseed - a sturdy and unbothered workhorse of the temperate climates.

Rapeseed’s a brassica, part of the same family as those shape-shifting sisters who are all Basically The Same Plant: broccoli, cabbage, mizuna, pak choi, turnip, cauliflower, Brussels sprouts - let any of those sisters go over, and they’ll all develop the same cheerful yellow flowers. Oilseed rape has an instant and obvious kinship with them. The thick, dusty slightly blueish color to the fat juicy stem and the broad leaves on the bottom giving way to the smaller ones along the distinctive stalk - you can ID a brassica from just a few characters!

Brassicas, most amusingly, like hard going. One wild ancestral brassica, to whom the broccoli sisters strive to return, is Wild Cabbage - it likes to live on rocky sea cliffs, growing on rocks and battered by salt; sea kales, another offshoot of the family, like to grow on beaches. If you see plants growing on a beach, drinking saltwater and digging their roots into sand and rocks, they’re brassicas - that’s it - that is how they like it. It’s completely mad! but it works for them! Other plants probably make memes about brassicas: choosing what is (to plants) a barren alien landscape, whipped by toxic winds, drinking poison, gnawing sustenance from actual sand - and then being so vigorous and juicy, and carefully constructing a crown of yellow flowers. Absolutely wild!

Rapeseed, therefore, scorns the idea that it has to be kept locked up in a comfortable field and farmed. When it leaves its fields and starts wandering, it is called an “escape” - a cultivated plant that’s gotten away. Escaped rapeseed yearns for the beach, or at the very least, the romantic dusty road. It usually lives alongside roads, on waste ground, and in other places where it can find gravel: as you can see, this includes perching jauntily in the gravel of train tracks. Wind? Rocks? Trains? Are you kidding? This is not adversity to oilseed rape. This is what it leaves home for. It’s going to the beach. It’s LEAVING. Farewell, suckers.

In general, people do not actually like this.

Escapes aren’t quite invasive - although that term itself is a little tricky; if the photo is taken in Europe, an escaped brassica has every right to say that it’s had ten thousand years of being perfectly native - but they’re still not-really-wild and would-you-please-stop. An escaped food crop is not the cute underdog kind of weed, not the political lapel pin kind of weed, not the oh-look-it’s-thriving-in-adversity-feeding-the-bees.

Environmentalists don’t want them. They’re not weeds in the sense of Daddy-hated-the-pretty-dandelions-in-the-lawn-wasn’t-Daddy-mean, they’re weeds in the sense of one-step-further-out-of-place-and-you’re-spoiling-the-whole-ecosystem-bucko. The politics of invasiveness hold a finger over the button that says “condemn,” and the moment the rapeseed escape leaves the undisputed unwanted waste ground, it becomes a weed in the sense of deleted-for-the-greater-good. As long as they’re in the waste ground that nobody wants, it’s fine - but watch out! The tolerance is very conditional.

But is it (politically) weed, (politically) flower? I’m always interested in the political projections we put onto plants. This, to me, is funny, like a cow at IKEA; a fancy breed of chicken ordering a drink at a bar. Somebody escaped the grind. Somebody is off to the beach. Farm boy escaping to the bright lights over here. How are you going to keep them down on the farm when they’ve seen gay Paree! It isn’t starving or struggling baby, that’s oilseed rape seeking enrichment! Don’t feel bad for it! It’s escaped! It likes this shit! It’ll be shot down by farmers or environmentalists alike - you’re it’s only friend. Don’t tattle on it, it’s not meant to be here, it barely even Feeds the Bees. It’s taking the midnight train going anywhere!

That’s no delicate flower! That’s a brassica! They’re from the EQUIVALENT OF THE MOON. That’s one of the oldest plant allies we have! And not even because they taste particularly good (debatable) just because we can’t stop them and it’s better to be allies than victims, really. It’s awfully pretty and funny to be flowering (love that for it) but it isn’t precisely in adversity, the mad bastard! it’s about as uncomfortable there as a cottagecore influencer.

That’s no weed! It ain’t the wild! That’s a purebred domestic farmchild with ten thousand of years of genetic engineering behind it! It’s more domesticated than YOU are. And it’s going on holiday. Becoming ungovernable.

It could be a villain! We don’t know! The seeds from that plant - which are happening because it was fit enough to flower- just might get on a train that takes them to INVADE A NEW ECOSYSTEM bahahahahaha! What matters is going on your WAY.

To me it’s the poetry of spotting a friend, the recognition of seeing a dog. The humor of a fancy fluffy chicken living its life. The pleasure in seeing a brassica living in conditions that are a bit like its ancestral wild. The enjoyment of having a bit of knowledge, like hearing a bird song and being able to tell someone, wisely, that it’s a chiff-chaff because it says chiff-chaff. A reminder, once more, that the natural world is full of infinite stories to tell and be told: the most worthy stories that there are. The poetry of it. I don’t see triumph-in-adversity, but a guy having fun. I see human engineering hanging out with human engineering. I see classic brassica behavior. Classic. What a guy. What a legend.

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catchymemes

Callsigns are ALL like this. I know in movies everyone's got cool callsigns, but you have to EARN a cool callsign. Most people's are like, commemoration of something real stupid they did, or, like, "Carrots" bc "he ate carrots weirdly." This database is a treasure trove:

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