nobody fucking says pop

I FEEL THIS ON A SPIRITUAL LEVEL

Reminder of why Laure is my spirit animal

This is the most useless fucking map I’ve ever seen and I love it. I want to print it out and put it on my wall. 

8 vegetables that you can regrow again and again.

Scallions

You can regrow scallions by leaving an inch attached to the roots and place them in a small glass with a little water in a well-lit room.

Garlic

When garlic begins to sprout, you can put them in a glass with a little water and grow garlic sprouts. The sprouts have a mild flavor than garlic and can be added to salads, pasta and other dishes.

Bok Choy

Bok choy can be regrown by placing the root end in water in a well-lit area. In 1-2 weeks , you can transplant it to a pot with soil and grow a full new head.

Carrots

Put carrot tops in a dish with a little water. Set the dish in a well-lit room or a window sill.  You’ll have carrot tops to use in salads. 

Basil

Put clippings from basil with 3 to 4-inch stems in a glass of water and place it in direct sunlight. When the roots are about 2 inches long, plant them in pots to and in time it will grow a full basil plant.

Celery

Cut off the base of the celery and place it in a saucer or shallow bowl of warm water in the sun. Leaves will begin to thicken and grow in the middle of the base, then transfer the celery to soil. 

Romaine Lettuce

Put romaine lettuce stumps in a ½ inch of water. Re-water to keep water level at ½ inch. After a few days, roots and new leaves will appear and you can transplant it into soil.

Cilantro

The stems of cilantro will grown when placed in a glass of water. Once the roots are long enough, plant them in a pot in a well-lit room. You will have a full plant in a few months.

Get your infinite food exploit out of here you cheater. People like you ruin the survival horror experience.

Something to remember!

Just about every joke in Avatar: The Last Airbender is peak comedy but conceptually my favorite moment is that scene in The Waterbending Scroll where Zuko’s crew was fighting some pirates and Aang was lost in the middle of a smoke cloud.

Now, Aang being an Airbender, the logical thing to do would be to blow the smoke away, which he does.

This would be funny enough in and of itself, but what really gets me is that Aang just nopes his way out of the situation by… Calling the smoke back?

Like on top of this being the literal only instance of an aerokinetic character blowing smoke away in reverse (not the same thing as kicking up a cloud of dust) just… everyone who was fighting just goes back to fighting each other like that didn’t just happen? Like they didn’t just see the Avatar- who they’re fighting over- is no longer tied up?

This five seconds of animation is just the most beautifully hilarious mess.

Ha ha seriously tho.

I needed to hear this right now. <3

My new favorite post.

I let her have the little bit of peanutbutter that was left. She looked at me like I gave her the world.

Relevant gif is relevant

Relevant gif is relevant

Not sure why this park thought the first two sign language words they needed to teach to kids were “Ghost” and “Run”

Source

back the fuck up

There’s another story that I like about a Chinese general who had to defend a city with only a handful of soldiers from a huge enemy horde that was in all likelihood going to steamroll the place flat within hours of showing up.

So when said horde did arrive, they saw the general sitting outside the city’s open gates, drinking tea. The horde sent a couple of emissaries over to see what was what, and the general greeted them cheerfully and invited them all to come and take tea with him.

The horde decided that this was a scenario that had “MASSIVE FUCKING TRAP” written all over it in beautiful calligraphy and promptly fucked off.

Whoever that general was, he was clearly the Ancient Chinese equivalent of Sam Vimes.

did he just invite us over for tea nah man i’m out

This just keeps getting better

I fucking love history.

ok but tbh that story misses a lot of the subtlety of the situation like ok

so this story is the Romance of Three Kingdoms, and essentially takes place between Zhuge Liang, resident tactician extraordinaire, and Sima Yi… OTHER resident tactician extraordinaire.

The two were both regarded as tactical geniuses and recognized the other as their rival. Zhuge Liang had a reputation for ambushing the SHIT out of his opponents and using the environment to his advantage, thus destroying large armies with a small number of men. Sima Yi (who kind of entered the picture later) was a cautious person whose speciality was unravelling his opponent’s plans before they began. So it was natural that the two would butt heads; however, since Sima Yi tended to have more men and resources, he started winning battles against the former. Which, y’know, kinda sucked.

On to the actual story: Zhuge Liang is all like “shit i gotta defend this city with like 10 men.” Literally if he fights ANY kind of battle here, he WILL lose; his only option for survival is not to fight. And that’s looking more and more impossible until he hears that his rival is leading the opposing army. And then he gets this brilliant idea. He basically opens all the gates, sends his men out in civilian clothes to sweep the streets, and sits on top of the gate drinking tea and chilling out and basically makes the whole thing out to be a trap

When Sima Yi comes he’s all like “yo come on in bro”

and Sima Yi is like “yeah he’s never been that obvious about his traps before. this is definitely a bluff” and he’s about to head in when he realizes

wait. he knows that i think he’s bluffing.

and so he gets it in his head that maybe, just MAYBE, Zhuge Liang has this cunning plan that will wipe out his army - recall that he has a pretty good handle on what his rival is capable of. And after a long period of deliberation (which is just like “he know that I know that he knows that etc.”), being the cautious man he is, SIma Yi eventually decides to turn his entire army around and leave.

Zhuge Liang later points out that the plan was based specifically on the fact that he was facing his rival; if it had been anyone else, there’s no way it would have worked. A dumber or less cautious person would have simply charged in and won without breaking a sweat. 

and that’s the real genius here: it was a plan formed entirely just to deceive one man, and it worked.

Zhuge Liang is the most brilliant, sneaky-ass bastard in history. One time his side’s army was out of arrows, which pretty much meant they were screwed. So Zhuge Liang goes and does the logical thing, which is build a fuck ton of scarecrows and put them all on boats. Then he makes the men hide in the boats and sail them out on the river.

Well, that day was super foggy (which Zhuge Liang had predicted. Did I mention he was also a freakishly accurate meteorologist?). So the enemy across the river sees a fleet of boats armed to the teeth with what appears to be half an army of men. They panic! and start firing arrows like crazy. 

Zhuge Liang lets this play out for a while, then he’s like, ”Ok guys that’s enough.” They calmly turn the boats around and go back to base, where they dismantle the scarecrows and pull out all the enemy’s arrows.

Zhuge Liang is legend.

I love this post. It just keeps getting better. Like seriously, I would have adored learning about this in World History.

If you want to see this in cinematic glory, watch Red Cliff.

Especially since it makes Zhuge Liang look like this:

Red Cliff is 50% bloody battles and 50% eye candy and about half of that eye-candy is due to Zhuge Liang

@admiraloblivious we’re finding this movie and watching it asap

Ffffff-

Hey, hey guys!! guess what? 

Do you ever see a post that you agree with on some level, but it’s worded in an aggressive and mean-spirited way, so you’re just kind of

the cis are getting out of hand

fucking furries assigning their children fursonas before they’re even born

i just had to add

It hurts

when you’re kid turns out to be non binary 

THE LAST ONE IS MEEEEEE

I demand to see more “gender revealing” cakes

so i did a google search and lemme tell you the cishets are fuckin weird

guns and glitter was a recurring theme

YYYYYYYY THO

why would guns even be apart of a cake describing a human infant anyway…how is a deadly weapon cute

Let me clarify for y'all this some WHITE cis shit

^^^^^ For real

@homosexualjesus I can’t handle these I had to tag you

God fucking damn it

Who asked them anyway?

I don’t understand how their voices count in this conversation though????

And 100% of women could fucking CARE LESS.

Bet the percentage of women who haven’t benefited from viagra is higher.