does the threat of your tumblr disappearing ever cause you to go on a mad hunt to log into it again?
i just have like absolutely zero drive to write lately, really sorry guys, like i want to but then i open a reply and ive got ??? absolutely nothing lmao. if you wanna keep in touch more frequently you can always reach out for my d!scord or sn@pchat, i dont know when i’ll be back tbh but im not gonna force myself to do something when it just aint happening you know? xoxo.
claustrophobicwerewolf reblogged
when isaac spoke, lydia paused before she looked up at him. his question caught her off guard. honestly…she didn’t have an answer. or well, she did but it wasn’t a good one. “….i care about all of you equally. i don’t care that there’s others. i want to make sure that you’re all doing well.” she said. not totally the truth, and not totally a lie. a decent middle ground. in truth, lydia didn’t really know why she was so intensely attached to isaac 1.0 but she was. something about him….she couldn’t let it go. “and you’re not dying. you’re just in need of a tune up okay? and we’ll do just that. tune you up. make you better than ever. it’s going to be just fine, just you wait.” she said, moving over to open up the panel that was settled on his shoulder blade before she started poking and proding around in there. “these wires are ancient. we need to get you some of the good copper conductor ones. it’s gonna be just fine.”
just some new copper conductor wires. it felt hopeless to try and reason with her, he knew she’d always try to fix him. no matter how many wires needed replacement or memory cards needed to be added, she’d just keep working and working on him and he? he would never be good enough. “ humans are particularly sensitive to the sunk cost fallacy, no? is that all i am? ” as she opened up the panel in his shoulder, he glanced back to look at her face react to him. “ the fallacy only really makes logical sense when there is an end point, when you’ve finished with the product. i don’t think i’ll ever be complete.” he didn’t want to kill her spirit or drive, but he was meant to find optimization and continually investing in a product that should just be replaced is not optimization.
claustrophobicwerewolf reblogged
she would like to say that she wants to give him a good answer , but she doesn’t WANT much of anything anymore , as much as she wants to want . doe eyes glance up to look at isaac , a face she recognizes , a face she knows to love , but doesn’t feel .
head shakes , lips press together and she glances down at the hands that rest on her lap , fingers playing with each other absentmindedly . “ it feels like . . . it feels like i’m trapped inside myself . like i’m in this dark , dusty room and i’m just . . . laying there , on the floor , but i don’t really exist . i’m just there . “ she looks over at him again , shrugging her shoulders . “ she’s gone , isaac . she’s dead , buried somewhere in here . “ she rests a hand atop her own chest .
she’s dead. it was something he thought he faced before, when allison was stabbed he INSTANTLY felt that tug against his heart. the complete s h a t t e r i n g of everything he loved. but then, she was fine, he had her back and they’d be okay. how many times can you mourn the same person? how many times would he have to mourn her? taking a deep breathe he fought back against his watering eyes. he needed to be calm, for her - whoever she was. “ i felt you her, die that day. and i never felt her come back. if she’s gone, we can let her go. and you can figure out who you want to be. ” it was a strange situation, one he could only relate to based off his limited experiences with losing yourself. but he knew if she didn’t want to fight for it, then there was no sense in fighting at all.
“ i just want you to be happy, whatever that looks like - even if it means i’m not around anymore. ” was he holding her back? was he the problem keeping her from succeeding?
claustrophobicwerewolf reblogged
codeworn:
a frown forms on allison’s features at lydia’s words , as if what she’d said was almost insulting . “ i would rather be sitting inside on the floor with the two of you . “ which brings on a feeling she’s been doing her best to entirely ignore , but she’d be lying if she said it doesn’t make her nervous now— and even a little guilty . eyes wander to her boyfriend , lingering for a moment before they find lydia once more , and then her own lap . “ actually . . . i kinda have a confession to make . “
@bellexmort·
❝ yeah, okay isaac.❞ lydia said, shaking her head as she took another deep swig of her drink. she knew they were just trying to make her feel better, but honestly what couple wanted to have a hanger on during their date night? in reality, she knew that allison would try to reassure her as her best friend that it was all okay but….. lydia couldn’t help but feel like a burden. she could see the way isaac was holding ally, and the way that ally looked back at her boyfriend….and well, the redhead felt like maybe she should just excuse herself to her bedroom now. then ally spoke again. ❝ ….a confession? what kind of confession?❞ she asked, head tilted to the side a bit as she sipped her drink again, realizing it was almost empty then. ❝look, i can just go to my room and pop the tv on with my headphones in. really it’s not a big deal. you can still save your date night.❞
@claustrophobicwerewolf
sensing lydia’s sarcasm at his attempt at reassurance, he just shakes his head and let’s out a light sigh in response. mouth slightly agape, as allison speaks, his eyes dart between the two girls. while he wasn’t 100% sure of allison’s confession he was CERTAINLY intrigued in whatever she had to say. “ i really hope this is a good kind of confession ” he’s not going to overthink it, he’s not!
@codeworn
‘‘My mom is the one who suggested it growing up. I was very good at it and I learned all her recipes fast. It just kind of came naturally to me and if i was good at it, then she had a point. What about you? Did you always want to be making coffee for people or is this just a thing of the moment?.’’
“ I’ve eaten enough of your end of the day leftovers to agree that you’re very good at it. But my my dad wasn’t really a big latte guy, more coffee black type so I don’t have any lineage tying me to foam. More of a - I might as well kind of thing. Wait, so is this book filled with your mom’s recipes too?”
claustrophobicwerewolf reblogged
sofia falcone being drop dead gorgeous in 4x03.
queueing my replies but not tagging my queue so it looks like im just on the ball all the time?? ugh her mind.
claustrophobicwerewolf reblogged
@claustrophobicwerewolf sent 😘 to kiss my muse.
𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐨𝐧 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 around as she enters the room , heading straight towards isaac , hands finding his shoulders with a little hop so that she can wrap her legs around his waist. one hand finds the side of his face , thumb 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 his chin as she leans in to kiss him. she lets it 𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑 , tip of her tongue parting his lips to deepen the kiss and it’s only when she breaks the kiss for air that she speaks. “ you’re the 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 , isaac lahey . you know that right ?? “
sorry i’ve barely been here!!! life has gotten really busy and im trying to find the balance. but also my threads have become a complete mess so if i owe u something feel free to send the thread over to me and i’ll be more than happy to reply <3 <3 okay i love u all.
claustrophobicwerewolf reblogged
Claire answers the door with a smile on her face, always happy when Isaac shows up. Her parents are always working and it can get lonely being at home by herself at night. Though she has a sneaking suspicion that even if he likes to spend time with her, it’s his home life that he’s running away from and not her he’s running to. “You did great at practice today.” She hangs on the door a little before stepping back to let him come inside. “Big game Friday. You think the team is ready?”
Standing at her porch, he smiled back as she complimented him, but was quick to downplay his actions. “ Thanks but my pocket was bagged out half the game so I was throwing too high the whole time...if I play like that during the game Greenberg’s gonna make me do laps for eternity. The rest of the team should do well though. ” To be honest, he wouldn’t mind if Greenberg made him do laps, it’d give him an excuse to be out later but, he had no idea what that would mean back home. “ But, you should come - if Coach does yell at me you can make fun of the vein that pops in his neck. ”
@bloodyxbeast “ i turned around. you were gone. ”
“ sorry, i just i had to get out of there. i didn’t mean to ditch you like that. ” his eyes avoided hers, afraid of seeing either a stern glare or some sort of sadness, neither of which he was prepared to confront.
☾ - @ofbrokensouls - buffy summers
“ look - if you’re fucking with beacon hills, then you’re fucking with my pack. ”
@bellexmort “ i dreamt about you last night. ”
“ really? was it a good dream or a very good dream? ” ( wink wink. )
claustrophobicwerewolf reblogged
cora raises a brow at isaac, only taking a moment before leaning in closer. “i would love for you to accompany me to the garden. it always relaxes me before having to make a public appearance.” straightening up, she steps through the door and starts down the hallway. “maybe you could tell me which princes to avoid unless that list would be far too long.” she has little hope that this group of men are, at the very, least able to hold her attention.
following behind her, he keeps his hands firm behind his back to keep up the appearance that he is very dedicated to his job. “ coming from someone who wishes you happinessi’d say avoid all of them, but there’s a prince from finland, the house of hesse, that doesn’t seem too terrible. ” unfortunately for cora, all princes seemed to have this same air of entitlement and sleaziness that makes you want to punch them before they even say a word.
@codeworn “ frankly speaking, i wanna give up. ” (u know the verse uwu)
give up? the weight of the words hang heavy, heartbeat begins to accelerate as his mind goes into overdrive. give up on herself? give up on him? give up on ? ERROR: 404 - WHAT THE FUCK. his voice low and soft, eyes locked onto her, isaac tries his best to seem calm despite the internal breakdown. “ what do you want to give up on? ”