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Oh, This World Gets Heavy

Day Three: Grief By: @ thorbiased on AO3 Summary: The ride back had been tense and silent and painful. Each rider was worn down, tired and heartbroken. Thor was antsy. He paced up and down the Quinjet, wringing his hands together. He got several dirty looks, but if he didn’t pace, he was sure his storms would bring the plane down. Deep inside him, something was unraveling faster than he could hold it together. A/N: Title comes from “Second Chances” by Imagine Dragons (I think that’s it…I have the worst memory).

The Avengers came back to the compound when the drama in Wakanda died down. General Okoye had sent them all home, looking downcast. Their princess and king were dead, they needed a leader, but most importantly, they needed time to grieve themselves. So they left them alone to do just that.

The ride back had been tense and silent and painful. Each rider was worn down, tired and heartbroken. Thor was antsy. He paced up and down the Quinjet, wringing his hands together. He got several dirty looks, but if he didn’t pace, he was sure his storms would bring the plane down. Deep inside him, something was unraveling faster than he could hold it together.

They finally landed a few hours later. The team poured out of the jet, filed through the quiet compound, and collapsed at the dining room table. Thor could feel something off in the air, not just the storm that he could feel calling, not just the fact that half the universe was dead. He didn’t have the energy to ask.

Thor sat in a chair, slumped down with his head resting on the back of it. He studied everyone’s faces. It had been so long since he’d seen them all. Rhodes looked older, and now that his suit was off, Thor could see the metal braces that encased his legs. Another thing that he’d have to ask about. Natasha’s hair was certainly different, but a new hairstyle was in character for the spy. She looked older as well. They all did. Steve looked the oldest, with choppy long hair and a shaggy beard. Thor couldn’t help but think the captain looked unkempt. He thought of Stark, wherever he was. Dread swirled in his belly. He was alive, right? That wasn’t what was wrong with the place?

Thor jumped to his feet, anxiety making his stomach ache. Heart pounding, he started pacing around the kitchen area attached to the common room. There were several heavy sighs, but Thor ignored them. It was either that or he conjured a storm to match the pain he was feeling. (No one wanted that.)

He’d never felt so much grief in his life. He had a sneaking suspicion that no one person was ever supposed to feel this much grief. He’d lost everything. It started with Loki, his mother, and then Loki again, then Fandral and Volstagg and Hogun, Odin, Mjolnir, and Loki again, Heimdall, and Asgard itself. He wanted to scream, pound his fists into something, hurt someone as badly as he was hurting now. His pacing grew ever quicker, becoming more frantic than anxious.

“Thor!” Bruce shouted, louder than Thor really thought he needed to. The scientist jumped out of his chair and rushed into the kitchen where Thor was pacing.

Thor jumped, panting, to face the team. “What?” he croaked. His answer came in a bolt of lightning illuminating the windows of the common room. Sheets of rain fell, so hard that it looked white.

Panic clawed its way into Thor’s throat. He hadn’t even known he’d done it. Clenching his fists, Thor channeled every last ounce of energy he had into stopping the storm. All he managed to do was turn a downpour into a shower.

“Hey, deep breaths, Thor,” Natasha said, standing from her spot on the couch to walk over to him. Thor stood like a deer in headlights until her hands rested gently on his. “In and out. You’re okay.”

Thor followed her instructions as best he could, but he swore there was something constricting his chest. Was he being choked? “I can’t…br-breath,” he stammered.

“Yes, you can,” she said, gentle as ever. “Start small. Just little hiccups. In and out.”

Thor gasped like a fish out of water, but it helped. The tightness in his chest loosened. “They’re gone,” he whispered, staring hard at Natasha like she could somehow fix everything. “I don’t know what to do.”

Natasha’s face twisted in sympathy. “I know,” she murmured, rubbing her thumb over his knuckles.

Thor guessed that Bruce has told them everything, but even he didn’t know about Loki and Heimdall and the refugees. Oh, Valkyrie…the survivors… Thunder rolled outside the window again. He felt himself spiral again. His breathing became shallow and heightened.

“Hey!” she said sharply, pulling him back to the present, “Thor, focus on breathing. You need to sit.”

Thor would be eternally grateful for Natasha. She guided him to the couch, where Rocket sat waiting for his new friend. The raccoon patted Thor’s shoulder while he steadied his breathing. “That’s it, big guy,” he said. Thor couldn’t help but think that he must be grieving, too. Groot had gone in the snap. “Just breathe.”

Thor didn’t miss the confused look that Natasha shot Steve, but he’d have to explain once he could breathe properly.

Bruce returned from the kitchen with a glass of water. Thor took it with shaky hands, and lifted it to his lips. He looked around at the concerned faces that had gathered around him. “I’m sorry,” he said, “You all have your own things to grieve and here I am—“

Steve’s hand on his shoulder stopped him. “Alright, cut that out. You’re our friend, Thor. You needed help. We’re all grieving. We can do it together.”

“And if you’d kept going, you’d have flooded the place,” Rocket snarked, thumping Thor’s arm lightly.

Thor mustered a weak chuckle. “That’s going to be a problem,” he said, taking another sip of water, “I can’t control it that well.”

Rhodes sat down on the coffee table in front of him, resting his elbows on his knees. “We’ll figure it out. And we’ll get through this together.”

Thor nodded. He found himself believing the colonel. Grief still made his heart heavy, and he knew that this was going to be a long and hard climb uphill, but he believed Rhodes. They would get through this together.

“And if we’re lucky,” Thor said, cracking a smile, “we’ll kill Thanos together too.”

“Now that,” Steve laughed, clapping Thor’s shoulder, “is something to look forward to.”

Okay for Thor’s week day one: child, I had this thought the other day while I was looking for something to eat in the closet: what if there are certain things that Asgardians can’t have but Frost Giants can, or vice versa, kind of like how dogs can’t eat chocolate but humans love it! Then I thought of a little story, I hope you like it! I haven’t written stories in too long so it’s probably very bad but I tried my best😂

It’s a beautiful, crisp winter day in Asgard, not too cold but cold enough that Frigga dresses her little boys in warm clothes before she lets them out to play in her garden while she takes over for Odin while he is away. Loki is about the equivalent of one year old in human years, and Thor is about four, and always loves coming out to the garden with his little brother.

While Loki crawls around, babbling, Thor sees something skitter about in the corner of his eye, and his attention is quickly drawn to it and away from his baby brother. Upon turning his full attention to the creature, he sees that he’s found a pretty, green, shiny snake. Giggling, Thor chases after the snake, hoping to catch it and bring it back to show Loki his find.

Loki, now unsupervised, of course gets into mischief, without even realizing. He crawls over to Frigga’s beautiful, yet very poisonous to Asgardians, berry bush, grabbing a handful of the bright pink berries in his chubby little hand, and stuffing his whole hand into his mouth, humming happily at the taste.

Thor comes back, snake in his hands, grinning brighter than the sun. “Loki! Look what I found!!”

However, when he catches sight of the pink on Loki’s hand, his puffy cheeks and full mouth, and his dangerous proximity to the very poisonous berries, his face pales and he drops the snake, suddenly forgetting all about it.

He runs over to Loki and drops on his knees right I’m front of him, voice shrill in desperation, “NO!! NO, LOKI, SPIT IT OUT!!” He wrenches the remaining berries in Loki’s tiny hands out and throws them down, while Loki starts wailing, terrified from Thor’s yelling and yanking, thinking Thor’s mad at him.

Frigga comes running out at the sound of her screaming children, the sight before her making her heart clinch. Thor has tears running down his soft pale face, sobbing uncontrollably, and Loki too is wailing, and there’s the pink berries on the floor…

“Motha!!” Thor sobs. “I’m sorry! It’s my fault! I’m sorry!”

Frigga wastes no time I’m scooping up Loki, quickly saying to Thor, “No, Thor, it’s not your fault. You’re a very good big brother,” before running inside, Thor running behind her and Loki still wailing in her arms, straight to the medical ward.

The doctors quickly get to work on scanning Loki, but they get odd results to say the least. Loki is completely fine, just very upset. Frigga is unable to mask her relief, sighing and rubbing hand over her face. These children will be the death of her, she’s sure…

Thor looks up at Frigga with wide blue eyes, face still tear-streaked, and tugs her sleeve. “Motha? Why isn’t Loki poisoned by the berries?”

Frigga smiles down at Thor and smooths his blonde hair. “Loki must be super special.”

Thor’s face breaks into a grin then, showing off his baby teeth. He gives Loki a big hug and kisses him on the forehead, making Loki’s tears stop and gurgly laughter start again.

“You’re my very special brother, Loki!”

Loki reaches a hand out and pats Thor on the face, saying his name over and over. Thor giggles and ruffles Loki’s short black hair, then gives him another hug.

Yeah sorry that was so bad, teachers are always like “show, don’t tell!” and I think all of them would be revolted at my lack of that, but again, it’s been awhile since I’ve written anything that isn’t some stupid essays for school😭 anyway, I hope at least someone likes it!

The Five Times Thor Found a Family in the Avengers and the One Time He Didn’t

Day Two: Family By: @thorbiased on AO3 Summary: Basically what it says in the title. Heavy on the angst, whoops. A/N: Just an FYI, I’m the same author of “Glitter and Ribbons”, I just forgot to add my name to the last submission. Oh well. Also, I’m on mobile, so if the italics are messed up, I’m sorry. 1 Team

Tony noticed it, they all did. The way Thor, usually so energetic and full of life, eager to learn about earth and everyone, was closing himself off from the team. It was the first time he’d been back on earth since what went down in London. He’d showed up at the tower with a small smile and quite the story that he hadn’t really been able to get through without crying. The Avengers had sat together at the table, sharing concerned glances, when Thor was forced to get up and leave the room. He had come back with red eyes. Since then he hadn’t spoken much to anyone.

Thor had been back for three days when Tony decided to do something about the problem. He just couldn’t stand the sight of Thor moping anymore. (And okay maybe he understood exactly how the guy felt. Losing everything? Shutting everyone out? Ring a bell, anyone?)

“Thor!” Tony shouted, a big grin on his face. He stood at the elevator with a twelve pack in one hand and the entire Star Wars series in the other. “My man. How’s life treating you?”

Thor’s brows furrowed in confusion. “Stark?” he asked, taking a step forward out of the elevator. He looked past Tony for the others, all of whom were sitting on various pieces of furniture in the common room, wrapped in blankets and equipped with popcorn. “What is this?”

“Team bonding night,” Clint informed him, tossing a kernel in the air and catching it between his teeth.

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works